- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
First off, we all think bad unfriendly things towards people from time to time. We are human and sometimes, they just come to mind and we can't seem to control them. It happens to the best of us, so don't beat yourself up too much about it.
Secondly, since I can't remember your particular situation, are you eloping? Or just having a super-small & intimate wedding that no one except really close friends knows about? What is your relationship to your friend? Does she know you are getting married?
I'm sorry for all the questions, but I'm trying to get an idea of the situation!
Yes we are kindda eloping... all planned though so it's not really eloping lol
http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/secret-wedding-shhhh
at the ceremony it'll be my brother and brother-soon-to-be-inlaw and my partners 2 kids and thats it... then we're having a BBQ dinner that night and inviting close friends and family (only about 20ish) to break the news :)
I have 5 friends who are my close best friends! and she is one of them.... they know something is happening on 10/10/10 but because i haven't told them they aren't sure what the hell is going on. a little while i was over at the other bride to be parents place with all the other girls too having morning tea and the bride to be's mum was like "so Juliette what have you got planned for your wedding" and i was like "oh not 100% sure yet" AND THEN the bride to be said "oh so yous are still getting married?" which i felt was a bit weird because i never said anything about not getting married.
I definitely think it's normal to feel stuff like that towards friends sometimes, especially in a situation like yours where you have to be quiet about your wedding while she can talk about hers all she wants!!!
People may be questioning the wedding if they haven't heard a lot about plans from you.
I love the idea of a bbq!
Yeah i know that... but still to outright think we're not getting married anymore i thought was silly... i would have told them that. I mean don't some brides keep somethings sercet anyway... or is it just the elopers? LOL even if i was having a normal wedding i would still want everyone to to shocked and surprised on the actual day
first of all...you have a totally cool idea! how fun and romantic!
I had very similar feelings you are having toward your friend but toward my sister and my sister is my rock, my friend, hell she even raised me! she was a big gal, weighing over 280 at one point and she stopped drinking soda and took a 2 mile walk every saturday and lost a little over 50lbs in a year.
i was disgustingly jealous and i was not supportive or caring at all. see...i work out all the time and am almost always on a "diet" and i have lost a measly 30lbs in like 3 years! UGH! it is so hard. it was so tough to watch her eat a big mac and still loose a pound that week while i am sweating my ass off and starving to lose a pound a month. but....
i just now recently got over it. I finally decided to be happy for her. and realize that she did work hard for her weight loss and she does deserves it. also, i am thankful that she is healthier and will be around longer. i cannot believe how selfish i was. i thought awful things, i even pushed her to drink a soda a couple of times. what the hell is wrong with me? why? i honestly was affraid taht she would be skinner than me...
why the hell does that matter? seriously.
my long and drawn out point is that we, for some reason, think awful thoughts about the ppl we love for different reasons; usually becuas eof jealousy. I am not saying that you are jealous of your friend but there is a little part of you that probably wants to be updating your fb status about wedding planning and talking about it with all yoru friends.
just dont feel guilty..it is normal. but...try to remember, she is not doing anything wrong. embrace your decision..you will have a pretty cool story to tell for a very long time :D
Oh ok :) Now I know what's going on with ya..
I think everyone has felt like this at one time or another, and it usually does stem from jealousy, be it something big or small. In all honesty, I have sometimes looked at other bees wedding pics (colors, dresses, etc) and had jealous thoughts like "why didn't I pick those colors?" or "I wish I would've had that dress" but I just have to remember, it's about WHO I married, not what I was wearing or how many people were there.
You have decided to have a secret wedding (which I think is pretty cool) and that's your thing. I think it will be cool to announce it to your family afterwards! As for your friends, hopefully they will be extremely happy for you and be able to celebrate your marriage to the man you love, even if they didn't get to be in on it!
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| rachgirl82 | 36 |
| kate02121 | 12 |
| ndreighton | 11 |
| pengoala | 10 |
| louiseW | 10 |
| Lyndzo | 9 |
| Indecisivebride2012 | 9 |
| msdragon | 9 |
| ozpeony | 8 |
| Miss Mochaccino | 7 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| NotAnotherAnonBee | 3 |
| Sunfire | 2 |
| flamingred | 1 |
| pinkshoes | 1 |
| QuietOne | 1 |
| rachgirl82 | 1 |
| pengoala | 1 |
| ticatica | 1 |
| beargoose | 1 |
| violet25 | 1 |
Why is that i feel Jealous when i see my friend who's also getting married this year in October talking about her wedding stuff... it makes me wanna just tell everyone the secret... but then i think no... i don't want anyone to know that i have everything already and i'm just waiting for the day to come now.
But there is just something inside me that wants to say something nasty when i see her facebook status something like "just went to the bridal expo with my beautiful bridesmaid" ... something snaps inside and i feel like saying NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR WEDDING.... which isn't true and completely horrible to even think... but there is no way that i would ever say it... i just feel upset everytime that i see stuff like that. It's my own fault really... then i think about sharing it and doing it different but then i realise that it's not how i want it and that i really do want to do what we are doing now, and i wouldn't be happy to change our plans and have a "normal" wedding.
has anyone else had these feelings towards a close friend and felt really bad for thinking that... even if it's not wedding related
Oh i feel like such a horrible friend for thinking horrible things!