(Closed) Why did you choose a destination wedding?

posted 7 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

very easy for me to answer….it has been my dream for as long as i can remeber to get married on the beach!  and ya, i had similar pros and cons as you.  definitely cheaper….although things still add up and it was more expensive than i initially i thought it would be, so be careful with that!! my biggest con was definitely certain people not being able to come.  But as people told me, once you are there, the people that ARE there make everything amazing and you just become a whole lot less worried about the fact that not everyone could make it!!!!

and it sure makes for some beautiful pictures!  check out my photographer’s blog of my wedding in Jamaica from a few weeks ago!

oh, and definitely come back tell us your proposal story if it happens in Mexico!!!! (or anywhere it happens!). have fun!

Post # 4
Member
3281 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

We had a DW because we wanted to have a nice, small, intimate wedding. I am not a big wedding kind of gal and a wedding on the beach is more our pace.

Also, like @PurpleUnicorn: said, I have always wanted to get married barefoot on the beach. It really is my dream wedding.

That being said, a DW can be much cheaper if you dont have a mom with very expensive taste lol

Which is fine, BC she is paying for it! A DW for us will cost about 20,000 vs an at home wedding which would have cost us about 50,000

Post # 5
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@HoneyBear:  yup cost varies, my DW cost $14K, an at home wedding though i have no clue.  i would have had to gone really low budget thats for sure.  but i think i put in so many extras to my wedding and splurged on things like my dress and decorations, that i *could* have done my wedding for $10K!

Post # 8
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@MrsKevyChevy:  my hubby and I wanted a completely non-religious ceremony, so thats one reason we were totally fine with the beach ceremony. although, we had the option to make it more religious. we had to specify that we didn’t want to. so i cant help much more than that, but there are tons of options i am sure you can work for the ceremony.

planning from far was fine with me because it was all over email and thats just how i do things anyway.  the only frustrating things were sometimes my wedding coordinator at my resort would days to get back to me, and whenever i asked for a picture of something, they didnt have one!  so i ended deciding and pakcing all my own decorations. it was much cheaper than what they were charging for things i didnt know looked like! (eg, centerpieces).

we had 17 people, us included.  be careful when everyone tells you they are coming. i had a lot of people say they were for sure, so at one i estimated 30 – 40 guests, then half backed out (for legitiamte reasons), just a warning as i have since heard this is very common.  but also once i was there, i was sooo happy it was just our small group. i got to spend time with everyone and it was overall less strssful! and a little cheaper too, lol.

Post # 9
Member
863 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’ve always wanted to get married on the beach.. always.  So that’s what we’re doing… the limited guest list is a plus!

Post # 10
Member
916 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010 - Al Cielo / La Laguna

@MrsKevyChevy: I couldn’t be happier that we had a destination wedding. We got married this past December on a private beach in the Riviera Maya, MX. Here are my thoughts as a married lady. =)

Cost:

It can be cheaper. It really is going to depend on the number of people and what type of ceremony/reception you want. I just started drafting a budget breakdown post for our wedding and the total I got for the ceremony and reception was about $4000. This included a 4 course filet mignon dinner, drinks, venue rentals, cocktail hour and ceremony/reception decor.

Now I did add in some extra things like custom vase/bamboo alter thing (you can see them in my recap posts), a kickass DJ and a independent coordiator. So after all my extras we came up to just under $5500 for 21 people (plus 4 vendors).

Romantic Location:

OMG Yes the location is one of the things that made our wedding amazing. Mr. M.s grandmother keeps telling people that it was like something out of a fairytale. Our guests are still raving about it being the best wedding they had ever been to. And it made our photos AMAZING!

Guest List / Small vs Large Wedding:

When we first started planning we knew that 90% of our family would not make it which included my BFF/MOH. Inititally I was sad about this but as our wedding day got closer it mattered less and less. In the end what I realized is that there was only a handful of people who were really a must have at the wedding. They were our parents and siblings. Everyone else was just a nice to have which was really hard for me to come to term with since we have such big families.

I worried and worried that with a group of only 21 people that it would be boring, no one would dance at the reception… well you get the idea. But everyone has told us that because it was a small group people were more relaxed and were really able to have a good time at the reception. The dance floor was full all night and the most reserved person in our group turned out to be the life of the party. Some of my favorite memories of our wedding happened at the reception and I know they would not have happened with a larger wedding.

