Post # 1
I am up working on my wedding vows tonight but I don’t want them to be longer than a minute or two…if that…maybe a paragraph. I am struggling…not b/c I don’t have enough to say but b/c I have too much!!!
ARRGGHHH!!! This is driving me nuts!! How can I condense 3 years of good lovin’ into one paragraph…suggestions?
Post # 3
Oh my gosh, that’s so hard! This is why I don’t think I can do that. I mean I would love to be able to do my own vows, but I would never be able to decide what to write!!! Good luck!!
Post # 4
What’s the rush? This is a hugely important part of the entire day! If you are worried about memorizing the vows, your officiant can give you a cheat sheet. One thing you might consider, celebrants trained through the celebrant foundation and institute often use a narrative of the bride and groom’s love story, as an early part of the ceremony. Perhaps you could have a similarly fashioned narrative that would hit some of high points that you’d prefer not to include in the ceremony.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
Oh no, good luck!! This is exactly why we aren’t writing ours. 😉
Post # 6
@honeybun…I am staring at this monologue I wrote and thinking…this is not going to work =) I have my work cut out for me. I still can’t believe my FI has his written and memorized already.
@Sarah…we both want the traditional wedding vows as well…our vows to each other are more “icing on the cake” rather than a replacement for the traditional vows. So we agreed to keep it within 2 minutes each.
@spaniel…at first I wasn’t going to…but since my FI has managed to plan our DW, write his vows and memorize them while working 2 jobs and going to school for his PhD, I would feel kind of bad about not having written/memorized any…even though I am a single mom with a career and it’s performance review time at work.
*sighs* I am going to have to refine and refine again in these 34 days we have left.
Post # 7
We wrote ours a few months ago because our pastor gave it to us as homework for our pre-marital. Just keep trying!!!
Post # 8
Here is my first pass….hopefully when I look at them again tomorrow I will still like them enough to keep most of it =)
Mr JamaicaBride, as the poet Barbara De Angelis said, “Love is a choice you make from moment to moment”. In this moment and all of the moments in the future, I choose you. You are the most generous, loving, strong, and supportive man I know. I fell in love with you so quickly and that love has only grown and flourished throughout our three years together. The way that you love your family, the way that you love, protect, and care for your sons, the way that you love me and my daughter shows your generosity and your loving spirit. The way that you fought so hard and bravely for life when you were battling cancer, despite the pain and anguish it caused you, showed me the depth of your strength. I feel very blessed to have you in my life and to stand with you in this beautiful place and join my life to yours for the rest of our lives. Mr JamaicaBride, I promise to love you, to pray with you, to share my dreams with you, to build a family with you, and to remain committed to the promises that we are making to each other…today and every day, for the rest of our lives.
Post # 9
@Jamaica Bride – Start brainstorming and write something, and then edit it down a bit. Two minutes of talking can fit a good page of writing in it, so you have a lot of space to go. If it gets too mushy, or you have to cut it, consider writing it in a card to give him before the ceremony as well. Think of special reasons that you love each other, and any special promises that you may want to make and build on in your relationship together. And, if you need help, reach out to close friends or your bridal party to read them and offer suggestions – sometimes, reading the same information over and over, you can get a bit stuck, and it can help to have a fresh look at them with someone else.
But most of all, don’t worry! They’re going to be beautiful and special, no matter what. And that’s what’s most important.
PS: I wrote that before reading the whole thread, and saw that you had a draft up there already – I love them! I think they’re sweet, heartfelt, simple, and perfect.
Post # 10
great job!! i think that perhaps you should think about the things that you love the most about him and list a few of them. your vows are very poignant and to the point, but i think you may want them to be a bit longer?
Post # 11
@jessiblum…all good suggestions. There is no bridal party though…just FI, his best friend and I. My best friend couldn’t make it but that’s fine.
@crebre…I am thinking longer. I worked on them a little bit more last night. I told myself that I am going to look at them once a day..that’s it =) If I knew something about the ceremony I would have a better idea about length and things but alas…the FI is adamant that everything be a suprise for me. It’s very cool, very sweet, but frustrating at the same time….oh well we are almost on the last month.
Post # 12
@JamaicaBride, even if your best friend can’t be there, she can still help you with your vows before. Another suggestion, if you’re worried about them not matching up for length or content, is to find a neutral third person who can take a look at both sets of vows before hand. I often do this for my couples, I’m not sure if it’s something your officiant could help you out with. Maybe a friend?