Would you abstain from having sex for the first 3 months of your pregnancy?

posted 2 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
42510 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

My doctor said there was no medical reason to abstain.

Post # 3
Member
1961 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Ruby Princess

nope. there is no mechanical way intercourse would induce a miscarriage that early, UNLESS there was already something else going on.  the embryo is soooooo small and the penis does not get anywhere near it. semen can cause cervical softening (prostaglandins) so if you’re nervous about it, don’t have him ejaculate inside you. I get what the doctor is saying, about IF anything were to happen, you might feel guilty about “causing” it. But medically speaking, it’s highly improbable.

Post # 4
Member
2839 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

There’s no medical reason to abstain unless you have a specific complication. I didn’t have a ton of sex in the first trimester because I always felt so crappy, but plenty of people get it on a lot in the first tri and everything’s fine. But the baby is very well-protected in there – you’re not going to shake it loose with normal sexual activity. Your cervix is more irritable than usual during pregnancy (like owner, like cervix in my case) so you might see a little bit of spotting after intercourse – so if that’s going to freak you out, you might want to abstain. But if you want to get it on sometime during the next seven weeks, it really is fine. 

Post # 5
Member
3547 posts
Sugar bee

MRS-K:  God jesus no, I couldn’t do it.  My husband and I were just as active when I was pregnant in the beginning and towards the end compared to when I wasn’t.  I did dry out a couple of times, but no we didn’t abstain at all, and we now have a beautiful bouncing nearly 10 month old.  I definitely think that it is your choice, but make sure your husband is on board with it.

Post # 7
Member
5279 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

I did not abstain during any of my two pregnancies.

Post # 8
Member
8706 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

As far as I know, if you have no medical need there is no reason to abstain. I wouldn’t unless I had to for some reason.

Post # 9
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

MRS-K:  I wouldn’t abstain specifically for that reason– as has been said many times over, if there is an early miscarriage, it’s usually due to chromosomal issues.  

It’s always why I never understand why they say caffeine can contribute to miscarriage.  Because if you actually miscarry, they’ll turn around and tell you it’s absolutely not your fault and there’s nothing you could have done differently.

If it’s a mental thing for you, and you think it will make you feel better- go for it.  But don’t feel  bad if you feel like going for it, either.

Post # 10
Member
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I had sex the day I miscarried last year so it kind of set me on edge this time, but that pregnancy was already not viable, sex was not a contributing factor in that. Then I was put on progesterone suppositories this time which made sex kind of gross, but we were both feeling frustrated by abstaining so we ended up just going for it and have had a regular sex life from that point on. Probably about 10 weeks on. No real medical reason not to. 

Post # 11
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I am a doctor. There’s really no medical reason to abstain that early on. You are NOT going to “shake the baby loose” – there’s a closed cervix between the baby and anything else going on in that region!!!! 

Sometimes women will be told to abstain due to placenta praevia (low-lying placenta over your cervix), an incompetent cervix, or premature rupture of membranes but all those are later issues, generally not in your first three months.

If you feel up to it then go for it!!!! 

Post # 12
Member
4410 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I have never ever heard any doctor, nurse, or midwife suggest abstinence during the first three months of pregnancy for a healthy woman with a normal pregnancy. I have been pregnant twice, and I’ve also read tons of books on pregnancy and have never come across this advice. 

That said, if you have morning sickness, you may not want to have sex in the beginning! But that’s an entirely different story. 

Post # 13
Member
2079 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

MRS-K:  My doctor said having sex is okay too, unfortunately, I haven’t felt like having it.

Post # 14
Member
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Heck no! Poor DH would feel rather unloved and unappreciated lol. 

 

Post # 15
Member
1441 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would seriously consider getting a new doctor. 

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