Well there is nothing now that i can do about the gap - and its there because we have the opportunity to use a zoo (our venue) for photos ... but heres the scenerio:
chapel at 2:30 - probably done by 3
cocktails at the zoo at 6:30
guests have the opportunity to walk around the zoo between the chapel and cocktails, and mother-in-law is openning her home in case people feel like waiting there.
Yeah, I'm going to be honest here.....I wouldn't be thrilled about such a long gap.
Honestly, if I saw that on the invitation, I may just be inclined to attend the reception only.
agreed. i'd be more inclined to just simply go to the reception
Personally, I would LIKE the gap because I can walk around the zoo and look at the animals! I'd honestly be a little bummed to spend a day at the zoo but not get to see the animals much lol.
Awesome choice in venue, btw. I wanted to get married at a zoo, it would have been awesome, but FI was not so in to it..
Anyway, if you can't change it then there's no point stressing about it, i'm sure people won't mind though.
If I had to roam around with a finger up my bum, I'd just opt to go to the reception. Unless I was particularly interested to roam around a zoo for three and a half hours at mid-day.
Would I be annoyed? No. I would just opt to not go to the ceremony.
the gap has to be there - i guess if people just show to the recption -im cool with that. i just wish guest understood i dont have control over the times. the chapel has a specfic time it was willing to marry us, and the zoo had a specific time it was willing to start.
We would definitely enjoy walking around the zoo looking at the animals, we would also enjoy finding a bar to hang out at for a little while.
Where are you from? In the States that would be considered an awfully long gap, and yeah, I probably wouldn't be thrilled with it.
In the UK gaps like that are much more normal and accepted. I don't think many would bat an eye.
I don't know why people get their panties in a bunch about gaps. We had to have one or we would lose daylight for our pictures (sun sets at what? 4 pm in january?). Our wedding was downtown and the venues were walking distance from eachother, so our guests hit the bar before cocktails. Nobody complained to us!
@jen 42713: So...the chapel is at the zoo or is that a completely different location?
I ask because i was in a wedding about 10 years ago that had a similar setup. The church cremony was 2pm, but the reception at the zoo didn't start util 6, so an arrangement was made at a hotel bar for people to mingle and unwind.
I think that worked out relatively well for people.
Lastly, people aren't going to blame you-- I don't think I've ever been to a wedding that didn't have some gap between ceremony and reception. Though it would be nice if there wasn't a waiting period, people kind of expect that!
the chapel and the zoo are in two different locations. my side of the family is out of town - so they will have a hotel, if they dont want to go to my mother-in-laws or the zoo.
I would be fine with it as long as I knew that there was a gap so that I could bring walking shoes for the zoo!
Do you have a wedding website where you can state, "There is a 3 hour gap, please feel free to use this time to wander the zoo and see the animals" Something to that effect. Then I would know to bring comfortable shoes.
@FMM: good idea ... maybe i will send out an email with that information. invations are already sealed ....
Your wedding guests are not going to want to walk around the zoo in suits and formal dresses. I'd be annoyed by this gap. If I was an out of town guest I'd REALLY be annoyed because I wouldn't know the city.
I like zoos :-) just make sure people are aware on it so they bring suitable foot ware!!
Is this a casual wedding? Would clothes, and especially shoes, that would be conducive to spending 3 hours wander a zoo be the type of attire expected at the reception? Is so, I'd be thinking of it as an awesome day to spend at the zoo with a bit of wedding/reception snuck in there. Just a warning, after 3+ hours at the zoo, I might not be able to party late at night. So I wouldn't expect the reception to last very late.
I'm used to Catholic weddings and there normally is about an hour or 1.5hr gap but 3hours is alot. I'd be worried because during the gap alot of people go hit a bar and with that large of a gap I'd be worried no one ate anything with the drinks.
I do think putting something out there before hand letting people know to bring shoes to walk around the zoo. Also people will probably change out of dressy clothes into more comfortable ones for your reception.
I think it has less to do with "not understanding" and more to do with people going, "What am I going to do for 3 hours?"
I only devote a few hours for a wedding unless I was incredibly super close with the bride and groom or if I was in the wedding.
Other than that, you get a few hours of my time. I'm not going to devote half my Saturday to a wedding.
ETA: Formalwear at a zoo? That is, if you're expecting people to dress up that is. People walking around in nice clothing & uncomfortable shoes isn't really the bee's knees. If you're telling people they can bring something more comfortable, where are they going to change, and if they only bring shoes, are they just going to lug them around the zoo for three hours?
Meh, I'd still go to both the ceremony and reception even if the gap was annoying. I would never skip one part and go to the other. Adults can occupy themselves, and maybe give a few suggestions of things to do in an OOT bag if you're concerned. I would probably get a bite to eat, take a nap, or explore the local area in the time gap.
I love zoos, so I probably wouldn't mind so much. What I would mind is walking around in fancy clothes and most likely painful shoes haha! Adding that little tidbit about exploring the zoo should definitely be included in your wedding website or an e-mail :) If I'm prepared to be walking around, I think it could make for a very memorable and unique wedding!
