- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2018
I don’t know where to post this, but I guess this will do.
My grandfather is 90 (almost 91). Generally he’s in pretty good health. Only takes one pill a day for indigestion, and doesn’t wear dentures (all his own teeth). He’s good on his feet, totally with it, though he is getting a bit forgetful (meh, he’s 90). His hearing is going a bit but he only wears glasses to read. He still walks into town every other day, a 20 minute walk.
Today I just feel so sorry for him. I had to take him to the doctor to have a cist removed. Without going into too much info he now has a hole in his back that will need to be packed and dressed everyday for the next week. We’re allowed to skip Christmas day though. At his age, even a little upheaval tires him out – I think he can be forgiven. Because it’s Christmas only A&E (ER) will be able to do it for him on Christmas Eve, Boxing Day and Tuesday (Bank holidays). And he’ll still have to go to his local surgery on the other days. Today he went to bed at 7 when normally it’s after 10.30 because he’s so worn out from the half hour he spent at the doctors plus all the getting there and back.
I know I should be glad that he’s here, and as I say in pretty good health. He’s lucky to still have his wife and they live in their home (up one flight of stairs!) and not a care home. I just realised his mortality today. The doctor called me in to talk about the care he’ll need and he looked so helpless.
I felt so embarrassed and I hate that now I (along with the rest of our family) have to be responsible for him, even though he is and always has been so independant. I was fortunate that my parents ran a home for the elderly when I was younger so I’ve always been pretty good with different generations but it’s so difficult that he’s an adult yet I need to look after him, or at least keep an eye out. He know’s what’s going on and I don’t want to patronise him. People always forget this, and brush his ways off with “oh, he’s 90, he’s no idea what’s going on”. Yes he’s old, but he’s not stupid.
I don’t know why I wanted to share this. But I just don’t know how long he has left with us. I’m a Waitingbee, and naturally I want him be at my wedding. But at the very least I want him to know that my SO loves me, and that we plan to get married.