- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
My kids are grown (I have three), but I wanted to have kids because they can be such a joy as I am sure you know with your 2 1/2 year old. They can also be quite challenging. I was blessed though with very wonderful children. People used to go visit one of my sisters and tell me that they didn't ever want to have children because hers were so misbehaved, but when they came to visit me, they decided they wanted children because mine were very well behaved. If you and your FI really don't want anymore kids right now that is perfectly fine. You can always change your mind later. Take a year or two to enjoy each other and then talk about it again. I am extremely happy that I had my children because to this day they are still my world. I don't know what I would have done without them.
I think it's partly hard to describe why I want kids. Something along the lines of feeling like it's something I am meant to do and supposed to do, but on a more subconscious level. After that, I just feel that Hubs and I will be good parents, and that we are very excited to explore the world all over again through our childrens' eyes. Plus I can't wait to see hubs as a father, and all of our parents are very excited to be grandparents, although there is no pressure yet.
Personally, I haven't fully decided that I want kids yet. If we have any, it won't be for another 5+ years at least so I will think more about it later.
I want to have more kids b/c there are very few things as rewarding as seeing a little person look at you like you're their whole world. With my daughter, it's been such a pleasure to watch her grow and change and even the hardships...the terrible two through fours =) have made me grow as a person and as a mom. To see her now doing things without me having to tell her, or making the honor roll, or being placed in honors classes, or even having other people tell me how well-behaved and personable she is makes me want to have more kids. She is 13 and my FI's sons are 24 & 20 and people think we are crazy to want more kids...but we do. We want to have the pleasure of raising kids in a stable environment and with a two parent home. We feel like if our kids turned out this great in single parent homes...if we join forces our kids will be unstoppable...LOL!
We have no real want for kids right now. We're open to that changing since we're still young, but if it does it won't be for at least 10 years. Perhaps by than that evolutionary drive to reproduce will kick in. ;) We have talked about a life without kids and would be okay with that.
I have a 14 month old(FI is not her biological father) and we mainly want more kids so he can can have his "own". He considers my daughter his and loves her as his own but he wants one with his genes and last name, ya know. He is amazing to Ava and i consider us great parents so we cant wait to have more!
They make you smile and laugh.
Another person that loves you forever (lol hopefully). I don't have hardly any family so it's nice to think about having a big family dinner when they are grown.
We want more kids because they make us laugh everyday and we both grew up without parents/family and it's a great feeling to love someone and take care of them!
I think our lives will feel empty without them. I can forsee us wanting a family in the near-ish future (couple of years) but I can't ever see us having none. Even if it happens later in life, I don't think that'd be for us. I have an amazing relationship with my mom and I cannot imagine not having that with my own daughter.
I used to say I didn't want any kids, but something last year just kind of clicked inside and all of a sudden I was like OMG I am going to be a great mommy. I know it sounds silly but deep down I just know FI and I will be awesome parents. We don't want to start until at least 3-4 years from now but we KNOW we want our own little babies :)
Similar to Jenny, it just suddenly clicked. DH and I were both leaning toward NOT having kids even though we felt that this is something to seriously keep reconsidering for some deeper reason--thus the issue wasn't settled. We found out we were pregnant ('accidentally' had sex during fertile window) and it was like a wave of immediate joy and gratitude came over me. We were thrilled and knew we could do it, despite the challenges, with God's help. 2 days later, I started bleeding and the pregnancy ended. We were so sad and then realized we are ready to have kids, so we planned our timing and we are now ending my 1st trimester very excited. Besides being a gift to our lives, we truly hope to raise a child that leaves this world much better than it already is.
I am 34 and hubs is 36 so we are in this discussion now. It's a lot of work, as we see from our friends/family. We have to be 100% sure before we go for it as it will dramatically change your life and put added stress/strain on your marriage and you need to be able to manage it financially. I love children and the joy they bring to everyone but I'm just not sure that we should have them. I see both sides!!
I grew up in a larger family (5 kids), and as annoying as they can get, there were so many fun times that can only be had with kids around (unless your husbands the type of guy to pull all the toilet paper off the roll and dress up in it :P)
It was kind of a given for me. I've always wanted kids, but I think that if you're not sure, stay off of it for now, because having more kids will affect everyone's life.
