Post # 46
One of my former employee’s is Melinda, but everyone else calls her Mindy. She even refers to herself as Mindy about 3/4 of the time. We have worked for the same company for 5 years, and I am just now coming around to calling her Mindy–occasionally! I think it’s more a matter of not being 100% sure of the formality within an office, the particular person’s preference for the nickname and just becoming more used to be around someone and seeing how they fit their name. I still can’t see Melinda as a Mindy, but that’s MY deal, haha.
i would not give this a second thought.
Post # 47
Once again, I want to thank everyone for taking the time to reply. Some bees suggested I just ask him about it, and after thinking this through, I decided that’s probably the best because if I didn’t, it would probably continue to eat away at me, no matter how much anyone tells me that it’s no big deal. I knew they were all making plans to go out for lunch one day this week, so I asked him if they ever decided where they were going to go because I was hoping he would bring Samantha/Sam up instead of me just coming out of the blue and saying “why did you randomly start calling her Sam?”
He told me they did decide on a place and he went on about work for a bit before finally mentioning her name (calling her Sam), and I sort of casually said “I’ve been meaning to ask you… how come you call her Sam now? Does she not like being called Samantha?”
He said “idk, everyone seems to call her Sam and she doesn’t seem to mind. It’s just easier to say I guess.” He then asked why I asked, and I was tempted to brush it off as a “oh I was just wondering” kind of thing, but I actually confessed to feeling insecure and just kind of explained that I knew it had more to do with my ex than it did with him, and that he didn’t do anything wrong. He reassured me everything is fine and he did say that if I ever feel like this about something else, to just ask right away instead of waiting. He knows how these things can eat away at me and he does know that I have trust/insecurity issues due to an ex, so he’s done his best to make sure I always feel like nothing is wrong.
To be honest, I think the fact he works so closely with women on his team probably freaked me out since at his old job, there were only a few women in the whole building and his entire team was made up of men. I was probably just sort of “waiting” for something to happen, and I went way over the top with the nickname thing.
Post # 48
I disagree with another poster who states that if anything is bothering you, that you should bring it up to your husband. There are some things that you gotta ask friends or your girls about (or, like in this post) IF you are aware that you have had an issue (like this insecurity issue you have for instance) that may be unsubstantiated or based on your paranoia if your man has given you no reason to be. Do NOT question him on why he is now calling Samantha ‘Sam’. This is not a ‘gut’ instinct that something is going on. In fact, you snooped through his phone and found absolutely nothing. I suspect this is not the first go around for you either. There are some things that are simply your issue that you need to figure out (whether it be through counseling, prayer or any other medium that helps you).
To answer your question, this is TOTALLY a non issue. What I would encourage you to focus on is why you are so insecure about something so mundane.
Post # 49
Totally over reacting. There is clearly noting to worry about. My name is Melanie and every calls me Mel. Friends, coworkers, family, even parents of the children I work with. I am not havinh an affair with any of this people. The only people that call me Melanie are the children I work with or strangers I meet.
Post # 50
Does not matter if you were overreacting or not, those are your feelings, an wrong or not you are entitled to them. I am very glad that you finally approached the topic head one and had an honest discussion. He clearly did not mean anything beyond it being a name, and this help assuage you.