Post # 1
I know this question has been posed before, and the responses were pretty mixed on the issue.
DH and I just do not have the same vacation “ideals”. After 5 years together, there just is not much we can do to get around the situation of vacation spots. He likes one thing, I like another. End of story.
Now, we originally planned to go on one in July of 2015. It is something I have always wanted to do, a “bucket list” type of thing. But, it is NOT his idea of a good time, at all. Like, at ALL. So, I suggested going by myself. He balked at first, until I pointed out that before he came along, I took several trips by myself. Also, I didn’t want him to use him time off work for something he didn’t want to do. I accrue more time off than him, so it wouldn’t be as big of a deal for me to take 3-4 days off.
So, would this be something you and your SO would do? Why or why not? Would you be upset if your SO wanted to go on a trip alone?
Post # 2
Mrs_Amanda: Being married is not being welded at the hip to me. If we had different interests, or even just different availability, and I had the opportunity? Absolutely!
Post # 3
I just don’t think I’d have fun by myself, so I voted no. But if you enjoy vacationing alone, I don’t see anything wrong with it.
Post # 4
My husband and I are fortunate to have the same vacation “ideals” so we would never find ourselves in this type of situation. He wouldn’t be okay with me going on a vacation by myself anyway (I’ve mentioned it half jokingly, a yoga retreat) and he would not want to travel without me either. I have done girls trips with my bffs, but those are a different story.
Post # 5
I have, although we were not yet engaged. I spent 6 weeks volunteering in Guatemala. He visited and we had some adventures, but it was mostly my thing.
Post # 6
Mrs_Amanda: my fiancé and I love traveling together. It’s probaboy our favorite thing to do as a couple. i have always loved traveling. If he did not, or if we didn’t enjoy the same types of trips, I would have no problem traveling alone, with family members, friends, etc. As it is, we’ve done some “girls trips” and “boys weekends” in the time we’ve been together. If you have a dream of going somewhere, and he doesnt have any interest in going, you shouldn’t have to miss out. He can use the time you are gone to do something he enjoys.
Post # 7
It’s hard for me to say yes or no. I did a ton of trips on my own when I was younger. I now don’t want to do any more trips alone. It’s not for safety, its just that it is kind of boring anymore. I need someone to talk to and go “Did you see that cool thing? Wasn’t that a cool thing?” The last trip I was on on my own just kind of killed it for me. I spent 90% of the time wishing either DH or the friend I was originally supose to go with was there (my friend had a family emergency and couldnt’ come at the last minute.)
That said, as much as I would want it to be DH, it doesn’t have to be DH. My DH is in a simlar position to yours; He doesn’t get as much vacation time as I do. I have a good friend who I have gone on several trips with. I have also met friends I know from the area on trips.
Post # 8
If we had COMPLETELY different vacation wants I suppose I would want to take a trip with some girlfriends or other family members. I would try to compromise first to see if there is ANYWHERE we could go that we’d both enjoy, but if it wouldn’t be something he enjoyed or vice versa, separate vacations would be the way to go, I guess.
I love traveling with my husband though, so this is really hard for me to relate to. We have similar tastes.
Post # 9
What is throwing me off about the scenario is the “alone” part. I would totally go on a vacation with my best gal pal just like I encourage my husband to go camping (something I hate) with “the guys”. But I don’t think either of us would care to vacation alone.
Post # 10
Luckily for me my husband likes to travel….. As far as me taking a trip by myself…. I don’t think I would want to totally go by myself, I like the socialization. If it were a trip he didnt want to go on, it would likely end of being a girls trip.
I think if you guys are ok with it, then ok, but I think both people should compromise… for example, my husband loves Jazz, I like Jazz, but I still go to concerts… He knows he also has to go to some concerts with music I like… I also like certain types of movies and he likes others… we compromise and usually end up suprising ourselves and enjoy it.
We call it “taking one for the team”
Post # 11
In your situation I would.
My husband goes away for 3 days with my stepdad, my brother, and my cousin every year. It works fine for us.. I have zero desire to participate in the trip they take and it doesn’t interfere with our plans as a couple.
Other than that trip, we wouldn’t choose to travel seperately. We love to travel and share new experiences together.. We’re on the same page about what we like though. If we weren’t, it would be another story but I’d probably just go with him because I like being with him. Wherever that may be..
Post # 12
No. Taking FI completely out of the equation, I would not want to go on a vacation alone. I just don’t think it would be fun. For me, one of the biggest parts of a vacation is the social aspect of experiencing things together and sharing those memories. I think I would just be lonely doing everything alone. I’m also not the kind of person who is going to “make friends” where ever I go, like start hanging out with some locals or anything like that, so I suppose that factors in where my only social contact would be waiters and hotel workers, etc.
I would go on a vacation with friends or family without FI if he couldn’t get the time off or it was really something he didn’t want to do. But, in general, we enjoy the same things and I would always want him to be there if he could.
Post # 12
Mrs_Amanda: Would I feel comfortable going on vacay alone? Yes, but would I do it? No.
DH and I value eachothers time together, so if he wanted to go somewhere that I didn’t really care to go, I would go just to be with him, bc we have fun anywhere we go.
Post # 14
No. I want to experience life with him. We don’t need to be conjoined at the hip, but I don’t believe I’d enjoy myself alone without him. It’d be different if he couldn’t join me for one reason or another, but to say “I’m going on a vacation without you. Toodles!” wouldn’t fly for either one of us.
Post # 15
Mrs_Amanda: I would go alone! I may actually even like it better than going with my SO because I get to create an itinerary based on what I know I want to do. With my SO, he always says he’s happy to do whatever I want, but it also means I may not get to do everything I want 😀 sounds bratty, but it’s judt the nature of traveling with anyone!
Obviously, the preference would be to have your SO go with you, but it’s not worth it if it’s not his idea of a good time.