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Worried about money!

posted 2 years ago in Money
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    tobemurphy10    October 10, 2010   MA

    Currently my Fi and I live in a house owned from his parents with his two friends. The agreement was that we would eventually buy it from them, but it is out of our price range. (the only reason we are able to afford it right now is with the help of his friends) However, one of them moved out this weekend and with less that 2 days notice and I am totally freaked out financially!

    I have voiced this to my FI a couple of times, but he tries to tell me everything will be ok and that we will just work more details and overtime. But the reality is I want to be able to see my Husband and if we are both working all the time, this won't happen. We just cannot afford the house/bills and need to look at other locations.

    I finally broke down in front of him and informed his parents of my major concern. (Which I was nervous about bc they own the house and I was worried they would be upset) They understand how I am worried, but the FI was a little different, I had to take a little longer explaining my side and I think the reality of the situation caught up to him. So now we are looking for houses. The realism of being an adult has caught up to me and I do not like it! I can't sleep. I have become obsessed with how much I am spending/saving. I just can't stop thinking numbers. I am slowly going insane!

     
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    cherryblossom80    August 21, 2010   NY

    You probably can afford it if you cut some expenses and  make some changes. FH's sister is an inspiration to me because she is a stay at home mom with two kids, two almost brand new cards, two houses (one that she rents) and the entire family goes on vacation to Europe and Myrtle Beach every year. Her husband makes $22,000 a year. It 's not about how much you make, it's about how far you are able to stretch out your money. With two people working full-time I am sure you can do it. Read some books on frugal living--there's really so many things you probably are overspending on and don't even realize.

     
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    Breezy    October 10, 2010   Guam

    Don't worry fellow 10.10.10 bride! Make good decisions as they present themselves and all the little ones will carry into the big ones. You can only do what can be done today. The future will always come, whether you fret about it or not. In the end you will end up living with your man where you were meant to be :)

     
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    twalila    May 2010   Ohio

    @cherryblossom - Woah!!  Your FSIL is incredible!!  My RENT ALONE is over $22k/yr.  I know there are areas I could cut back on, but I'd love to know some of her secrets!

     

     
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    LoriLori    July 24, 2010   Long Beach Island, NJ

    @twalila - although I agree that cherryblossom's FSIL is amazing I am 100% positive that she doesn't live in the tri-state area!  My mortgage is almost double of that $22K salary so I feel your pain.  whn i see what people in other areas can buy for a certain amount i just about DIE!  It's SO-O-O-O expensive here!

    but I'd love some tips too! 

     
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    MissAsB    June 6, 2009   Married in CO, Living in AL

    Honestly, I think that you should look for somewhere else to live.  You shouldn't be scraping to afford the house and it sounds like you probably wouldn't be able to afford buying it from them anyway.  There are a lot of houses out there for rent right now and I'm sure you can find something that is more comfortably in your price range.  You can buy the house from them later if you have the money and really want it.  I think it's great that some people can like cherryblossom's SIL but I don't think that most people can really pull off that kind of discipline.  It would be like going on a massive diet and I know personally that I would be so hungry!

     
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    bluebook    February 13, 2010   Miami, Florida

    Also, I don't know where you are, but you might look into renting an apartment. Just try to lower your rent as much as possible, in a way that isn't going to cost you more in commuting.  Rent is the biggest fixed cost for most people, so if you lower that, you'll be able to put that right into your savings.

     
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    tobemurphy10    October 10, 2010   MA

    @cherryblossom: your sister in law is very lucky. Not only would we be purchasing the house out of our range, we would be in debt to his parents another 100,000 to be paid basically for our lifetime. Just not going to work!

    Unfortunately for us, together we make a little more than the mortgage would be on top of bills it is just not possible. MA is soo expensive! I have tossed around the idea about renting/getting a condo something little for us with the ability to save. He doesn't want to rent and he doesn't want to live in the condo and deal with people being on each side of our place. Although I do have to say to my delight, he is coming around more to different ideas. This is just a work in progress.

     
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    LatteLove    June 19, 2009   Chicago/San Diego

    It's really hard not to obsess about numbers when it seems like your life revolves around them!  I feel the same way--especially since I handle the 'book work' of our finances.  I'm always second guessing my decisions with our money!

    I'm glad you both were able to agree that you need to look to start with something more affordable.  Hope the search proves quick and successful!

     
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    MrsK2be    November 15, 2008   Ohio

    @ cherryblossom - WOW! Are you sure?!! That doesn't even seem feasible!  I want to know how..HOW!!!?!?!

     
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    jrswiggy    9/18/2010   Ohio

    I think you are making a smart and responsible decision by realizing your FI's parent's house is not something you can afford....at least not right now. You don't want to be house poor and have to rely on overtime to make the bills. Money sucks. My FI has been in and out of jobs since last May after he was laid off and we have experienced living on one income. If you don't HAVE to be in the position of barely making ends meet, don't put yourself there. You want to have money to do fun stuff and enjoy each other. I know you both can find a great place to start out at, and in the future buy what you want in a comfortable price range:)

     

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