Post # 1
A little background: I’m 23, my man is 30, and we’ve been living together for about six months, dating for about seven. Everything in our relationship has moved at a fast pace, but we both have been in several long-term relationships previously and know what we want. We’ve been talking marriage for a couple months now, and went ring shopping a month and a half ago.
So last night my SO turned to me in bed and asked, unprovoked, “Would you marry me?” And I replied, “Would I, or will I?” He kind of laughed and said, “Would.” I told him of course I would, and jokingly let him know that he only gets one fake proposal, and that was it. He said that he would only ask me “will” I marry him one time, when he really proposes.
So what I’m wondering is, was this a way for him to feel me out to see if, when he asks, I would say yes? Or am I reading way too far into it? I’m expecting the proposal in the next few months but I don’t know when. He says he doesn’t have the ring yet.
I’m not looking for advice on the length of our relationship or whether we’re moving too fast; we’re stable financially and very happy. But now I’m even more on edge because he keeps bringing up marriage and babies more and more frequently!
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
I guess “feeling you out” would have to be his intent, but it makes no sense to me why he would even need to if you already went ring shopping together. Obviously you are up for it.
Post # 4
According to some, if you are talking about marriage, agreeing to say yes, and going ring shopping, congratulations, by definition you are engaged! You don’t need a ring and an official proposal, just the expressed intent to marry.
Post # 5
@Evanstobe: I think you are correct, he’s trying to reassure himself. No man wants to hear “No”. (Silly boys. Obviously since you went ring shopping with him…)
I love that you gave him a hard time for teasing you with a question like that! I would have said something similar. I don’t think you are reading too far into this, it sounds like things are progressing nicely.
Post # 6
@whoa_its_ash My train of thought was that this might be a sign it’s coming soon-ish..? I’m very happily waiting as I love my SO and our relationship, and am not in a rush, it’s just hard not being in control of something as I am very type-A!
@Fizzy8 I think so too : ) I’m lucky to have a man so eager to commit!
Post # 7
- Wedding: November 2014 - Sea Ranch Lodge
@Evanstobe: Fingers crossed for you! Especially since you’re from San Jose too 😉
Post # 8
@Evanstobe: He’s feeling you out… seeing if you’re ready. My man did that last February. “If I asked you to marry me today, would you say yes? What about if I asked you in a year?” He wanted to know when was too early and when was too late. Good for you for telling him he only gets one fake proposal! I told my guy he was a wimp for asking 😛
Post # 9
I agree with other PPs who say he was just feeling you out and making sure it’s a definite yes. I’d bet it was coming super soon!
I love your response! As anxious as I was toward the end of my waiting period, I would have told him to beat it with that bullshit!
Post # 10
@Evanstobe: It does sound like he is feeling you out, and there is a good chance a proposal is coming, good luck to you!