Post # 1
I feel like lately I hear this everywhere. People seem to treat a wedding as a big chore. I’ve even heard bridesmaids refer to being in a wedding as torture. Maybe I’m just a little sensitive about the topic with my own experiences. I’ve been with my FH for 8+ years. We’ve been together since freshman year of high school, so for me, this wedding is really meaningful but to everyone else it’s a chore. I’m really excited and love the crafty planning. Being engaged for two years, neither of my bridesmaids have asked to help with the smallest thing, nor do I expect them, but just knowing I would have that support would be nice. The only thing I have asked of them was picking out a dress.
When you ladies go to weddings, do you feel it’s a chore, or something you HAVE to do but hate? I’ve never been in a wedding party, but is it really that awful to be with your supposed close friend on one of their happiest days? I can understand as wedding season approches how it might get a little boring at times but why is it so awful?
What’s your ladies take on it? Have you had to deal with bridal party or guests who acted like this was torture?
Post # 3
I’ve never been in the wedding party, and I don’t find attending weddings a chore. I just absolutely HATE LONG DRIVES. otherwise, fun times all around!
Post # 4
I love going to weddings… get all done up, free food and hopefully booze, usually decent music, hanging out with some friends, dancing, watching my friends join lives… maybe I’m just lucky to have had such great experiences, but I’ve been a BM twice (3rd time this summer) and attended 5 outside of that (6th in 2 weeks) and loved every one of them. I’m a big cry-er during ceremonies; even though I’m not religious, people in love always get me.
Post # 5
@LilySparks: I can only explain why I dislike going to weddings/being in a wedding party. Most ceremonies are boring and long, especially if it’s super religious (I’m not, so not as much meaning to me). Being in a wedding means making time for dress shopping (which I hate), make-up/hair trials, extra expenses, and dealing with an over emotional, stressed out friend. Obviously, I would still do this for a close friend without complaint, but I still find it incredibly annoying. I do love wedding receptions though.
Post # 6
@LilySparks: I always find the ceremony part of weddings incredibly dull, and receptions are awkward and boring for me because a) I hate dancing b) I am very shy and hate making small talk with strangers or even casual acquaintances.
I love wedding shows and talking about weddings but I am not a fan of actually attending them… nor do I want one for myself. Never been in a bridal party before, but I would try to do a good job, within reason (i.e. bridezilla comes out, I’m out of there).
Your wedding will never be as important to someone else as it is to you. It sucks people aren’t a little more enthused, but at the end of the day, they don’t really have to be.
Post # 7
Personally, I really enjoy weddings and I’d love to be chosen as a bridesmaid/MOH (provided the bride didn’t go Bridezilla on me). I suppose the only thing that would annoy me is if I had to spend a huge amount of money.
Post # 8
Most weddings have average to bad food (bland proteine+overcooked veggie+common starch), barely decent alcohol, pretty boring ceremonies and way too many moment that only close family want to see (first dances, speeches).
90% of the weddings I’ve been to have been like that. When it’s different, I love it.
edit: forgot to add, I too hate long drives! provide transportation if you’re getting married somewhere not taxi-public transportation accesible!
Post # 9
Haha, I kind of hate weddings. I love pretty details (dress, invites, flowers, etc), but I don’t really like dancing/mingling with strangers. I almost always have enjoyed the ceremony itself in the past, but I’ve never been to a really long ceremony.
Post # 10
I find weddings boring, but I go to support the people getting married. I hate the ceremony portion the most b/c I have never actually heard one (I’ve been to many weddings, but no one ever uses a mic, so I have no idea what the vows have been – it’s just a lot of mumbling).
I also find them awkward b/c I don’t dance and usually you only know a couple of other people there.
That said, I am excited about my own wedding, but I am getting married for me and my FI, so I don’t care if other people find weddings boring or a chore, I’m doing it for me.
Post # 11
Depends on the wedding, and i’ve only been in one wedding, but being in a wedding can be expensive and stressful depending on the bride, I felt very honored, but my wallet felt angry! lol
Post # 12
@strawbs: Yes the long drives! I’ve been really fortunate with this one so far!
Post # 13
I agree with you, I don’t get it?? If weddings are so horrible and the majority of people do not like attending them, especially for the ceremony then why do we bother spending large amounts of money to provide food, entertainment, drinks and venue rentals for a large amount of people who don’t really want to be there. Why are you on this wedding site if you don’t actually enjoy weddings??? Seriously ?!?! If you don’t like attending weddings decline the invitation, no one is forcing you to attend its your choice.
All this talk of no one cares about your wedding as much as you do. It’s an inconvenient location, date, time etc.. I don’t want to sit through a long ceremony that has nothing to do with me…. Really?!?!?! have people and society become so overwhelming selfish that they cannot spend one afternoon, evening, day, or weekend celebrating a loved ones milestone and commitment of love? I really believe people have truly lost sight of the whole meaning of getting married.
According to the majority of responses people don’t want any part of it… so hopefully all those people are eloping and if they are offended by anyone’s insult to thier own wedding or lack of attendance or interest then karmas a …..
Post # 14
I love weddings! But I think it’s true that they are more fun when you really know the people getting married, and less fun when you don’t know them so well (distant cousin, work acquaintance). I think they are a blast most of the time, especially when the music is good!
Post # 15
I don’t really get it either, and my only assumption is that people that hate weddings have been to so many where the couple acted selfishly that it becomes a chore. I’ve been to a few events like this, there is a fine line for a host at an event that’s all about them. It’s easy to cross that line between “This is our day” and “This is our day, so smile or else!” especially in today’s wedding culture.
Post # 16
@canarydiamond: i enjoy getting done up too and going out but i hate long ceremonies. that’s why mine only includes vows, rings, and a kiss and whatever else the minister wants to say but he better keep it short. 🙂
i’m inviting 11 friends. the rest of my guests are family members so it’s intimate enough where they can all party and talk to me. i will not be “untouchable” for the day. but all in all weddings are not a chore – it’s a celebration and shame on anyone who treats your day as such!