I think that it varies so much from individual to individual. Honestly, I wasn't sure if/when I wanted kids. Growing up my mom was more like a friend than a mother to me, and she always talked about how having kids changes your life and that she never wanted kids. (Don't worry, she loved us just fine, just wasn't a kid person, hence being more of a friend than mom.) Growing up with my mother as a role model (and I love her very much), I wasn't sure if I wanted kids, and I was always afraid that I would be a cold, distant mother like she was. But then FI and I unexpectedly got pregnant, and now we have an amazing 16-month old boy! I was pleasantly surprised to find that being a mother is the most wonderful, rewarding thing in the entire world, and FI and I can't wait to start expanding (January 2011, WO-HOO)!
We're not having kids. As early as four years old, I told my mom I didn't want to get married because I didn't want to get pregnant. That shows you how sheltered I was--I thought getting married got you pregnant since everyone I knew that was married had kids and no one I knew who wasn't married had kids!
So for me, it's always been a part of who I am. I love animals but feel absolutely nothing toward human children. As I grew up I found more and more reasons not to have children beyond my innate feelings. Granted, most are selfish reasons (not willing to sacrifice my body, my lifestyle, my money) coupled with a paralyzing fear of doctors/needles, but those are all pretty good ones to me.
I had myself sterilized when I was 26 because I was so sure I didn't want kids. I realized that decision could have left me unable to find a husband that was okay with that. But, fortunately, the next guy I started dating was completely on board, and we're getting married in ~2 months! We're both very excited about the lifestyle flexibility we'll have by not having kids.
I think if you want (more) kids, then that's totally great! But if you don't, there's certainly an equally rich and fulfilling life path open to you as well.
I have friends who seem to always love and be completely wrapped up in being a mother as if that is all they are meant to do but that is not me. That being said I have an almost 18y/o and a 15y/o two oops' when I was young. I can tell you from my perspective that kids are always a lot of work even as they grow up, they are also very rewarding I don't at all have any regrets. Being a mom is a decent part of who I am although not all of it, but enough that I think about mine leaving the nest and think what will that life be like? I also can see that life without kids might be for some who like more solitude, but to me it would feel lonely.
My new hubby is super nurturing and has wanted to be a dad for at least 20yrs now. It would be great to give him that gift since he spoils me like crazy, being his baby's mamma will be fabulous. His entire family is very close, he's such a family man. Even our lifestyle revolves around family functions and entertaining friends so growing our family just feels right for us.
Wow re-reading this from a different angle it looks like having kids is for personal entertainment, anti-loneliness, gift giving and parties...lol makes you wonder who's truly the selfish? Do what feels right.
My husband and I have our son who will be 2 in september and we are going through the same discussion now. We just dont think we want anymore kids (but who knows in 3 years). the only difference is I have been on birth control for about 10 years so we are thinking maybe vasectomy. they say its reversible. I dont know though - can you truly know if you are going to want to have kids in 2 or 3 more years. this is what we are trying to figure out - i dont think there really is any advice that can be given. time changes peoples opinions... good luck on your decision cause we sure dont know about ours lol
I never wanted kids, until I got pregnant. And then I got pregnant, and like some PP, I thought about what family meant to me and couldn't imagine NOT having a child. After that, my other kids came about organically and again I thought I was done. Then my husband and I got married, and I knew I would have his baby, which I'm pregnant with now. So, I'm probably done, since this is a boy, but who knows. What I love about having children is experiencing the world through them all over again. Remember how excited you were when yo learned to spell your name or tie your shoes? A million times more exciting watching your child do it! My older daughter is low functioning on the autism spectrum, so her victories are even more exciting. I feel like I have the ability to raise children who will be good people to do good in the world in some capacity and that's pretty rewarding.
I always felt like I wanted kids....someday. IT wasn't until I was married that I felt ready for kids (or as ready as I will ever be!) I wish I could articulate better the why - because I know the why nots were really clear (I love sleep, I love to have my freedom, I love to spend time with friends/husband/family, etc.). I know it is a part of life that is important to me, to us, that feels like its missing.....I'll see if I can articulate this better in a few months :)
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| rachgirl82 | 36 |
| kate02121 | 12 |
| ndreighton | 11 |
| pengoala | 10 |
| louiseW | 10 |
| Lyndzo | 9 |
| Indecisivebride2012 | 9 |
| msdragon | 9 |
| ozpeony | 8 |
| Miss Mochaccino | 7 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| mommytobee | 1 |
My FI and I have been talking about when and even if we want kids. I already have a 2 1/2 year old, and he is my world, but we don't know if we really want any more. So I'm curious, Why do you want to have kids. Or don't want too?