Post # 1
Newbie “waiting lady” here. I have been lurking around for some time and have been so moved by the wonderful comments and interactions that I felt maybe I should give it try.
My boyfriend is perfect — he really is. Loving, educated, warm, charming and always willing to put my or our needs first. We’ve been together for nearly two years in May and moved in with each other about nine months ago. It’s been bliss! I can’t believe I’m going to say it but I enjoy washing his socks and coming home to him playing Wii and making us hot chocolate. The simple things in life — who knew?
My father passed away unexpectedly last November and my SO was my savior. He became my bestfriend, my counselor, maid, chauffer…anything I needed in my grief and I know how BLESSED I am to have him.
Now, I’m 33 — turning 34 in March — and will be celebrating my birthday on a cruise to the Western Carribean with my SO (SO is 41, never married). We talk about marriage and children ALL THE TIME and he knows the ring I’d like.
Since our first anniversary I’ve been on the wait — perhaps too soon, now sure.So that means I’ve been anxious through Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, and soon to be Valentine’s Day…
Anyhoo, with the cruise approaching in a month or so, I’m wondering how NOT to get psyched up for a proposal and just enjoy the trip. Any suggestions for the hopelessly waiting?
Thanks in advance!
Post # 3
First of all, welcome! I’m glad you decided to join 🙂 Sounds like you have a great guy and it’s only a matter of time. Good for you! Definitely keep us updated on what happens.
This is such a tough one though!!! AH! It sounds promising, but I totally understand how you don’t want to get all worked up — possibly to be disappointed :/
I don’t know where you’re from, but where I live there are several inches of snow on the ground … so maybe you can just focus on being somewhere WARM! 😉
I’m not sure I have any true advice for you, just letting you know you’re totally not alone.. I actually think another memeber, deathbydesign, is going on a trip to Mexico very soon and thinks a proposal is going to happen.. Here is her thread about it
Good luck and enjoy yourself! Either way, it will be an amazing vacation!
Post # 4
Welcome and the cruise sounds like a perfect time- hope it happens then!!!
Post # 5
That would be so romantic if he proposes on the cruise! Unfortunately I have no advice to give you about making the wait easier, at this point I’m just rolling with it. 🙂 Good luck and welcome!
Post # 6
Welcome!! I don’t know what to tell you to do to not get worked up because I’m still trying to figure out myself! My SO & I are going on a cruise the week of V-Day & I am SOOOOO hoping that it happens then!
Here’s to both of us getting vaca proposals!! :o)
Post # 7
@chastetiltuesday: i think most of us go through that on every holiday/birthday/romantic gesture! i am getting that way about v- day even though i know the chances are slim to none. i just can’t help it! i totally understand. the problem with hoping it’ll come on this date or that date, is the dissapointment when it doesn’t
Post # 8
Hey -first I’d like to wish you good luck for a great cruise, regardless of whether it inlcudes a small jewelry box presented n one knee. Now, I’d like to pass on a friend’s advice for helping get through some of the proposable holidays/events. You need to let your SO know that under no circumstances should he ever get you a gift in a small, ring-sized box… Unless it’s an e-ring. Otherwise, as a lady who’s waiting, of course you will feel that sting of disappointment even when the gift could still be pretty awesome and lovely (earrings coem in the same size box sometimes). This rule helped my friend and her now husband get trhough 8 years while they finished school and started careers before getting married.
I know this won’t help with the anticipation and hoping before Vday and your cruise, but it can help you not get your expectations up really high (through no fault of his other than to pick something in the wrong sized box) only to have the urge to cry when you see an expensive pair of diamond earrings or the like, which he won’t understand.
Until then, practice NOT thinking about it as much as you can, make up your mind to have a great time regardless of what happens, and realize that even when men have no qualms about proposing in the absolute best case scenario, small things can throw off their plans, cold feet can strike, or soemthing unexpected can make him hold off and wait till he feels it’ll be “perfect”. Men feel a lot of pressure to make the proposal grandchild-story-worthy, so even something as small as an unepxected rainshower could ruin his plans, making him wait till the next holiday/special day for you guys. How about you spend your time looking for great get-away dresses and clothes/swimsuits when you feel the “OMG will he? Won’t he?” questions take over? Go to a spa or salon to get cruise-ready 🙂 Anyhting to distract yourself.
Post # 9
Just want to say THANK YOU to everyone for your wonderful words of encouragement. I think I’m going to follow @Isilme advice to just distract myself with other things — spa day at sea on my birthday is a GREAT way to stop thinking about engagements AND horrible Northeast snowstorms! Thanks again, all!
Post # 10
@Impatiently waiting: Meeee too. He planned a “surprise dinner” for V-day and even though I’m 99% sure he hasn’t even gotten a ring, part of me can’t help but hope that this is it! Boo…