(Closed) Why can't we all get along?

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

Haha, yup! Did our seating chart yesterday, and it took all day. Finally got a version that I think will work – fingers crossed that we don’t get thrown any curve balls!

Post # 5
Hostess
11174 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

People are always going to complain no matter what. We worked really hard on our seating chart to put families and/or friends together and yet people still complained. Apparently they didn’t want to sit with their families but rather people they hardly ever saw.

/its a wedding, not a family reunion

Post # 6
Member
5075 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

just put them together.  Dinner will be an hour – after that people get up and mingle and switch seats.

They can be civil to each other for one hour on one day.

Post # 8
Member
5968 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Welcome to Grown-Up Town!

PopulationL  Your Guests

Put them where you want to, if they can’t get along, that sucks, they’ll have a bad time and no one to blame for it but themselves…I mean, c’mon, it’s not cradle school!

Post # 9
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

@out4answers: , @Treejewel19:  But that kind of ignores the fact that weddings are a type of family reunion.

I know, I know. It doesn’t make the seating chart thing any easier – I’m in the middle of it, too. But I do think that when people try to make that distinction, they lose sight of one of the very important functions that weddings serve. Yeah, it’s about the couple – but it’s also a major occasion for family bonding. And that’s important.

Post # 10
Member
9483 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

I became annoyed the other day when I got requests from FMIL as to who wants to sit with who.  It was mostly about FMIL’s mom, but she did mention a few other people.  I was then told after mentioning I had planned to sit parents and grandparents with each other, that it was her mom’s ONLY request to sit next to her brother and she wants to make her happy.  I tried to explain I could sit her brother nearby at the next table, but apparently that’s not good enough.

Also, I guess this wasn’t going to be brought up until I mentioned something about the seating chart – so imagine my surprise if I had completed it and then was told.  

So, anyways, I got a little bridezilla and said “fine, no seating charts.  Have everyone sit where they want to.  Let’s have my family sit on one side and yours on another.  No problem at all.  No mingling is totally cool with me.  Segregation at it’s best.”

It still bothers me because this is a wedding and not a family reunion.  It’s not like I’m going to separate the families all together, but whatever.  I wasn’t aware his grandparents were paying for the wedding.

…Sorry, I don’t mean to sound harsh.  It’s just frustrating.

Post # 11
Hostess
11174 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

@KCKnd2:  A reunion of the families is a bonus of the wedding itself. If someone is concerned about spending time with long lost Aunt Carol they can visit with her before the wedding, after dinner or the next day. The wedding itself is not to facilitate the reunion, but merely a catalyst if you will. So requests for seating are just not appropriate. Does that make sense?

DH’s family had an uncle that no one wanted to sit with. Each aunt/uncle came up to me and said it wasn’t and I quote “their turn” to sit with him. In the end I was really annoyed by everyone’s behavior and put them all together at one table with that dreaded uncle. Since they wanted someone else to “suffer” they will all suffer. 😛

Post # 12
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@out4answers:  Can’t even think about it. Will probably put it off to the last minute and hate myself. Was forced to do some family wants on our guest list but neither Fi nor I are close to our family and they don’t know the other half of the couple. Most of our guests are our actual friends and immediate family. I’m just going to fling the rest together and let them sort it out. I too am of the mindset a wedding is not a family/college reuinion. 

Post # 13
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I just did mine yesterday.  While it wasn’t torture, it wasn’t easy!  The good news is there are only two people that I knew I cannot seat together.  They are two tables apart.  There is another guest (guy friend of mine) whose date has apparently made the rounds within our sports club, and one of her prior dates will be there.  Fortunately, he will have a date too.  So–hopefully not too much drama.

But to be sure, I was having some difficulty, so I posted the following on Facebook:

Can I just say that doing a table plan for an event is really effing hard?!?! I hope everyone is happy, but if you’re not — then go to the bar instead 🙂
 
And most people wholeheartedly agreed!

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