(Closed) Would you confront them?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: If your friend stole from your wedding venue, would you say something to them?
    Yes : (37 votes)
    74 %
    No : (11 votes)
    22 %
    Other : (2 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3176 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I wouldn’t try to make a point of it, but if this is someone you see fairly often I would 100% mention that not only did you have to shell out $40.00 fo his stupidity but someone also lost there job b/c of it! I would find it very difficult NOT to say something.

    Post # 4
    Member
    6664 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I probably wouldn’t. Just because there’s nothing anyone can do about it now so there’s no need for an awkward conversation. I would sum it up to everyone having a little too much to drink at an awesome party and things getting slightly out of hand. Could have been much worse!

    As DH and I were leaving our after party (which was paid for by us), the security guy asked if we wanted to end it early since so many people ‘didn’t need another hour of drinking’. There were a lot of drunkies at our after party! We weren’t concerned b/c no one was driving home and it’s a wedding for gosh sakes! If you can’t get obliterated at a wedding after party at 1:30am, when can you?? So the venue may look down a little at us for that, but I was more concerned with everyone having a good time and remembering my wedding as a little crazy/awesome instead of somethign they were reprimanded for.

    Post # 5
    Member
    11328 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I would think I *should* speak to them… but I prob wouldn’t but ugh… the drama. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    140 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Your not crazy..I would be pissed you just spent money on a all you could drink bar and that wasnt enough for them… Im sorry that a friend did that to yall.  I just wonder why the one guy threw the other guy under the bus when he was part of it too???

    Post # 7
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I think they definitely owe you $40 at the least. And the fact that the bartender lost her job?! That’s awful.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1116 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    Honestly, I’d just let that go. Sucks that they did it. But people do stupid things while drinking.

    In the grand scheme of things, to me $40 bucks isn’t worth getting that upset over. The place treated you well but it was the bartender who let you know about the theft and then pocketed the money (!) so I wouldn’t worry too much about it.

    ETA – oh wait…did I mis-read this? Did the bartender pocket the money and that’s why she was fired? Or they fired her for confronting you and demanding the bottle be paid for? If so, that sucks. And that would be the thing I would confront them on. Just to let them know that their stupidity cost someone her job. But I still wouldn’t demand $40 bucks from them.

    Post # 9
    Member
    5978 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I think I agree with Moderndaisy…I would just chalk it up to everyone having too much to drink and acting stupid. I don’t think I would say anything. There isn’t a whole lot anyone can do about it now.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3710 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I don’t know that I would say anything to the friend(s) who stole the wine b/c they may have been drunk and doing what drunk people sometimes do…act stupid. However, I would send a nice note to the venue thanking them for doing such a great job and being so accomodating and apologizing for the theft. I mean…it was beyond your control but I am sure the venue would still appreciate the gesture.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2209 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I thinkthis is what you should say:

    “Hey C and T, we know what happened with the wine. The wedding staff treated us really well, and it made us look bad that someone stole. We ended up just paying for the bottle, but it was a negative and annoying blotch on an otherwise great day. Honestly, I’m not going to make a federal case out of it, we were all partying and having a good time. But I am going to give you an opportunity to apologize. I hope you will do so, so we can just forget about this.”

    Post # 13
    Member
    1391 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Well the bartender got fired off her own stupidty so I can’t really feel bad about her being fired…

     

    I would WANT to say something but I would probably just end up letting it go. Stealing is not cool or okay but it doesnt sound like either one will care or pay up.

    Post # 14
    Member
    3219 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I cant believe the bartender lost her job! How horrible!

    Im kinda on the fence if you should say somthing or not.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1667 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I wouldn’t go out of my way to say something about it, but if I saw them again i would certainly let them know that their theft cost $40 and someones job. Whether or not they actually feel bad, they should know the consequences of their actions and perhaps think twice before doing it again.

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