Would you believe your SO if you were in this situation?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Would you believe your partner in this situation?
    Yes, I trust my partner completely : (29 votes)
    49 %
    No, I'd think it's a complete lie : (3 votes)
    5 %
    Sort of. It would seem a little suspicious all of a sudden, but whatever : (27 votes)
    46 %
    Other (please describe) : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    2073 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Hmmm…. I don’t know.   I’d probably try and give him the benefit of the doubt and wait and see if a pattern emerges.  I guess for me it would also depend on where he worked.  It would also depend on his history.  If it were my FI, I’d likely believe him bc he’s been very loyal to me and trustworthy.  The few lies I’ve caught him in were relatively minor and I gave him enough hell that he knows anything on a big scale would be a deal breaker for me. 

    I guess it all depends on your relationship and his history of trustworthiness.  If the pattern continued, then the next time he said he was staying late, I’d show up with a coffee for him and reassure myself that he’s being honest. 

    Post # 4
    875 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I would ask DH why he wanted to study at work instead of at home….since my DH is not a good liar, I think I’d be able to tell by his manner of answering/body launguage what was really going on.

    ETA: Important to ask in person, in a non threatening way (like off the cuff when he’s relaxed) and also to know whether or not your SO is a good liar!

    Post # 5
    846 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @MrsPhilly:  What she said. It just depends on your FI’s history and if he’s been trustworthy in the past. 

    Post # 7
    655 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I will add that I was your SO in this situation. I got a job in an office in my field and i’m working on my masters thesis. I find that when I go home I get sucked into housework, or wedding planning or whatever, so I started staying late at work to write because it is quiet and there are not a million little distractions like at home. Honestly, it works great and I would trust that if he struggles with procrastination like me and is easily distracted then trust he needs the space to be away and just study. Having your SO around when you are studying is also a wonderful distraction, so he may just need physical space to study well. 


    Post # 8
    863 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @futuremrste: If this was the first time and my SO hadn’t given me any reason to be suspicious in the past then of course I would trust him. I’m kind of a procrastinator and I find doing stuff for work at home hard because there are so many discractions. 


    Post # 9
    3557 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    @futuremrste:  Honestly that there were fewer distractions at work was my first thought. My FI is taking his final college course online this fall while working a very stressful job. I worry a bit about his focus when he tries to do his school work all holed up in his office where all of his fun stuff (computer games, the internet, warhammer, and fun books) is just waiting to distract him. Cheating was not my first thought, but then FI and I have great communication and trust each other completely. If you really are worried what your FI thinks I would just have a conversation with him, maybe start by bringing up that random FB message and ask him if that ever crossed his mind.

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