Work Advice? Snarky Email

posted 3 years ago in Career
Post # 3
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@sugarcube:  Instead of emailing him back I would have apologized in person. he can’t ignore you that way. I would go up to him Monday and just say hey I want to apologize again for leaving you off the email Originally. Thanks for all your help with implementing the fix, I appreciate it.

Post # 4
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

It probably would’ve been better to resend the entire email to everyone with no mention of forgetting people instead of pointing out the fact to Jim that you forgot him a whole day later. It probably would’ve also been helpful to mention who was responsible for the fix in the email, becuase if I got one just from you then I would assume that you were the one responsible and no one else!

First off I don’t think anyone needs to maintain a relationship with a coworker simply because he signs off on your things – that is his job. Unless he allows this to interfere with your work then it isn’t that big of deal he isn’t really speaking to you unless he needs to. If he doesn’t sign off on your work that is when you start speaking to supervisors about his behaviour, but to me it sounds like he just doesn’t want to be a friend to you.

I would see him in person and just add that you are sorry if you offended him – an email isn’t very personal at all.

Post # 7
Member
689 posts
Busy bee

He sounds like a dick. I’ve worked w/ someone like this before, and there’s nothing you can do to please him bc he’s a dick. Don’t get yourself worked up about this bc nothing u do will make him feel “better,” as if he has anything to be angry about anyway. U apologized. Done. Over with. If he continues to be a jerk and ignore u when u send him something he needs to do for you, then go speak to him and see what’s up.

Post # 8
Member
5277 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

@sugarcube:  Do not look at it as a confrontation, it shouldn’t be.  As a professional you are expected to fluently relate at all levels within your organization and have the company’s/employees interests as a priority during interactions.  Not all the interactions will be a walk in the park, but you must remain calm and collected regardless.  Personal feelings must be left out, precisely because sometimes you need to relate to individuals you don’t like at a personal level and vice versa.  This is core if you want to grow and land leadership positions.

I agree with previous PP that you should apologize in person, do not overapologize, just express you are sorry for not including him in your email and thank him again for his contribution.  As for his limited contribution, it is good to always recognize everyone included in a project/decision making process regardless of the size of each individual’s contribution.  Courtesy goes a long way in the corporate world.

Post # 10
Member
4440 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would have CCd bob and jim and sent the email to whoever needed it. But what’s done is done. Apologize in persoN and explain that the email wasn’t meant for “us” since we knew the procedure. 

Post # 11
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

It was a group project and you took all the credit for it. I’d be pissed, too. If he is a superior and signs off for you, I think that was a huge mistake. I hate the “it was all my idea anyway” attitude when working on a team. It’s political in an office and forgetting to copy the people who you worked with is a big mistake. 

I’d apologize in person, especially if you want to advance. 

Post # 12
Member
5277 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

@sugarcube:  You’re welcome.  Developing a corporate mind set takes some time, but you’ll get there.  I’m an emotional person too.  You know what helped me?  I had mentors; people in higher positions that I admired and sought their advise.  Observe how successful people around you manage work relationships and you’ll learn a lot.  Keep being excellent at what you do, trust your instincts and be open to learn.  I wish you the best!

Post # 15
Member
529 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Do NOT apologize again-in person or via email! You already apologized, and I’ve worked with this personality before-the more you try to smooth things over, the less he will respect you and think that he is right/superior. Let it go. It was an honest mistake, and either there’s more to the story (perhaps he told a higher up that he did all the work to find/implement a solution and now he feels like being off the email exposes his lie) or he is really and truly a delusional prick. Either way, don’t buy into the crazy. You apologized-it’s done.

He may still choose to ignore you, and that’s fine and there’s likely nothing you can do about it with a personality like his. You’re not always going to have everyone like you, and sometimes it won’t be your fault. If he refuses to sign-off, or delays the signature, then you have a problem and you need to discuss that he is letting his personal feelings interfere with his ability to do his job. I doubt it’ll come to that. Just go in tomorrow and act like everything is fine, don’t feed into the bull and act like you commited a grave offense that needs to be apologized for-you didn’t, he’s a jerk, leave it be.

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