Post # 1
So I have a 5 and a half month old and I’m 9 weeks pregnant. This is a high risk pregnancy as my physician is expecting me to develop preeclampsia again as I did with my son. This pregnancy has been rough already as I’m exhausted because my son doesn’t sleep through the night yet and I’ve been having severe vommiting.
My hudband has given me the ok to quit my job whenever now but I’m really nervous too. I quit my job when my son was 2.5 months old to stay at home with him. My husband became bitter and refused to help me around the house because that was “my job”. He then bought expensive season tickets for an NBA team and insisted I ask for my job back just 3 weeks after quiting. He was a total d***. He admits that now. He is insisting he would never act like that again because this is for my and the new baby’s health. And I do believe he is sorry for his past behavior. The tickets are returned. I just don’t know what to do!
Post # 2
When in doubt, I take my husbands words at face value. 🙂
I hope you feel better soon and have an uneventful and healthy pregnancy. Congratulations!
Post # 3
Normally I would say quit immediately, but in this particular case it could really mean burning bridges since you’ve only been back for 2 months basically. If you do not intend to go back to work after baby #2 then go ahead and quit, but if you are going to need those contacts from this job, I would stick it out until the doctor says you shouldn’t work.
I hope your husband keeps his word and helps you this time.
Post # 4
Work until the doctor says you absolutely can no longer go in, that way your husband and your job can’t say you flaked out since you’re following orders to protect yourself and your child.
Post # 5
I’d work as long as you can, given your situation and the details you posted.
Post # 6
I think you need to have an in depth conversation with your hisband about both of your expectations of you being at home. Do things like ask him which jobs bother him most about not being done so if you’re having a bad day you can make sure his dinner is ready but leave the washing or whatever he values most/least likes having to do. Make sure he understands the realities of the difficulties of being a stay at home mum with a potentially problem pregnancy and how he can support you but also discuss with him tge realities of him being the sole income etc and what ge will need from you to feel supported. Also ensure that he understands that if you do quit that he cannot change his mind. It is until at least the new baby is here safely
Post # 7
LadySmurph: I agree with Schatzie821:. If you’re hoping to return to work after this baby arrives, I wouldn’t quit now. I would wait until the doctor tells you you should not be working so you don’t hurt future opportunities with this employer. If you’re planning to be a SAHM, then I say go ahead.
I would also speak with your husband about what your role would be like if you were to quit and be home. I would be worried that his behavior may return, regardless of him feeling remorseful. As this pregnancy is high risk, you may be doing less at home even with more time. I would just want him to fully understand everything before going through what I”m sure was horrible last time.
Post # 8
Just so everyone knows, I will definitely not be returning to this job.
I took this job when I was pregnant the first time because it’s a desk job and I had a feeling I wod have complications. This job just pays too low.
I took this job at 17 weeks pregnant and I know they won’t be happy with me announcing my second pregnancy in a year. I wouldn’t be if I were my boss.
Im working 3 days a week now and the cost of day care for two kids just wouldn’t be worth it.
Post # 9
You have already quit and gotten rehired at this same job within the past few months? If I were in your shoes I would suck it up and stick it out as long as possible. This employer graciously took you back, and now you are going to walk out on them again? If you walk out again do not expect to be able to use this job as a reference for future employment.
Post # 10
OtterHalf: I completely agree. My FI had an employee that did something similar and a year later when her new propsective employer called for a reference, FI was honest and told them what happened. I’m not sure if she got the job but bad references have a way of lingering for a long time.
I would work as long as you’re physically able to and it looks much more legitimate having a note from your doctor instead of just saying you’re quiting again.
Post # 11
I personally would stick it out until the doctor said I had to quit. If you believe your husband when he says he wont revert to past behavior and you dont need the income, quit. I would have trouble believing him though, and would wait it out as long as possible.
Post # 12
OtterHalf: I don’t believe my empoyer would have taken me back under different circumstances. They were desperate and I work as a nurse in a call center with a ridiculously high turnover rate. It’s the norm to have two people quit every month. I feel bad as I do like my boss, but I just worry about myself and my son.
And I feel worse as I have been calling out a lot too. First for my son who was really sick then for myself who caught his bug. I have been making constant trips to the bathroom. And needi toale various appointments as this is a high risk pregnancy.
Im starting to question what good I even am to my employer. Maybe when they hire the 20 new nurses and I help train them I’ll quit.
Post # 13
LadySmurph: Personally, I would wait until your dr says you should not work as it would leave a much better reference there than just up and quitting. However, only you know how difficult it will be to tough it out for however long that may be so take everyones advice with a grain of salt. I would also have a very serious conversation with your hubby (before leaving work) about what happened last time and why and what exactly each of your responsibilities/expectations will be this time around since it will be twice as crazy with two kids instead of one =)
Post # 15
Get what your husband said in writing and make him sign it like it’s a contract.