Planning/DIY:

One thing that bugged the crap out of me at first was not being able to do more DIY projects. I could only do those things which I could easily fit in a small suitcase. Things like ceremony programs, menus, favors, OOT bags, etc. After having been through it I am so happy that this forced me to NOT go DIY crazy. I did enough to make it personal but not so much that I was pulling my hair out at the end.

Coordinator:

And as far a coordinator goes, don’t worry about that. I was able to email back and forth with ours and it was like having someone here locally. We ended up sending a lot of pictures to each other but it worked out very well. All of the details at our ceremony and reception were things I sent pictures of then Yazmin would write back any thoughts and/or cost and we would refine from there anything that didn’t work. I am a super anal control freak planner when it came to our wedding so I was really surpised that it came out perfect.

 


One thing you didn’t mention was the option of having an at-home reception afterwards. Then all of your family and friends who couldn’t come to the wedding can still celebrate with you. You could do something as simple as a backyard bbq, a semi-formal party or a full on reception.  We choose to do a semi-formal, dance till you drop party this June. 

Sorry to write a whole book but I hope this helps! 

Post # 12
Member
2384 posts
Buzzing bee

@MrsKevyChevy: Where are you going on your vacation? FI and I are getting married at The Royal in Playa del Carmen on May 28 (10 days!).

We both knew right away we wanted a DW and luckily our families were on board. My family is from Connecticut, his is from Missouri, so either way one side would have to travel. We’re also paying for the entire wedding ourselves so it helped to keep costs down. 

I’m also a very shy person who hates to be the center of attention. I like the idea of less than 20 people staring at me than 200. 

Our DW cost $12,000 but that includes EVERYTHING. Including our trip/honeymoon (1/3 of budget) and parents’ trips (1/3). Our parents were very taken aback that we wanted to pay for their trips but I’m glad we were able to. We didn’t want our wedding to be a burden to them.

Post # 14
Member
1145 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We are doing a destination wedding, but not on the beach.  Instead we are in the mountain region of Maine, and it’s about a 4-5 hour drive for most guests.  We opted for this route because we wanted everyone to feel relaxed and in “vacation” mode.  I would have loooooooved the beach, but my FI is not a sun or beach person so that was out.  We also knew his mom and many of our siblings wouldn’t go if we were further away.  So we kept it manageable and have only invited 60 people.  That was tough, but we really do want an intimate event.  We are spending more money or at least as much money as doing a big traditional wedding in our home town area, but this covers a week in Maine (in a mansion – MANSION on the side of a mountain!) and is covering events that we are hosting the entire weekend.  We couldn’t be more thrilled with what we are planning!

Post # 15
Member
4415 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

For us, it was an easy decision to have DW.  DH has never been married, and both his parents have passed. He didn’t want something big, and since I’ve been married twice before, I didn’t want anything big either. Both times I got married before, it was in Michigan, with family, done to other people’s expectations…  This time was done to our expectations alone.  We had opposition, but everything was perfect and we wouldn’t change it for the world.

The pros:

It was romantic and exactly what we wanted.

We got to go somewhere neither of us had ever been.

We had a low pressure day where we were relaxed and not stressed.

Everything, except our clothing, photographer, videographer and license, was taken care of for us. 

It was relatively inexpensive compared to what a wedding would have cost at home.

It was just the two of us, so we didn’t have to worry about anyone but ourselves.

There was no drama the day of our wedding with family members, wedding party, friends, vendors, etc.

 

The cons:

My mom was hurt and she played some mind games to try to get her way.

We had a lot of people question our decision to go away for our wedding.

No one we knew was there to share our joy.

 

See, the pros far outweighed the cons. I can honestly say, I don’t have one single regret about our DW. 

Post # 16
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

We didn’t really choose a DW it, it chose us. FI is military and stationed in SoCal. We will be getting married here and doing parties in our respective homes which are NJ and Ontario, Canada. We didn’t intentionally want a DW, but that’s what made sense for us. We want the wedding to just be small and intimate and away from all our extended family and friends. We just happen to be in the perfect position to do a DW. I feel like it’s an honour to be there while we affirm our commitment to one anothe and it should be kept private. We’re going to have just our parents and siblings with us in our paradise when we marry. I’m really excited!

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