(Closed) Would YOU get an engagement ring your boyfriend hates?

posted 2 years ago in Rings
  • poll: Would you get a ring if your SO hates it?
    Yes : (41 votes)
    23 %
    No : (92 votes)
    52 %
    It depends : (43 votes)
    24 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    679 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I didn’t get to pick out my own ring, but if I did, I would take his feelings into consideration since he’s the one buying the ring and it’s supposed to be a gift from him.  If he absolutely “hated” something that I loved however, I personally would try to compromise or find out what specifically he hated and work around that.  I would want my FI to be just as exicted about my ring as me and not loathe what I picked out.

    Post # 3
    Member
    98 posts
    Worker bee

    What does his Moms ring look like? Not all Halo rings look the same. Have you shown your SO this ring? I would still get it because he is right, you will be wearing it and if it makes you happy then that is all that matters.

    Post # 4
    Member
    904 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 1975

    GirlyGirl24:  That ring is sooo beautiful! And the nails are lovely with it, pretty color.

    I put “it depends.” If that’s the style you really want, and you see it as your forever ring, he’s right – you will be the one wearing it (who knows, he might end up eventually liking it too). Go with what your gut is telling you.

    Since my FI paid for my ring (I know there are some couples who go half or some deal where the woman helps pay for part of the ring), I gave him ideas of what I liked and he ultimately took everything into consideration and chose a ring that incorporated both of our personalities/likes. My ring is beautiful, I love it, but the symbolism of it means more to me. The look of it is important, don’t get me wrong, but I love it because my FI gave it to me because we want to spend our lIves together.

    You’re the only one who knows your relationship. I would continue talking to your SO and trying on many different styles of rings. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    No, I wouldn’t. For the amount of money we dropped on my ring, I wanted both of us to like it. I wanted him to look at my ring and feel proud of it.

    Post # 6
    Member
    527 posts
    Busy bee

    No. As much as have to love it, I still wanted him to be proud of it. After telling him what I loved, however, he chose the perfect one.

    Post # 8
    Member
    726 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    i put “no”. I would ask for something or a style I love if he didn’t like it, but if he HATES it I wouldn’t get it or push to get it. 

    I love that my FI looks at the ring he picked out on my hand and thinks it’s amazing. It would be so sad if he thought the symbol of growing relationship was ugly. 

     

    But I agree with other posters: has he seen different halos in person? Maybe he dosent like the halo being a different shape then the center stone, or if the halo stones are too big or small 

    Post # 9
    Member
    314 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    No I wouldnt. There are enough styles in the world for you both to find something to agree upon. If he’s really being stubborn, then butter him up as best you know how! Compromise is the foundation to a marriage, this is a great way to start practicing 🙂

    Post # 10
    Member
    13020 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    If it was the only style I *really* loved and wanted and he really didn’t care or mind buying it for me, yes. I’ve seen threads here where a man wants a wedding band that the woman HATES and most the time the response is “he’s the one wearing it so he should get to pick and love it”, so why wouldn’t that be the case for an e-ring too?

    Post # 11
    Member
    4043 posts
    Honey bee

    Hate is a strong word, but has he seen the specific ring you want? While I would take my DH’s opinion into consideratigon, he would want me to get something I personally love, and I would do the same for his gifts. Ultimately you will be wearing it, so I would say you really need to love it or else you might regret such a big purchase. Just my thoughts. 🙂 

    Post # 12
    Member
    4641 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    No I wouldn’t. Making the decision to get married and becoming engaged was one we made together, it would only make sense to choose the ring together and have it be something we both like.

    In general, neither of us buy things the other one doesn’t like, we both really value each others opinions. Whether it be on jewlery, clothing, furniture.. Anything really.

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    2197 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    GirlyGirl24:  First of all that ring you posted is gorgeous!

    But to answer your question, no, I would not get a ring he hated. When we first started discussing rings, I was looking at step-cut center stones (Emeralds and Asschers). However, he disliked them and felt they didn’t sparkle enough. I was sad. I loved the simplicity and hard edges. So we went to look at rings together to find something we both liked. Soon I fell madly in love with halos. I wasn’t a huge fan of them until I tried them on. Ultimately we went with a yellow diamond in a double halo. We both loved the way the yellow contrasted against the bright white halo. He says the ring is very ME and I couldn’t agree more!

    I’d say just have open communication with him. See about going to a store to try rings on together without pressure to buy. Just tell him you’d like to look at different styles on your hand together. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    879 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I can imagine my man disliking a ring, but I can’t imagine him caring enough to actually hate one.

    So to kind of answer your question… if my FI disliked a ring but still offered to get if for me if I loved it enough, hell yes I’d get it! I’m the one who has to wear it everyday! But if he flat out refused to get it because he “hated” it, I’d find something else a bit more to his liking. 

    GirlyGirl24:  Have you actually tried this ring on for him? My FI turned his nose up at halos when we were looking at rings online. Then, when we actually went to try rings on, he (and I) absolutely loved them. I think what initially turned him off halos is that many are pretty bulky and the centre stone kind of gets lost in there. The ones we ended up trying (and he ultimately purchased one) were super dainty and seem to enhance the centre stone, rather than take away from it. Despite the fact that his mom has a halo ring, I think your man won’t really know if he hates (or loves!) halos until he sees your dream ring on your finger!

    Post # 15
    Member
    2114 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    As my fiance put it when we went to pick out my ring together “You’re the one who has to wear it forever, I want you to love it.”

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