Post # 1
DH and I took a vacation to Miami this weekend and left our 6 month old DS with my ILs. He had a blast. Every report was that he was smiley, playing, sleeping, eating, being all around awesome.
We get home late Monday night and he’s already alseep. Tuesday morning he’s distant and lethargic, but I figure it was because he was so tired from the weekend and I had to wake him for daycare because my ILs threw him off his schedule. Tuesday night he won’t smile or play with DH and I as usual. He just kinda sits there and stares at us. He still eats dinner and has his bottle, but he has an awful night sleep. He keeps waking up with a stuffy nose and whining/moaning.
Wednesday I take him to daycare and tell them about his crappy night. At noon, they call me and said I have to pick him up because he has a fever. I take him to the Dr yesterday morning and he has a RAGING ear infection. The Dr said it must be very painful because it’s very irritated. She couldn’t believe that he hasn’t been screaming his lungs off.
I feel so so so bad. I ignored the signs that he was sick and just assumed he was mad at us for leaving town (like a 6 month old is even capable of that!) My poor sweet boy was in pain and was still trying to be such a good boy and not crying or screaming. He just looked so sad. I feel like a horrible parent.
I’m sure this won’t be the last time….
What have you done that made you feel like the worst parent ever?
Post # 2
ExcitedScaredBee: I opened a door into my toddler son’s head, knocking him to the floor and giving him a HUGE bump on his forehead. He looked like someone had smacked him with a baseball bat. He cried like mad for a few minutes and then acted as if nothing had happened, but the bruise was there for like a week to make me feel extra guilty. Please don’t feel bad about not realizing your son was sick! It’s so hard to tell with babies, and it wasn’t unreasonable for you to think that he was tired and out of sorts from the weekend of fun.
Post # 3
Not me (though I am sure I will do a million things wrong) but my SIL said she feels like the worst parent ever. she woke up one morning and her 14 month old had a droopy ear from a bad ear infection she never caught. He had to have surgery and everything. Fast forward to a few weeks later and it happened again. They are monitoring him very closely now but everyone agrees…… He is such a happy baby (never cries or screams, always slept through the night) and they just think he doesn’t know how to complain. They even tested him to make sure he can feel pain.
But of course she feels like she should be able to catch it anyway. So don’t be too hard on yourself!
Post # 4
Um, I have a 7 month old son and I constantly feel like a failure. He’s had a cold for 3 months since he started at daycare, three ear infections, chokes on his food constantly, I’m always getting the temperature wrong in his room and he’s too cold or hot in the middle of the night (no thermostat), the list goes on. I can’t believe there aren’t mandatory classes for new parents, lol!
Post # 5
i wanted to go to a concert with a friend last night (had given her the ticket for Xmas), but she forgot about it and made other plans, so I decided to go with DH. It was our first time going out at night together!
We planned on bringing DD to bed ourselves and only having my mum go in to place the pack back into her mouth and such and be back the first time she usually wakes up hungry.
Well – as DH says my breast smelled like freedom lol. So of course she didn’t go to sleep. Eventually we decided to have my mum try it. (DD loves my mum and is fine spending time with her, but at night it’s even difficult for DH to bring her to bed, that is totally mummy-time for her.) she really cried quite hard (but then again with my daughter, there is no “soft crying” haha) and when I went into the bedroom to take over, my mum sent me back outside because she felt it was getting better. We waited in front of the door, didn’t hear anything anymore so eventually decided to leave for the concert before we’d miss the whole thing.
DD was fine then, she had fallen asleep before we left and didn’t wake up at all. But still we were feeling guilty for having left.
Post # 6
I dropped him, at about 2-3 months old. I still feel terrible just talking about it. You know those first 2 months when you feed them every 2-3 hours like clockwork and you feel like you’re slowly going insane due to lack of sleep? Yeah, that was me at 2am one night while I was burping him, I was so tired I could almost cry, so I decided to burp him while I sat on the edge of my bed. Apparently I fell asleep sitting up and in those couple of seconds I dozed off. my arm relaxed and he fell right out of my arms. I opened my eyes the instant I felt my arms relaxed but it was too late and he fell. I was in shock but I quickly picked him up, he cried so hard, but after a couple of minutes he stopped and was fine, we checked him all over to make sure he was fine. I cried all night and made an appt with the dr that same morning, he was fine of course but we had to bring him back the following day and we kept an eye on him for ANY strange bahevior. I haven’t told anyone anout it other then Dh and my MIL. But yeah, I felt like crap for a long time.
Post # 7
ExcitedScaredBee: I don’t have a baby yet, but my mom always complains that I was a screamer… guess it kept her from missing my ear infections though!
Seriously though, that’s not your fault, I had no idea where your post was going, I never would have thought that he would be sick!
Post # 8
ExcitedScaredBee: Don’t be too hard on yourself. Until he developed the fever, there really no symptoms that would indicate a need to see a doctor.Even then, many doctors are no longer treating all ear infections.
I worked with an RN in ER who waited 3 days after an injury to bring her son in with broken arm. She thought he was being over dramatic.
Post # 9
The same thing happened to me. My son was not his smiley self for a few days and was waking up in the middle of the night. He finally got a fever and we took him to the urgent care and found out he had the worst ear infection. The doctor said the same thing that he could not believe he was not screaming. Now we know if he is not acting right something is wrong. My son had so many reaccuring ear infections that we had to get tubes in his ear. He has been good ever since. Parenting is a learning expericance so don’t feel bad.
Post # 10
I wouldn’t even know how to detect an ear infection so that makes me a horrible mom in itself…. But things that have made me feel like a bad mom already and my son is only 3 months old…
1. I didnt have any experience with babies before Ace so I never knew how important burping was and how much gas a baby can have so for a couple of days my baby would cry and cry and I didn’t understand why until I finally read up on it….. Such an easy fix for him being in so much pain!!
2. I got a really bad cold and tried to be so careful not to spread it though I EBF but I read the best thing to do is keep BF. Well he caught the cold right as I was just getting over mine… Felt so bad giving him my cold and watching him be miserable while I was getting better. Ugh!!!
3. i keep giving him scratches on his legs from my wedding rings! He doesn’t cry or notice but I see one from time to time and I feel horrible about it.
Post # 11
moderndaisy: thats so funny!! I think the same thing! I keep telling DH it was harder for me to get my driver’s license than a baby! I mean you have to take a written and practical exam… For a baby you have to just have a car seat installed!
Post # 12
My girls were playing in the living room and I called them to come to the kitchen for lunch. My younger one came immediately, but the 10 year old didn’t. I called her a couple more times. I figured she was just goofing off, so I go in there about to yell for ignoring me…. and she is on the floor having a seizure. Of course I know I didn’t cause it- but I felt bad! Every mom does something where they feel like the worst mom.
Post # 13
ExcitedScaredBee: When I was 2 my mom went to answer the phone and I fell out through the window when she wasn’t looking. These things happen. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Just think you’ll know if it happens again.
Post # 14
The first time I ever tried to cut my baby’s fingernails, OF COURSE I clipped the end of her finger instead. What’s funny is that since then, I have never managed to cut her again … but of course it had to happen the first time I ever did it. It bled for soooo long; her bib looked like she’d just murdered someone. 🙁
Post # 15
ExcitedScaredBee: We all have been there where we feel like the worst mom ever. It only gets worse before it gets better. Many times of my son’s 2.5 years so far I have felt that way.