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Your MOH suddenly decided to have her 2 month baby's baptism 2 weeks before your wedding?
I'm pretty peeved but I don't know how or what to say to her.
Do I have a right to be upset about this?
I wouldn't be upset. Baptism and weddings have little to do with each other. Are you afraid your friends will show up for that and not your wedding? Are you afraid it'll outshine your wedding b/c honestly it wouldn't even cross my mind? To me, it's a bit petty.
EDIT: Petty is a harsh word, sorry about that. I just don't understand what you would be concerned about?
May I ask what would be going on two weeks before your wedding that you're upset she's having the baptism? I really don't think it's anything to be this upset over that would consider having words with her. Just my opinion.
I wouldn't be upset. If it was on the actual day, or during that weekend, yes, I'd be peeved, but not 2 weeks before.
Honestly, the only reason i would be upset is if I thought people would travel to that, and as a result, be unable to travel again in two weeks for my wedding. Otherwise, they're such different events, and you'll be busy, sure, but you can take time off for a baptism!
Why exactly are you upset? It's two whole weeks before your wedding; I think there will be plenty of time for her to focus on you! Just my opinion though.
No, I really wouldn't be upset. Unless it was the day of, before, or after, I really wouldn't care.
As long as it doesn't keep her from any wedding related events then it shouldn't bother you too much.
I know how you feel though. One our groomsmen (FI was in his wedding in May). Decided to take their honey moon (read above, they were married in May) two weeks before our wedding and couldn't take anymore time off from work, so he was going to miss FI bachelor party. He ended up making it, but it was disapointing feeling like we were put on the back burner.
I don't think I would be upset, they are two completely seperate things. Plus i'm sure MOH is very excited for the baptism so just enjoy and help celebrate with her as I'm sure she will be celebrating with you on your big day!
I'm not sure I understand why a baptism held two weeks before your wedding is such a big deal? Maybe if it was 2 days before, but two weeks seems plenty of time for her to get it over with and still be able to help you out as MOH.
Why are you upset about it? Is it conflicting with another wedding related event that weekend?
I don't understand why you are upset???
You should be happy for her.
I am sure she didn't pick the date to make you mad at her.
OMG ladies, cut Autumn D some slack!!!! It just irks me to the bone that whenever a bride comes on this site to vent they typically get more hurtful comments via cyberworld than what they are already experiencinng in real life. UNBELIEVABLE!
Maybe she has her own reasons, at least give her a chance to respond before jumping at her! GEEEZZZZZZZZ
agree with everyone else. a baptism is like a 3 hour event on a Sunday morning. I don't see the conflict. 2 months is about when everyone i know has the baptism!
I wouldn't be upset. Actually, my cousin is having his baby baptised two weeks before my wedding and my other cousin is having her son's birthday party the weekend before my wedding. Of course, neither of these (nor my wedding) involve any extensive travel for any of my family.
you get 1 day, you don't get a week or 2 weeks or a month. no right to be upset with this.
I can't say that you shouldn't be upset...but I wouldn't be. My sister is getting married in Norfolk, VA on Sept 18th and I will be travelling to Atlanta, GA the following weekend to attend the baby dedication for one of my close friends daughter. I live in Charlotte, NC so it will be a lot of driving but I love them both so I wouldn't miss either event, or choose one over the other. Plus a baby dedication is nothing like a wedding so I don't see guests choosing to go to one and not the other either.
@LacrosseBride: wow....your words are a bit harsh..Try being a bit more understanding to other people's feelings. Coming on these boards and saying, "get over yourself" doesn't help.
@AutumnD:and I also don't understand why you would be so upset about this. She's not "stealing your thunder" or anything. People have their own events and you should just be happy for them, just like they are for you. What is it that you're so upset about? We're all wondering..
@kericita: I have to disagree with your second sentence. Everyone has a right to their own feelings.
To the OP, no, I wouldn't be upset, I don't think the two events are related! Is there more to the story?
