Post # 1
I’m at my wit’s end with planning our wedding. I have zero interest in it and it’s upsetting me more than making me happy at this point. We have very little money and cannot afford to accommodate everyone we’d have to include.
We’re supposed to get married in the Catholic church, but all the jumping through hoops and expense involved with that is making me sick to my stomach. It’s in the thousands. I just want to get married to my fiance and get on with life!
It’s both our second marriages. Both of us were married for about 6 months many years ago. We’re in our mid-30’s. I am not comfortable accepting monetary help from anyone for our wedding, as I feel we’re adults and that would be highly inappropriate. Furthermore (not that I would even ask), it’s been made clear to us that no one will be helping us with money for this wedding. So there isn’t any option of sucking up my pride and asking, before anyone suggests that.
I feel sad that my first wedding was so beautiful, yet my husband at the time was the absolute worst. Now I am engaged to the love of my life, the most wonderful man I know and we can’t celebrate the way we’d like to. We can barely afford to make ends meet at this point. My fiance is embarrassed to just get married in a church ceremony without a reception of some kind. He thinks it will look bad. I really don’t care at this point. I just want to get married, no fuss, no muss and get on with life. I worry he’ll resent me for the rest of our lives if we do that.
I feel like I can’t win.
Post # 3
This is my second marriage and we opted for the courthouse; afterwards, we had a lovely sit-down dinner with 3 other family and friends. No drama, no bs, and a really lovely day. Maybe you should reconsider your plans?
Post # 4
My mom is getting re-married this summer and she is having the ceremony in a friend’s home (they offered after my mom told them it would be in her own home, so it will either be in their home or in our home depending on if they are going to be out of town on vacation on the date), with a “reception” at a restaurant. The reception isn’t really a reception – just a sit down meal with close friends. It’s a lot more affordable than some other options out there. And you wouldn’t even necessarily need to do the reception/dinner in a restaurant, there are even more inexpensive options, like BBQ, etc.
Post # 5
Update on this…
My Fiance has realized how much this is stressing me out and also how the majority of these expectations are falling upon me, as the bride. Everyone assumes I’m having so much fun planning and wants to know all the details. It’s annoyingly the subject of every conversation with people these days. It upsets me because there isn’t much I can do about planning things.
We’ve agreed to take the party off the table for now. If we can afford to plan something last minute, maybe we will. I think we’ll likely figure something out, but we are not focused on it right now. It’s quite a relief.
It’s important to both of us to be married in the Catholic Church with the support and foundation that provides. That’s the most important thing to us. If our plans don’t live up to others’ expectations, oh well! No one will be holding a gun to their head to attend.
Post # 6
That’s great that you picked out the part that means the most to the both of you.