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OMG I would never show up at a wedding in costume unless prompted to do so - even if it were on Halloween (wow what fun!). Just treat everything normally. Those that wonder will call and ask.
I would never show up at a halloween wedding in a halloween costume unless it said specifically on the invitation that it was meant to be a costume party - even then I'd feel like an idiot.
avoid the color scheme of black and orange on your invites :-) that is the first step!
(my real answer is that unless you write costumes on there, no one will wear one - no one wants to be that a$$hole wearing a bumblebee suit in a room full of tuxedos and gowns)
Yeah, I can't imagine people would automatically assume it's a costume party just because it's on 10/31. I would never wear a costume to a 10/31 wedding unless it were explicitly specified that I should do so. At most, I'd wear a pin or a scarf in Halloween or fall theme, but even that...I don't know. No one wants to be the only one in costume at a non-costume party.
I would stay away from any orange & black!
And do you have a wedding website? maybe put it on there!
I agree with the PPs - no one will wear a costume so there is no need to put anything on the invites about it.
Do you want people to dress up a little? Like a masquerade ball?
I agree with the PP's that people wont automatically think an event on Halloween is a costume party, especially if it is a wedding.
Maybe just include a dress code either on your invitations or on your wedding website. Say "cocktail attire" or "black tie optional" if that's what you want. Then people will understand to just dress like they normally do for a wedding, and not to wear a costume!
You really shouldn't put anything and trust that adults will actually act like adults (hence dress like adults) at a social setting. Unless your telling people it's a Halloween wedding, I don't see why people would show up in costumes? (If we're going to go all Emily Post, the only time it's really okay to write a dress code is if you say black-tie or black tie optional lol). Good luck!
I think your invites will set the mood. If they had a distinctly Halloween feel to them then I could see why you'd be worried but really I don't think most people would even consider dressing up (in fact on Four Weddings a bride had a Halloween wedding and ASKED people to dress up but no one did). I think most people would avoid it because they'd be concerned they'd be the only one in costume.
@jacqi-just dressing up for a wedding. i don't even want jeans lol! maybe for reception for dancing so people can get down lol.
thanks everyone for the advice. i appriciate it very, very much! x
Invites should never mention a dress code. Also, the bride and groom cannot dictate the attire without being rude. That said, word of mouth is the best route.
I think that as long as your invites are not at all "Halloween-y" (including color scheme, graphics, motif, language, etc) then nobody will even consider showing up in costume. I agree with other posters that invites shouldn't mention dress code.
@Goldilocks1107: I agree with goldilocks, I'd list it. It's nice to assume that your guests will automatically understand something, but in all honesty, they won't. They'll do stupid things, like text you an hour before your wedding, asking you for directions. Seriously, people just don't think. Sometimes you have to spell it out for them and since you're having a wedding on a holiday where people dress up in costume, I think it would be more than appropriate to list "cocktail attire" on your invites so that they understand it's not a costume party. :)
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my wedding date is oct. 31st. i don't want it to be an all out costume party-i want elegance, not a mockery. i don't know what i should put on invites or not put on invites. i would assume that if i didn't have a sentence saying come in costume-people would get the hint.