(Closed) With your best non-bridal brain:What would you think if…(late invite question)

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Hi  I totally think it would be okay – especially if you have a pretty casual relationship with them.  But if you had an extra inivte that might be nice 🙂

Post # 4
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

Since they are both boys they will probably think nothing of it : ) A free meal and free booze are much more important to them than ettiquette!  As long as you phrase it properly I think they would be happy to be invited.

Post # 5
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I verbally invited a few people a couple of weeks before our wedding.

It was a situation where they are friends of friends. We ran into them out one night and we were like, "WE SHOULD HAVE INVITED YOU!! Do you want to come?"

They were very happy to join us and not offended by the verbal invite at all.

Post # 6
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’d be fine with the invite.  You just have to make sure you express to them that this wasn’t a “you’re on the B list” kinda thing.  I’m sure they’ll be happy to attend.

Post # 7
Member
271 posts
Helper bee

This happened to me.  My ex-boyfriend’s sister was getting married, she had the room and called to ask if I wanted to come about a month before.  I was so flattered to be invited I didn’t care that she called.  She did follow up with an invite though.  So if you have one to spare I would send it or hand deliver. PS I’m not a bride so that’s a true non-bride brain answer! Wink

Post # 8
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I am a super weird person about these kinds of things. Let me get that out in the open before hand. So, you know, I’m totally cool with you ignoring my advice.

But yes, I would not like it as a potential wedding guest. I would feel like an after thought and I wouldn’t go. And I can tell you this for sure because I’ve had it happen to me with friend’s parties and such and that is my exact reaction.

So yeah, I am weird about invites. That’s the straight truth. And I’m fine with people diagreeing with me. But personally, that’s how I am.

Post # 9
Member
468 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

You could always call and do the old “Just checking in because we didn’t receive your response card” trick, or say that the invitation was just returned in the mail if you really, really think the people will be offended. But, I do agree with the PP who said that guys don’t really care about etiquette, so a verbal invitation should suffice.

Post # 10
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

I would feel like I wasn’t really wanted. But that’s just me, my friend invited her roommates from college that were on the “B list” and they were happy to get the invite last minute and came to the wedding.

Post # 11
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@tootietoo2: ha, that was my first thought too!

i agree that men probably don’t care as much about this, and wouldn’t think much of it. make sure to specify if you are inviting them with a plus one or not though.

Post # 12
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Honestly? I just think that it can’t hurt to ask 🙂

Post # 13
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Honestly, I would be offended.  Simply because it’s kind of offensive to be told your an “oversight.”  I know that’s not how you meant it, but you know how people are – they interpret things differently.  I think if you’re set on really inviting them, then I would give them an actual invite not just a verbal one.  Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
875 posts
Busy bee

I think it sounds like it would be okay!  But don’t invite them if you think it’s going to cause any drama!

Post # 15
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I received a last minute verbal invitation like this once!  I was in a class with the bride and groom at church – we got to know each other pretty well over the course of the class and they said one night that they had some extra room at the wedding and would I like to come?  I was flattered!!  Definitely invite these people.  Just be honest with them.  If they are truly happy for you and your FI, they will be delighted to come.

Post # 16
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

i have been verbally invited to a wedding.. i didnt mind it but if u do have an extra invite its preferrable

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