Would this annoy you…

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I think I’d be annoyed.

Post # 4
Member
168 posts
Blushing bee

Um, yeah that would annoy me! Personally, my guy and I love spending time with each other.  We are both busy with set schedules.  I’d be upset that he didn’t contact me or check in at least.

His behavior seems shady to me.

Post # 5
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yes, I would be more than annoyed – I would be mad.

Post # 6
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’d be super annoyed. He was just plain rude and insensitive. Try not to let it ruin your night together tonight though! 

Post # 7
Member
3084 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Daizy914:  I would be annoyed too. Since he was supposed to be home earlier, he should have let you know where he was. What if something happened to him and you were worried? That’s completely unacceptable. I would be really annoyed if thought that my husband was going to be home at 8:30-9 and he wasn’t still home at 10 and I had to be the one to text HIM about where he was. It’s called being respectful. 

Post # 9
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Daizy914:  Good luck darlin! Stand firm and make sure he knows why you’re upset. Hugs!

Post # 10
Member
425 posts
Helper bee

Sorry to hear this :/ Yeah I’d be annoyed if I were in your shoes too.

Maybe in the future you can ask him what his plans are specifically? Or tell him beforehand that you’re hoping to get x time together?

Post # 11
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2005

I would be super upset. It’s not about the going out it’s about the being insensitive and ignoring your feelings. I don’t think you’re being petty or childish at all. 

Now, having said that we are all human and have all done something to hurt our SO’s feelings without intending it. So, I am not trying to make him look like the bad guy here. 

I think you do need to address it though, it was not fair and you don’t want to be doormat. I would just talk to him about how it made you feel. Let him know that it made you feel like he didn’t want to spend time with you and that it made you feel like your emotions were not important. My guess is he has no idea that what he did was really wrong. 

Post # 12
Member
771 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@Daizy914:  I’d be upset. He is probably in “boy time” mode already But doesn’t mean it’s right. The thing that bothers me about stuff like that is I feel people do what they want for the most part. Like I/you shouldn’t have to beg/remind. They should just want to see their SO knowing they will be gone for a bit And it should be common sense to come home.

Post # 13
Member
2871 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My FI did this one day where we didn’t get to see eachother much.  He went to a Hockey game and then went to his dad’s house to watch a football game.  Instead of texting, I called.  For us, it was a brief conversation of “I haven’t seen you all weekend, can you come home?”  He got it pretty quickly.  Some times texts just can’t express it.

The only take away for the future would be setting up the expectation ahead of time with your DH about spending time together.  Sometimes guys just don’t get it, and need that brick to hit them over the head.

Post # 14
Member
3338 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I would be annoyed. He did the exact opposite of what he said he would do. I think it was a bit selfish of him 🙁

Post # 15
Member
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@Daizy914:  Ugh, that would annoy me as well. Did I read that right? You expected him home betwen 8:30-9 and at 10, you texted him to see what was going on and it was at that point he told you he was going to his friends house? He should have texted you at 7:30PM (OR EARLIER) to let you know he wasn’t coming home right away.  It’s just common courtesy. I’m assuming him and his friend made these plans to hang out sometime during the day so he had plenty of time to give you a heads up.

He honestly probably doesn’t see the big issue. Which is probably a bit hurtful because you probably feel like you’re the only ones who cares if you spend time together before he leaves 🙁 And also, if my SO ignored my msg’s until 1AM, there would be hell to pay. It would just seem so out of chracter for either of us to do that, so it’s hard for me to not get upset when I read about someone doing that. I just don’t think there’s  ever any reason to ever flat out ignore and disprespect each other like that (especially when someone is feeling hurt)

In the future, if you want to hang out with him before he leaves, I would just tell him that. Just let him know that you are hoping to spend time together Monday and Tuesday evening because you’re going to miss him while he’s away. That way, he knows for sure and there isn’t any confusion. And as for right now, I would just let him know that you’re feeling hurt and angry. Let him know exactly why.

Post # 16
Member
8419 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Daizy914:  I’d be upset and weirded out if my husband did this, however we do everything together (he races home to be with me).  Maybe your husband just likes more time to do his own thing and doesn’t realize he’s being insensitive.

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