Post # 1
I’m trying to figure out if I should have a rehearsal or not.
Here’s what I’m planning:
No formal bridal party – but asking our siblings, their spouses and their kids to process (in additional to a few friends). The kids are ages 3, 8, 12, 16, 20.
My mom is walking me and she definitely wants to practice. FI and his mom will be there as well. This will be the night before the wedding (friday, early evening).
I’m thinking about telling those that will be part of the processional, that they are welcome to come at that time if they want to practice walking down the aisle and deciding where to sit. (Note: there will be no recessional for anyone in the processional). The venue is about a 45 minute drive for more than half of the people – so it’s not like it’s an easy place to get to.
Do you think this optional rehearsal is a good idea? Or should I have everyone practice?
The pros are: it gives people a chance to be familiar with the venue
The cons are: it’s more hassle and more people to coordinate (and wait for), etc.
My goal is as stress-free of an experience as possible (for me!) 🙂
My other issue is I wanted to have a no-host dinner later that night for anyone that wanted to hang out with us. I was thinking if people did show up to rehearse, then I’d need to cover their tab at the dinner. Right?
Post # 3
I would have a rehearsal since you’re having people process down the aisle. I went to a rehearsal on Saturday and it was a bit disorganized, it took a bit of time to make sure all of the parents know where they should sit when they got to the end of the aisle. Plus, you may want to have some kind of order, and a rehearsal is key to figuring that out!
Instead of a dinner, maybe you could do an after-rehearsal type thing at someone’s house?
Post # 4
I think I’d just either have a rehearsal or not, rather than having an optional one. If a rehearsal is necessary, then everyone needs to be there so that you can figure out order and seating. If a rehearsal is not necessary, than having some people just show up to familiarize themselves with the venue won’t really accomplish much, it seems.
As for dinner, if you do go with a rehearsal, I’d try to pay for at least everyone who came to the rehearsal, since they are there for you.
Post # 5
Thanks – that makes a lot of sense.
So – I guess my next question is: do you think a rehearsal is necessary, given the fact that people are only walking down an aisle and sitting?
Post # 6
I kind of think you should have one. Based on how many kid ages you listed it sounds like it’s a lot of people. And plus you said your mom really wants to practice. I think it will give you peace of mind to know that everyone knows where they should go. Now, if you do have a rehearsal, then you need to have some sort of meal afterwards. If you ask people to be there then you should feed them. But it doesn’t have to be expensive, you can do pizza and beer, or just burgers and hot dogs.
Post # 7
@oracle: Yes, you should still have one. The rehearsal I went to was a big ball of confusion when it came to where people were supposed to sit when they got to the end of the aisle!
Post # 8
Telling everyone to come is expected (even if its not formal). They’ll love to see you and get ready for the big day. Don’t feel like you’re imposing by it being stressful for them. I’m sure they’ll do whatever it takes!! Not to mention kids need help and practice when it comes to big things like weddings! I’m sure they (and they’re parents) will feel more comfortable if they’ve walked it at least once!
Post # 9
Although it’s only the processional, I think it would be much less stressful to make sure everyone knows where to go since there are a lot of people walking down the aisle. It would help to put everyone’s mind at ease if they could practice in person.
Post # 10
I think you should have a rehearsal – if nothing else, it’s nice for everyone to meet each other. However, I don’t think you have to do it at your actual venue. We did it in a random room at our hotel and it was fine.
Post # 11
We made it optional. We didn’t have a wedding party but we just let people know the order they were processing in. I liked giving people the opportunity to get familiar with the venue so there was less chaos the day of, plus I wanted to see how things were going to go.
Our sisters stood up for the exchanging of rings, but my sis was the only one at the rehersal. I think if you’re not super worried about people needing to be cued (our officiant said just asked them to come join us at the correct time) – you’ll be fine.