Post # 1
This is my first post on the boards–I’ve never been able to see the “Write A Post” button before! FI and I are both in our early 20s. We are having a small wedding with ~50 guests and we are each having 3 attends. The FI has already chosen his BM and GMs, his brother and two uncles respectively. I’ve chosen my MOH who is in her upper 30s and 1 BM who is in her early 40s, and yet I want to ask a family member who is only going to be 18 at my wedding to be my 2nd BM.
I am not worried about what people will think of this big age difference, etc, but I am worried because my MOH and other BM and I will want to have some mature-ish fun, like at the bachelorette party, and my future mother in law can get risque/suggestive with her comments on Facebook and all, and I would really like to include my 18 y/o BM as much as I can. I mean, I don’t want her to feel left out or like I added her as an afterthought.
Any ideas on how we older girls can still have fun, without excluding the younger BM too much?
Post # 3
I don’t think she’s so “young” that she needs to be left out…. For example, I was a BM in my brother and SIL’s wedding when I was 14… She talked to my mom and I, explaining that her bachelorette party may be too risque for me… So, I got her a gift (several VS products in her favorite scent) and just gave it to her at another time, but didn’t go to the party.
Your BM is old enough that you can warn her that it may be a bit risque and leave it up to her. I have a feeling she will choose to come 🙂 You’re in your early 20s, so it’s a 5ish year age gap – not that big 🙂 So, let her choose… or don’t even make a deal out of it and simply include her 🙂
My bachelorette party wasn’t really risque – It’s just not how my friends and I are… And it was totally fun and doable… So, if you want to, you can have a less-risque party… But you totally don’t have to!
Post # 4
Three of mine are in their mid-30s, one is 19 (will be 20). It’s fine so far — the youngest lives out of state and won’t be coming up for the bachelorette, but will be a part of the shower. I don’t think she’s done much to help with planning it (and that’s probably how the other three want it). But it’s important to me, the 19-yr old, and to our family that she be in the wedding party and I think everyone is happy with the way it is playing out.