- 7 years ago
- Wedding: April 2012
Here’s a little background:
Me: 23, graduated college last year (2010), analyst for a state department, taking 2 junior college classes this fall to strengthen my gpa and give me some knowledge about public health before I apply to grad school
FH: 22, in school for his AA, works overnight shift full time at a big chain retail store, totally messed up his GPA his first 2 years at a junior college and now he’s trying to get back on track
This week was the first week of classes. FH has stats on Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings, and we both take Nutrition on Tuesday nights. The problem? FH has only been to his stats class once this week. He claims he’s tired and that he is scared he’ll fall asleep on the road. He gets off at 6:30, his class is at 9. I understand that he’s tired. I suggested to him to take the bus to school or to take a power nap. He does neither, so I’m done giving him tips that he doesn’t take. Today he had to go back to my old apartment to donate a couch to Salvation Army after class.
Here’s our text message convo:
Him: How mad would you be if I skipped today? lol
Me: Don’t you dare skip class!! lol
Him: But I’d be awake driving when I get the couch. It would be healthier as well. Think about those things. And less chance of falling asleep on the road.
Me: Fine, I’m not your mom.
Him: Woooow. Why are you being like that? I’m just asking which decision is best?
(This is where I get pissed off.)
Me: What? You know what’s best for you and I’m not going to nag you. Everyone is tired when they go to class, even me. But you know what you can handle and you know if going to class will help or hurt you. So it’s up to you. I’ve already told you about you skipping, but it’s your grade and not mine. What if there’s a pop quiz? Or important stuff that will be on the test? Stats is not the class to slack off in. I don’t want to go to our Tuesday night class, but I know I should go. At the end of the day, it’s your grade and your decision.
Him (10 minutes later): Babe can you call me at 12 to wake me up? I need to sleep. I won’t miss another class, I just can’t do both without falling asleep on the road. Would you mind?
Fast forward a couple of hours, we talk on the phone. He asks me what’s wrong because I’m being short with him. I let him know that I hate when people ask for advice when they already have their mind made up! I can’t stand it! He says he just wanted my opinion. I told him that he knows my opinion and that I understand he’s tired, but he needs to find the motivation to go. I went off on a tangent about how half of the people in his class have kids and probably work full time and they still go to class. I was exhausted all 4 years of college, but I made the effort. After I finish, he gets quiet and then says well I’m going to read my book so I’ll call you when they get the couch. I said okay and hung up.
I’m seriously pissed because I can’t stand excuses! I probably could have handled this situation better, but I swear excuses make my skin crawl. This was our first major argument since we’ve been together and I’m not thinking about breaking up. I just can’t stand crap like this, especially when I’ve been there too! I worked two jobs for 3 years in college and still found the time to go to class.
Any opinions on the situation?