Post # 1
I ran across a discussion about garter tossing, and that got me to thinking. How many of you would/ did do a garter toss?
How many of you wouldn’t/ did not do one, and why?
Personally I find it a bit unsavory, having the husband up under the dress of his wife in front of everyone and then tossing the garter. But I’ve talked to other people who think it’s just a bit of fun at the expense of the couple, and that it’s harmless.
So what’s your opinion on this tradition?
Post # 3
We didn’t do either toss because we don’t have many single friends left, and we didn’t want to put them on the spot.
Post # 4
@Didgeridoo: We did it and it was fun. Fun being the key word here. It certainly isn’t mandatory.
Post # 5
We’re both older (I’m the younger of the two and I’m 37). My FI is very traditional and reserved and there is no way, even if we were younger, that he’d consider something like that. I think it seems less unsavory the younger the couple though.
The best variation I’ve seen on this though was at my brother’s wedding. He is a cop and there were a lot of police in attendance, The whole bit started off with his sitting my SIL in a chair and getting down on one knee as if he was going to do the traditional removal and then he suddenly stood up, stood her up, turned her around, pulled a pair of handcuffs out of his back pocket and proceeded to cuff and pat her down. Given the audience, it was hilarious.
Post # 6
@Didgeridoo: we’ll be doing it! I think it’s a fun tradition that doesn’t have to be unsavory unless you make it that way. I don’t see why it makes people so uncomfortable, honestly. Unless he’s up there for ten minutes and the bride looks like she’s having too much fun, what’s the big deal?
Post # 7
@Didgeridoo: Totally skeeved out by its current incarnation. Here on the ‘Bee I read from someone that a few decades ago it was way less sexualized (i.e. the groom’s entire head and upper body did not go up under the dress) and the bride sometimes played an active role in it. That I would at least consider.
We’re doing neither bouquet toss nor garter. Even though I’ve got way less issues against the bouquet toss, we’ll only have about 6 single ladies in attendance (at a 150+ person wedding) and I can’t fathom shaming them in such a way. We’re doing an anniversary dance and awarding my bouquet to the winner, instead.
Post # 9
We had a luncheon, so a garter toss would have been REALLY out of place! But I definitely would have dne one if we’d had an evening reception or one with dancing!
Post # 10
We did have a garter toss – but my husband never pulled it off my leg. It was never even on my leg. I tossed a bouquet, and when the time came, all he did was toss a garter.
I just don’t find the garter toss to be a classy thing – it really depends on your audience and how the people themselves feel about it, though. My in-laws are a little…stiff and reserved, so I’m sure they would just love me after a display like that.
Post # 11
Thanks for the opinions so far, ladies! Interesting to see.
@cookiecreamcakes, that’s an interesting variation. I hadn’t thought of just throwing it without the removal part.
Post # 12
Nope, too gross for me. Not to mention that we’ve had lots of bad experiences at other weddings when it came to the tosses (such as being physically pushed out to do one, the DJ calling FI by his FULL NAME, etc.). We would never make them mandatory, but it’s still not something that we have the desire to do.
Post # 13
I’m not doing it, my wedding is going to be pretty small. Not doing bouquet toss either.
Post # 14
Not having a bridal party at all, so therefore not doing either toss.
Post # 15
@Didgeridoo: We’re skipping it because it seems silly to us, and there will be few single people at our wedding. We can imagine who the “winners” of the bouquet and garter toss might be pretty easily with such few single people, and the thought of my brother putting a garter on my fiancé ‘s cousin is super creepy.
Post # 16
Never liked that part of weddings and I refuse to do it.