How much time will you need for photos? Can you take them while guests are enjoying hors d'oeuvres and cool beverages for an hour and a half at your venue and then simply begin your formal reception at 4:30 p.m. instead of 6:30 p.m., or is there another wedding or event at the venue that day ythat would prevent you from having access to it until 6:30?
@Hyperventilate: Interesting to hear your side. I always assume that my day will be devoted to wedding activities when I accept an invitation. I've never been to a wedding in my hometown, so maybe that has something to do with it. I'm traveling there for the sole purpose of a wedding, not a vacation, so free time is just a bonus for me.
It's never ideal to have a gap, but people are adults and can find something to do. I like your idea of sending out an email or posting some ideas of things to do on a wedding website.
Is your wedding formal? There's no way I'd walk around a zoo in a cocktail dress!
@oneofthesethings: um ... i love my venues. i dont have church i belong to ... we were left with just a chapel - and it was where his parents got married. the zoo was were we had our first date - its sentimental.
@Brielle: no those were the times were were given buy the chapel and the wedding - can't change them.
and yes - its a formal wedding ... dont care so much if people come casual - buts a formal affair.
Yes I would be annoyed but I would deal. DH loves penguins so he would be thrilled.
im really kind of surprise that so many people would be annoyed. all weddings i have ever been to take up your enitre day anyway - and at least im giving them something to do ...
@BooRadley: If I have to travel for a wedding, that's one thing. If it's "local" (Around a 45 minute drive) that's another. Traveling also plays a factor in my stay time -- If I have to drive more than 45 minutes one way to your wedding, I'll be more likely to leave earlier. If I was flying in that point is null, but if I have to transport myself, my travel time will definitely play a huge role in how long I stay and when I show up.
If I had to travel more than 45 minutes to a wedding, and I was driving myself -- if I was not holy crap super close to the bride and groom, I'd only attend the reception (In this scenario with the 3 hour gap that I wouldn't be waiting around for) and likely not leave early.
If I waited around for 3 hours and had a 45+ minute drive, I'd absolutely and definitely leave early.
If I was whoa damn super close to the bride and groom, I'd do everything in my power to attend early, but depending on my schedule I'd do my damndest to stay.
All of these points are pretty much made moot if my husband's schedule was going to be a conflict regardless of my travel time. He's military and if he's scheduled to work a weekend, I'd spend very limited time at a wedding and/or leave early regardless of how close I am to the bride and groom (With the exception of my best friend. But she's already married so this isn't really a factor.) because I get so very little time with my husband.
I would be beyond irritated and probably just decline to go. I'm not particularly fond of zoos and I just don't like waiting around. Especially in a dress? No way. I would definitely send a gift though!
I personally would have a fun time with it :) I think this is just one of those things - some people will be annoyed, some will make the best of it, some will enjoy it! Like I said, I'd get a kick out of the zoo! But you absolutely should send out an email or some other form of correspondence clearly outlining what's going on. I would make sure to wear something I could comfortably walk around in, that wasn't floor length, and I'd probably bring two pairs of shoes. It's also very nice for your family member to offer to host people at her house :) A nice alternative to the zoo for some! And others will be able to go to their hotel room and nap, or watch a movie, etc etc.
Honestly, yes. I don't mind an hour or so, but I hate long gaps. The zoo can be fun, but I would have no interest in wandering around the zoo while I'm all dressed up for a wedding.
@jen 42713: Honestly, I hate large gaps of time between the ceremony and reception, but since you have an activity planned (I love the zoo!) I wouldn't mind at all.
To me the question is, if they show up at the zoo early, are they going to be forced to pay zoo admission since it's so much before your event? Because that would royally tick me off.
I would also be a bit concerned about walking around a zoo in formal attire. Is there someplace you have access to at the zoo that people can change and keep their stuff if they want to walk around?
@jen 42713: But you are giving people a very limited option of something to do. You are asking people to either wander a zoo in formal clothing or find something else to do for a big window of time in a place they may not be familiar with. For me personally, I would enjoy the zoo but I have older aunts/uncles and coworkers who would not enjoy it. So those guests either MUST rent a room or go find something to do in between. You may have guests literally sitting in cars at your reception site waiting. Not everyone is comfortable wandering around a town they aren't familiar with.
Either way, it doesn't matter now. Your wedding is 2 months away and isn't getting changed. I'd do what @FMM: suggested and also point out a few other points of interest nearby for guests to visit if they don't want to wander the zoo all dressed up.
Why are you even asking this question if you're dead set on doing it your way? You chose the venues, comfort of your guests be damned, and now you have to deal with the consequences. What are you looking for by posting here?
My concern would be - do I have to pay the cost of admission? If not, how do your guests go about identifying themselves as part of the later event if they show up so early? If I'm getting dressed up, taking time out of my weekend, presumably buying you a gift, etc. and then I have to either wander around for 3 hours OR pay admission to a place I might not be too happy about it.
I think you shouldn't stress about it if you can't change it.
Having gaps between the ceremony and reception is pretty common, and at least you have an activity for your guests to do in between! I don't think I would mind roaming around the zoo.
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