I'm with PPs on not understanding what the issue is. Maybe there is more to the story?
OK since Mighty Sapphire deleted it and said I was mean, I'll try again. Most churches have baptisms ONE Sunday a month and they tell YOU when you can have your baptism. It's not like a wedding where you can select any Sunday you want. Your MOH probably did not have any choice in the matter.
Is that better for you Mighty Sapphire?
I have no idea why you'd be peeved about that. It's not like it's the day before your wedding or something. Any explaination as to why? Was she suppose to help you do something?
@LukesGirl: well you took the high road by berating me, didn't you. You could've handled that privately but chose the same path I did. Pot kettle black.
I wouldn't be upset, especially since you have so much notice....
Even if I didn't have that much notice, I can't see being upset.
@LacrosseBride: Thank you, that's much better than your original post. Posts without peronal attacks, namecalling, and snarkiness are always allowed on WB!
Are you upset because you think you will be too busy two weeks before your own wedding to attend the christening? If that is the case I am sure she would understand if you can't make it. Although you may welcome the distraction from wedding stuff for a few hours by the time the date rolls around. Otherwise, I don't see that it would end up being a problem for you.
@TG20:Maybe you didn't read her post right. She is not venting, she is asking for opinions. Her title clearly states it, and her last sentence directly asks if she is right to be upset about this. And up until your post, people were pretty nice about it...
I wouldn't be upset. Her child's baptism doesn't take anything away from you - you will still be married two weeks later.
@egb: To clarify, lacrossebride wrote a questionable post that got deleted by MightySapphire and then lacrossebride rewrote it, so I think that's what TG20 was probably referencing without being specific, b/c TG20's post was right after lacrossebride's original post.
I dont get it either, this would not bother me at all... there must be more to this story...
I wouldnt be upset..its a totally unrelated event...UNLESS your MOH is you sister and you geel like she is stealing your thunder..but even then.
I would not be upset about this. Do people have to travel for the baptism as well as your wedding? Are you worried she's going to be too busy to help you out?
If my math is right she recently HAD the baby. Its not like you can plan these things way in advance.
Since you asked the question, no, I don't believe you have the right to be upset. I'm not sure of her reasons for planning the baptism on that day, but to her, her child will always come before your wedding (especially if it's still two weeks before the wedding). And I'm not sure what you mean by "suddenly" decided. It's still almost two months away!
No. You have no right to be upset. Other people's lives don't stop because you are getting married. Plus, as everyone else has said, it is 2 weeks before your wedding. I don't think a baby's baptism is going to "steal your thunder".
Most baptisms are scheduled for when the baby is about 2 months sometimes 3 of age - although I have family members that have waited until their baby was 5-7 months. Many churches have different functions throughout the month as well and many do designate a specific time for baptisms. You have to remember what it is that is going on - its part of the regular sunday service and her family members and a few close friends will probably stop by her place after for cake and a small social hour. Thats really all there usually is to baptisms. I think you have to try to remember that this is an important moment in her life and her childs life as well and it in no way takes away from your event. You should be excited for your friend just as I am sure she is really excited about your wedding. I know there is this idea that everything has to be about the bride, all of us bees know that because lets face it we all get caught up in the details and this weird idea of all the spotlight on the bride, but this small moment belongs to your friend and her family. Remember to support her family the way she will be supporting you and your family on your wedding day.
It's totally hard to share your time as a bride. But don't forget that just as you want your MOH to support your life events, you also need to be there to support hers. Don't worry—the baptism won't detract from your moment to shine as a bride, and you'll have your MOH next to you, happy that you were able to support her family, too.
I agree that its unfair to be upset over this. Also, in many churches, (I can only speak for catholic churches), baptisms are all done together on one weekend, once or twice a year. Its the churches policy so that they don't have baptisms everything single weekend. So your MOH may not have even had any choice in the matter. But even if she did, I think she has the right to baptize her kid. its not like its the same weekend.
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