Post # 1
I sent out our save the dates about 2 weeks ago. I had always felt that save the dates were an unnecessary cost and I did not want to do them. Certain members (well member) of our family put a lot of pressure to send them out so we just did it to make peace.
We are having a local wedding in our home town, I just feel that save the dates in this situation is the equvalent to Valentines Day and Hallmark, another expense that the wedding industry created that you feel obligated to participate in.
Now the save the dates are out and we are getting all these questions. “How do I RSVP?”. “There is no information on the card” “What time is the wedding?” “Is it just me and my wife or can I bring my kids?” Etc etc etc.
They are not invitations, they are save the dates and therefore all the information you need is on there. We are getting married on this date, save it. That is all
Anyone else have guests not understand the save the date idea?
Post # 3
I’ve only ever received a couple of save the dates, but it was pretty obvious to me what they were. I’d never heard of them when the first one popped through the door, but I remember thinking, “that’s pretty cool – that means I can put the date on the calendar well in advance and keep it free”.
Quite a few of the save the dates that I’ve seen on here are very ornate and busy, which may explain why people get confused between them and invitations. Also, I can imagine my older relatives being confused by the concept as it’s not so common here.
I’m going to do them because I really want to, but I don’t think they’re a “must” by any measure. And I expect a couple of confused phone calls! (Hopefully no more!)
Post # 4
- Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ
That’s an interesting challenge I hadn’t thought of! Hopefully my family members won’t be confused since we plan to send them out. I’ll let you know how it goes next month. 😉
Post # 5
Yeah we weren’t gonna do them at all, and I don’t think they are necessary, but since we got married in the summer and knew people want to make summer plans early, we did them.
Ours were really simple, just a cardstock postcard from kinkos.
Post # 6
We decided to do them because we have out of town guests and its a Friday wedding. Did you have on your STD “formal invitation to follow” ? That’s strange that your guests think the STD are invitations.
Post # 7
Did you say on them “Formal invitation to follow”? That might be the source of confusion.
Post # 8
My STDs were very simple and very clearly stated “formal invitation to follow”. Sooo many people are asking me questions and R.s.v.p.ing and I sent them out 3 months ago.
I didnt send them all out at the same time bc I didnt have FI’s address and never even knew if he would ever get around to getting these adress. When someone found out they hadnt gotten a STD they were mad that they werent invited.
But a lot of people appreiate them so that they can “save the date” bc people a lot of people plan their vacation days a year in advance.
Post # 9
Yes are were super simple, just a picture post card (mostly because I didn’t want to do them). Just had the date, the location, our website, and invitation to follow.
Post # 10
@Snowy414: Well if you put “invitation to follow” I’d just direct them to the bottom of the card and be like “this is not the invitation, see the note at the bottom”. But I get frustrated when people don’t read things fully.
Post # 11
Esp since you put invitation to follow it seems explanatory to me. I think the save the date might seem like a “newer” concept to a certain generation of guest. I wonder how long these have been around. I know I have been getting them is the past 5 or so years. But I think that in when the gained popularity. So maybe to those people who haven’ been to a wedding in a while they just are well out of the loop.
Do you have a wedding website? We created one for 2 reasons. Beacuse my family is from Chicago and we are getting married where we live now in MI and thought it would be the easiest way to update people and also to save the both of us from repeating a lot of the same answers all the time. Just a thought 😉
Post # 12
We didn’t do STDs because we didn’t have a finalized guest list until the day we addressed the invitation envelopes, lol! FH had a little freak out after we received a STD in the mail recenlty, and he thought we should have done them, too. Now that I read this, I’m glad we didn’t!
Post # 13
They’ll figure it out. Just try to be patient and remember how much you want them to be at your wedding. Try to be thankful that they’re so interesting in coming! 🙂
Post # 14
This is why I am sending out maybe 10 save the dates, and half of them will probably be electronic (and I am definitely putting ‘formal invitation to follow’ at the bottom).
Post # 15
we sent them because it’s a dw for half of our guests. it said “formal invitation to follow,” but all of the older people thought they were the actual invitations.
Post # 16
alot of people dont know about save the dates. My friend sent out her STDs and she had people actually criticising her “invites” because they didnt have all the necessary information even though it clearly says formal invite to follow. I decided not to do STDS because i also feel they are unncessary and people just dont get them