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that guy is terrible, she can do way better!
i have been broken up with via text message, but it didn't involve any horrible words.
my first boyfriend broke up with me with a comment on my public myspace profile, and said all this horrible crap. i certainly learnt my lesson and changed it to private after that! so not only could all my friends see, EVERYONE could see it.
i hope your friend finds someone who deserves her and treats her better :)
Thats so horrible! That is just so cowardly and immature. She will find someone better that she deserves!
Ugh, clearly she's better off without him.
That's crap. Some guys just need to grow a pair. Like my ex who one day decided that we were done and I needed to move out. End of discussion. And then changed the locks and held my stuff hostage midway through my move, because I happened to pack a kitchen knife that he just had to have. No lie. LOL it was a mess.
Because some guys aren't man enough to own up to their decisions, and deal with the aftermath. Instead, they'd rather be a dickhead about it, in hopes that the girl is so repulsed, he never has to deal with her again. Then, he can make himself believe SHE was the problem, not him, and he won't feel bad anymore
She really is one of the sweetest, nicest, most mature people I know, and unfortunately I sort of saw this coming when they started dating but I'm not one to meddle in people's personal lives/decisions. People are just ridiculous. This is one of the reason's I sometimes hate all this technology - it's way too easy to overshare or say things you would NEVER say to someone's face. I haven't spoke to her yet today as there is a time difference, but I'm going to see how she is doing as soon as it is a reasonable hour for both of us.
I told my DH I wouldn't mind if I never associated with his friend again - luckily, they don't talk all that much either.
@MrsSl82be: THIS! These are the words I was looking for. Unfortunately there is a little more to the story that I don't wish to share because it's not really my business, but the text message break-up also involved a crude photograph that was completely unnecessary to which she had no idea how to even respond to it. He succeeded in making her feel repulsed, but fortunately as I mentioned she is a better/bigger person and (hopefully) will stand her ground by not contacting him and crying/screaming/etc.
@catnip: I totally understand not wanting to divulge anymore information. Maybe when you talk to her, tell her that anytime she starts feeling bad/sad/remorseful/whatever, just think of that text and picture, and get pissed off instead. He doesn't deserve her hurt feelings, only her angry feelings. She needs to get good and mad, and then forget about him. He certainly isn't worth anymore of her time
@catnip: if most of their daily communication was by text, it may have just been his routine way to talk to her.
phone, text, face-to-face, it will ALL suck and it's never a lovely story.
@MrsTCB: They spoke on the phone all the time, and she knew the relationship was starting to slow down when they didn't speak on the phone daily. I guess I'm just appalled by text message break-up's in general, they just seem so impersonal after you've been so intimate with a person.
@daybyday: Ditto... situations like this make me remember how lucky I am to have an awesome DH.
That's terrible. People can be such jerks. What you said about making major decisions the days before, and then just being so mean a few days later, that baffles me too. One of my very best friends was dating this guy (whom I did not like for so many reasons and told her as much (as nicely as I could)) and they were house hunting, talking about kids, marriage, etc. She talked to him while she was at work about what he wanted her to pick up for dinner that night (they were practically living together), and when she got home a few hours later, all his stuff was gone, and there was a note that only said something along the lines of "I can't do this" and a stack of money. He wouldn't return he calls or texts, nothing. She eventually talked to him like two months later when he asked her to wait for him (uhhh no), and then she found out a couple months after that that he was engaged to someone else. I don't think she ever really got closure on the whole thing, but the whole situation was just ridiculous.
@bakerella: I'm not an expert but in my experience it seems like men tend to make irrational decisions really quickly but then not feel bad about it, while women tend to brood and plan and even when they finally do make a decision (like breaking up with someone) they feel horrible anyway. I can't imagine being in your friends situation - that's horrible to have someone just leave with such a lousy explanation.
My friend told me she is still very much in shock today. I hope that she heals quickly. I guess that is one benefit of an LDR - your lives aren't so wrapped up in each other's that she doesn't have to be reminded of him in her everyday life.
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It's a rhetorical question, because I already know the answers: fear, immaturity, disrespectfulness. But I need a vent!
Two of our friends ended up meeting at our wedding. They started a LDR and things were going great. I know nothing is as perfect as it ever seems and obviously a LDR is a hard thing to maintain when you are both living very different lives. My girlfriend called me yesterday in tears because DH's friend broke up with her via text message (in a not-so-nice way; I believe he was drunk and said some things he wouldn't say sober). She said all she really wanted was some closure and was upset because things had to end this way. She didn't respond to the message, and I told her not to bother because he probably wants her to scream/be upset/get angry and he isn't worth her time. She isn't stupid, she knew it probably wouldn't last - but when it goes from one week talking about possibly moving in together to the next week this person breaking up with you over TEXT MESSAGE, I think she has every right to be upset. Really, how immature is this guy? It's not like he's young - he's been in relationships, etc. And for goodness sakes, she lives a plane ride away - how hard would it be to pick up the phone and have an honest conversation about the state of your relationship?
All I can hear in my head is that "Text Message Break-Up" song...
End vent.