Post # 1
I got engaged a few months ago and was over the moon about it! I found the perfect guy my family approve so everything should be super easy planning my wedding! Boy was I wrong it started with nothing but fighting that has stopped for now. I’m the youngest of my family, which happens to be all girls, my sisters are all engaged to their long term boyfriends. Anyways, you would think my mom would be exicted about all of seeing as it’s the first wedding well she hasn’t really acted like she cares. But my mom is all exicted that my sister is having a baby by her bf that no one likes (this isn’t my moms first grandchild either so I really don’t understand). My mom is talking about how she’s going to help my sister with the baby and everything which is fine, but she hasn’t offered to help with my wedding that is in a few months I don’t expect her to help me with my wedding but it does upset that she’s so happy about this baby and isnt has happy about my wedding. My fh family is so happy for us and this will be second marriage. I just want my mom to be has happy for us has his mom is. I don’t understand, maybe I’m just being a spoiled brat idk I just want some input on it and if anyone haa had this.
Post # 3
Wow. I feel you here. It is so disappointing when the most important women in your life acts like she doesn’t care about one of the most important events in your life. I am so sorry! Congratulations to you and your fiance!
My advice is to keep her in the loop with all of the things that you are doing for your wedding. (like things that SHE should be involved in) Tell her casually, and be ready for any sort of response, because you may get nothing at all. At some point, you may need to do things without her, so ask,” hey mom, I want to go dress shopping, is this something you want to be a part of?” She may say yes, she may give an excuse, but either way, you have done your part of keeping her in the loop and giving her the option to be a part of your wedding. You will have no regrets about your own actions this way. It is hard though, because you need to realize that she may not care enough to want to help (like my mom), and you need to keep a level head with her so that you dont lose her.
So sorry that you are dealing with this too 🙁 Try to focus on the people who are excited for you, and celebrate with them!
Post # 4
That sucks and I’m sorry you feel like your mom isn’t interested, that would be very hard.
Not that it’s an excuse, because both are very big life events, but in all honesty (without being rude) babies are more important then weddings IMO. That doesn’t mean your mom shouldnt be giving you the same attention for your big life event, but in her head the wedding is just ine day, the baby is forever so I get where she’s coming from too.
Post # 5
That’s so sad! I’m sorry you have to deal with this…
Post # 6
@LoveBug2013: Just another perspective, and not saying you’re wrong for being disappointed, BUT – a wedding is one day, a party. A baby? That’s a life, a beautiful, precious little life that’s coming into the world. It’s a new family member. A baby is more awe-inspiring than a wedding.
If your Mom is being really dismissive about the wedding, then I say talk to her about how you’re feeling. But if she’s simply *more excited* about the baby, drop it.
The wedding is your world right now. But you have to keep things in perspective. While it’s a big event in your lives (meaning you and your FI), not everyone is going to be as jazzed. To everyone else it’s a party.
Sorry you’re bummed.
Post # 7
My mom doesn’t really care either.. I tell her ideas I find.. show her favors I buy.. but she really doesn’t show interest.
I believe she’s quite mad at me for wanting an all-out wedding. When I first got engaged she was all, “Oh we can have it in the backyard!”. It took me weeks to get her to understand that I didn’t want a backyard wedding, I also don’t want a church wedding. She’s argued about SO many things.
She even went as far to tell me that nobody would marry us unless I had a regigious wedding [which of course, is BS].
I’ve really given up trying to get her involved.. I tell her what I do and that’s about it.
Post # 8
I under that its just one day and that the baby is forever. But I think I’m so upset because I got engaged before Christmas and we just found out about the baby last week so my sister is just a few weeks along. And I get that everyone is going to be all jazzed up about it because we just found out but no one was all jazzed up about my wedding from day one. So I know it’s just more my feelings are even more hurt than they was.