- 5 years ago
- Wedding: December 1969
My Fiance and I have been together since early 2009, engaged since 2010. We always planned on having a longer engagement, with next summer being our planned date for marraige. Now, he wants to get married while I’m on spring break!
Background info: Most of our relationship has been long distance, from April 2009 till October 2009; April 2010 til July 2010; and most recently from July 2012 til we can figure out where to settle down and actually have some money saved for it. He lives in Va with our old roommates, while I live in Md at my mom’s house while going to school.
While I’m going to school, I’m also working part time to pay my bills and for school. Right now, he’s not working and just moved back to Va from Tx where he moved for a job prospect that ended up failing miserably. Before that he was having trouble finding a job because of health issues that are now being maintained. We were hoping that him going to Tx would make it so that he would be working and I could go back to school so after a while we’d have enough saved up to be able to manage on our own again.
He wants to have a courthouse wedding with us and a couple of our close friends while I’m in town the week after next. I don’t think it’s the right time for us to get married, but I know how much this means to him.
In 2011, we lost almost everything; our home, close friends, and most of his family when he was in the hospital for five months. I was the only one who stood by him and didn’t make it out to be that he was lying or that he had caused things to turn out this way. Now that he has come back from Tx, people are once again treating him like he’s below them and that he deserves nothing. This time tho, he doesn’t have me next to him all the time and I think that’s what is driving this sudden urge to jump into the seas of wedded bliss.
If it weren’t for me being 200 miles away and going to school, I’d do it in a heartbeat, but right now, it just feels wrong. We had a lawyer friend draw up paperwork when he was in the hospital to protect me from financial burden in case something happened to him and we hadn’t yet paid off his medical debts, so that isn’t what’s bothering me. I just cannot shake the feeling that this isn’t the right time, that we should wait til I have my associates at the end of the year at least.
I have no idea how to talk to him about this, we tried to talk over the phone but it just ended up with us getting frustrated at each other, not helping since we had an argument this morning over finances. 🙁 I know I want to get married to him, and I’d rather it sooner than later since the possibility of something happening to him healthwise is rather high, but I feel like I’d be failing as a wife if something happened and I wasn’t near enough to actually be of any help.
I know this was long, and all I can say is thanks for reading, I really don’t have anybody I can talk to about this at home so it’s nice to be able to vent to somebody.