Will I ever want to have sex again?!? (TMI alert!)

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
728 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@SweetMelissa429:  I had the same thing happen to me. I had absolutely no desire during my whole first trimester and it’s the same thing now that I’m in my third trimester. Second trimester my libido came back with a vengeance. DH loved it! Also, are you sure it isn’t just a problem of being dry? I know that most pregnant women are supposed to have an increase in moisture down below as well as an increase in congestion. However, it’s the complete opposite for me. I even have severe drying of my nose and eyes no matter how much water I drink. Try a little bit of lube to help get things started. We have to do that even when I’m really in the mood. 

Post # 4
Member
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@SweetMelissa429:  I am sorry you feel that way but I can assure you that you are not alone. I have NO DESIRE whatsoever to have sex. Poor DH is very understanding but I still feel akward and strange. I hope we’ll get back our energy and libido soon. Hugs!

Post # 5
Member
1304 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I have had zero interest in sex throughout the majority of my pregnancy.  (Today is my due date.)  It sucks.  I also thought/hoped it would get better but it just never did.  I managed to have sex two nights ago but to be honest I was just hoping it would get labor going.  (Shhhhh don’t tell my husband that!)

We have barely had sex since around the beginning or middle of my second trimester.  I basically felt (emotionally) like I had PMS for about 5 months straight, and my husband was also being uncharacteristically insensitive about certain pregnancy-related things, which did not help the cause.  By the time my “PMS”/depression/anxiety cloud lifted I only had about 1.5 months to go and I was getting to many painful sharp pokes into what felt like the top of my cervix to even contemplate any additional action in that area.

I feel bad for my husband but I really could not handle any additional demands on my time, attention or body.  It’s just been too much.

Post # 7
Member
5506 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

Totally common and normal! I had no interest the 1st trimester due to extreme nausea and boob pain as you mentioned. By the 2nd trimester I did have somewhat of a sex drive again, so hopefully yours will come back soon. Oh an towards the end (well, basically the last few months) when I felt like a whale I had no drive again. But I know some women still do in the 3rd trimester. Everyone is different.

Post # 8
Member
5506 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

@ElbieKay:  I felt the same as you most of the pregnancy! Raging hormones…ugh! Hope your little one comes very soon. So exciting!

Post # 9
Member
2190 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Very common and normal. I barely had any sex drive through my pregnancy and could count on 2 hands (maybe one lol) how many times we had sex through my pregnancy. Things resumed as per usual 6 weeks post partum! It’s hard growing a human! 🙂 

Post # 10
Member
695 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Wait until the “good trimester” Which is the 2nd one. Your drive will come back. Promise!

 

That first trimester so much is going on inside us, we dont feel the urge to do much.

Post # 11
Member
1926 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@SweetMelissa429:  Not sure if this will be the case for you, but I am well in my 2nd trimester (19 weeks) and its still not back, its still a desert and I feel terrible because of it! 🙁 My poor DH has been so understanding but when we have forced it I have hated it so much…. 

I hope yours comes back sooner than mine is! 

Post # 12
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Yeah…. I haven’t had any sex drive and I’m 25 weeks.  We’ve done it a couple times.  DH also says his drive is lower than usual, not sure of the cause but that’s fine by me!  Hopefully things get going again… eventually…

Post # 13
Member
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Totally normal. I had this until about 12 weeks…now I’m 14 weeks and poor FI is over being groped everytime he’s in reach. Everyone is different, sometimes pregnancy makes women MORE keen on sex and sometimes it does completely the opposite. Wait till after baby is here, it took me 14 months to get any normal sex drive back after my first pregnancy 🙁 hope yours levels out to something normal soon. 

Post # 14
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Im 21 almost 22 weeks and we ve had sex 3 times since conceiveing…..my drive came back at about 14 weeks but im just so tired still it doesn’t matter how much id like to do it im asleep before we ever get started 🙁 now mind you I start work at 630 am so that could be where my tired comes from 🙂

 

I hope you do better than me!

Post # 15
Member
262 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I had a pretty good sex drive all the way through – but we also got preggnant right after the wedding and we had waited to have sex.  I was 32 and all kinds of “I’ve waited forever for sex BRING IT ON!!!!!”   But, I do remember being drier than normal.  I think we just tried lube and/or powered through.  Please know that breastfeeding can make you really dry, so if you’re planning to breastfeed, you may still need lube during that period.  I also struggled because DH couldn’t touch my breasts without them leaking and I needed that stimulation to get turned on.  I felt bad, but I was kind of glad when my milk dried up and things between us were normal again.

Post # 16
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I enjoy sex when we have it, but typically when he brings it up my first reaction is, “but I’m so tired and my belly feels gross and I don’t feel the least bit attractive…” but he has been so attracted to me since getting pregnant. Im 12 weeks tomorrow. He knows he just has to work a little harder, since I’m not ready to jump his bones at this time, and we use lubricant more often now then we did before, but once he puts done effort in I always find it enjoyable. I feel bad so I try not to seem so hesitant when he is clearly interested…

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