Post # 1
My fiance has been divorced from his ex-wife for almost 2 years (He and I have been dating for 13 months and just recently got engaged). His divorce was a benficial split for both parties and they parted on good terms and we even occasionally spend time with his ex-wife and her new partner (long story, but the ex-wife realized she was gay).
I don’t dislike his ex, and I’m glad that it wasn’t a horrible painful divorce for them (apparently the marriage was pretty lousy, and so the divorce was a great release). I don’t think I feel (or should feel) jealous of her because she is obviously gay and with her new partner now, and my fiance loves me.
But one thing kind of bugs – his passwords for all his stuff – computers, email, facebook, etc, are all based on the pet name he had for his ex-wife. It means that when I use his computers I have to type in her name to unlock the screen, and of course he would be typing it a lot for email, etc.
I said something to him about changing his passwords (I don’t want them to be my name or anything like that, just not hers), and he was sort of freaked out about it and having to remember new ones. He says that it shouldn’t matter because he loves me and not her and he’s with me and not her. He was so upset about having to remember new passwords, I felt kind of bad for mentioning it. I know if I want him to, he will change them, and I thought that I would want that, but now I’m feeling kind of bad about wanting that.
Would it bug you if your fiance/husband’s computer passwords were his ex-wife’s pet name?
Post # 3
Yes, yes it would. He can remember a new 6-8 letter word.
Post # 4
I would be a little annoyed but it would not be a big deal. I would not be happy about changing all of my passwords either. It takes time.
Maybe let him know that it would be nice if he eventually did it? No rush but it would make you feel better.
Post # 5
It would bug me, but given the circumstances, I wouldnt let it get to me. Just let it go.
Post # 6
Yes. I would say, “I know you have memorized these ones, but it bothers me because it makes me think you don’t want to let her go.”
Post # 8
I’m not sure if it would bother me, but I don’t think it’s that hard to remember a new password.
Post # 10
Would it bother me to type in my FI’s ex’s pet name every single time I logged on to my home computer and other random websites? Absolutely. It’s not that hard to change your passwords. You simply do it the very next time you happen to be logging in.
Post # 11
It would bother me a bit… But on the otherhand, I’ve used the same password since I was 14, so I’m right in line with the whole “its too hard to remember a new one.”
Post # 12
He should be changing all his passwords every few months anyway!!
Post # 13
It would botherr me. Just because everytime I have to write in the password, it would automatically remind me of his ex and who wants to be reminded of the ex. Good or bad terms.
Post # 14
Yes, that would seriously bother me as well.
Post # 15
It would 100% bother me 🙁
Post # 16
@Jennlee: Yes. It would massively bug me and I would change them myself!