(Closed) Why can’t they just be happy for us?

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
11327 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

There is nothing you can do. It is a shame that people can’t just be happy for you, but you can’t MAKE them do it. Just ignore her and enjoy your time with the people who are happy for you.

Post # 4
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I don’t think there is much you can do. You can talk to them about how it hurts your feeling that they aren’t able to share your happiness with them, but it probably won’t turn out well because they will be defensive about their own unhappiness/problems with their relationship. Some people are just not able to deal with things and show happiness.

I know I wear my feelings on my sleeve so it’s kind of hard to keep disappointment inside.

 

Give them the benefit of the doubt. They are going through their own problems. Deep down, they probably are happy for you, they just have a hard time showing it over all their major problems that are agging on them.

Keep trying. Keep smiling. And brush it off your shoulder.

Post # 5
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

That is definitely disappointing and hard to take that family members are letting their own emotions get in the way of such a happy time.  Honestly, there is nothing you can really do to help them.  They each have their own issues to work through, clearly.  All you can do is try to be as understanding and compassionate as possible and focus on the family members who ARE excited and happy for you.  Hopefully cousin and great uncle will come to their senses in time for your wedding!

Post # 6
Member
6598 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

It is unfortunate but you can’t help the way others feel!

Don’t let this bring you down – remember what is most important – you are marrying the man of your dreams and that is all that matters so try and let the small stuff roll off your back!

Post # 7
Member
898 posts
Busy bee

This really sucks, but try not to let people rain on your parade. This is about your happiness, not theirs. It’s nice to have full support, but you can’t let the others get you down!

*hugs*

Post # 8
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I hate this people need to get over themselves seriously. I have had this happen within the wedding party and there was no reason at all sometimes people are just jealious wethere they got someone to love and are going to marry them or not. It stinks.

Post # 10
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

You don’t have to censor your own happiness just because certain people in your life aren’t in a place emotionally right now where they can fully be there for you. That sucks, yes, but worse would be to rob yourself of the joy your feel and want to express on their behalf.

Post # 11
Member
1080 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Don’t worry about it. You cannot do anything about how your happiness makes someone else feel. (I am assuming that you are not being a butt about it) I would mention tha you really wish they could be at your wedding and enjoy themselves. Good luck! Don’t let them get you down! Enjoy your joy 😀

Post # 12
Member
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

This is a happy time in your life and you have every right to celebrate it and shout it from the rooftops, as you say. What you need to do is surround yourself with friends and family who are able to share in this joy with you, who will allow you to be an insanely happy bride and not make you feel like you have to temper your feelings.

I’m sure your cousin and uncle are incredibly happy for you, but their own circumstances are only allowing them to give you so much right now. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you. Try to give them a break and understand that everyone goes through difficult times. It’s unfortunate that everyone isn’t on the same “happy page” at the same time, but so it goes.

Let them cope with their feelings in their own way, and continue to enjoy this special time of your life in your own way.

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