- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2015
I’m going to phrase this carefully because the bride may also be a bee…
I have an acquaintance that I have only seen in a group environment – including other weddings – that is getting married later this summer. They have been engaged for just over a year, and while I did the obligatory FB congrats after her post, I haven’t heard anything else about the entire affair. I know it’s still on, because her closer friends (our mutual friends) have told me about the engagement party, the shower, etc. I haven’t been invited to anything wedding related – nor do I want to be, truthfully.
By some twist of fate, I wound up stuck alone with this acquaintance at a party recently, and she’s obviously excited about her upcoming nuptials so that’s what she wanted to talk about. We chatted for awhile, and she kept letting things slip about wedding-related events that I wasn’t invited to (all the aforementioned events, plus her bachelorette, plus their stag and doe). It didn’t phase me at all BUT THEN she said something along the lines of “Oh, I forgot to mail your invite, it’s coming soon!” after telling me all of her RSVPs are back as they were due mid-June.
So now I’m confused. I’m invited, but I don’t know if it’s a pity invite because she felt bad chatting about it so much or because she legitimately wanted to invite me. I don’t want to go, honestly, because it’s a huge hassle for me. It’s a six hour road trip and an overnight stay, plus a gift and a dress and other things I haven’t factored in…PLUS pet sitting for the days/nights we’re away.
Beyond my own concerns about the logistics of it all, I never thought I was invited, nor have I ever considered inviting her and her FH to my own wedding. We also spent a lot of time talking about how we’re both planning on a budget, so I know she doesn’t have the cash to spare for FI and I to attend (if we’re a pity invite…).
Would you go?
ETA – If I am invited and don’t attend, I will obviously still send my congrats and a gift. When I mentioned my budget before, I was more concerned about factoring in the cost of the road trip, apparel, a hotel for the weekend, etc.