Post # 1
I’m just wondering, as I’m torn. I’m kind of sad and I wasn’t expecting it but it is, what it is. My uncle, after receiving my save the date, told my parents that he and his long time girlfriend, will not be coming to the wedding (it’s my second marriage, first was 18 years ago). He told them he will only go to 1 wedding per person, so he won’t be going. He’s a very selfish person and I know that. I just didn’t expect that. So should I still send him one? Isn’t proper etiquette to still send one since he got a save the date?
Post # 2
- Wedding: September 2014 - Dallas, TX
Normally I would say yes, always send an invitation just in case the situation changes, but that is such a jerk thing to say. Good riddance to him. Don’t waste your money on sending him an invite!
Post # 3
sharksgrl99: So in this particular situation, I’d say just send it – why not? Can’t hurt.
I originally voted “no don’t bother” before reading your post.
Personally, the people who tell us “sorry we can’t make it” won’t be getting an invite, because we’re having a small enough wedding that it’s fairly obvious if the person definitely isn’t coming.
Post # 4
Proper etiquet says to send him one. My normal preference if someone says they can’t go for XYZ reason is to send an invite with a note about how much you would miss them.
That said, your uncle is a jerk.
Post # 5
I would still send him one. Give me a chance to do the right thing, or tell you himself that he isn’t coming.
Post # 6
- Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI
Normally, I would and I did for many of my guests but based on your specific situation I wouldn’t feel bad about not sending one.
Post # 7
I’d send one, but then again I’m kind of an asshole and like to kill nasty people with kindness because they have no idea what to do. Who knows.. he may actually do the right thing.
Post # 8
Normally I would say yes send one just to include them but his one wedding per person comment is just plain conceited so I voted a big fat No to the jerk.
Post # 9
Normally I send invites anyway to people who can’t make things beacuse I still want them to know they’re invited and thought of. But he’s an ass so i probably wouldn’t waste the stamps or paper.
Post # 10
Oh I voted before reading. Typically I would send one but in this case I wouldn’t stop subtract one of the ‘yes’ votes.
Post # 11
Yeah, I would still send one.
Post # 12
- Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May
Ouch! I originally voted yes out of etiquette or in case plans change and the guest can go. But after a comment like that? NO! Except to say, with a mentality like that your better off without that guest.
P.S. Is your uncle related to my mother. She said the same thing to me…..
Post # 14
I wouldn’t send him an invitation, but not to be spiteful or to “kill him with kindness”. He said he wouldn’t attend, so to make it clear that he was heard, I wouldn’t send him one.
Honestly, his “one wedding per person” rule makes sense to me. He may be a rude person, but that particular rule seems fine. I mean, he went to the first one, probably bought a gift, and celebrated with everyone; he doesn’t need to keep repeating those steps for the same people.
Post # 15
When you have been told that a person cannot attend, you should not send an invite. When I told a friend about my date adn she told me that she had her family reunion that weekend, I did not send her an invite. I feel like it is asking for a gift. I told her that I did not send her one, but if something changed and she became available and wanted to attend, to just let me know.