Post # 1
FI was visiting today, and we got on to taking about when/where to have our intimate ceremony/reception. We’re kind of under a deadline, as he wants to get married before we TTC (between Oct.-Feb.), or shortly after before I start showing..
Anyway, he kind of side-glanced me, and said, “Don’t worry about it–I’ll handle it.” Now, I don’t think he was serious, but it got me to thinking–could I give him full control? I have a buttload of ideas, and desires I want incorporated, but I think he’s grasped my vision, somewhat.. and, if he was really stuck, I’m sure he’d ask for my input! LOL!
I know there’s a TV show (‘Rich Groom, Poor Groom’) that deals with this specific idea/situation, and they offer the couple an extra $5,000 for their wedding if the groom assumes all of the responsibilities (i.e. dress, tux, transportation, venue, hair, linens, flowers, etc.). Would you go for it? Would it be worth it to you in the long-run? Or are you too Type A?
Post # 3
HELL NO! lol
I love my sweetie, I really do, but he can’t plan his way out of a paper bag.
I’m not exaggerating at all when I say that every single time he has tried to plan something, it has gone wrong to horribly wrong. I do not understand how a human can be so incapable of planning something simple like going to a friend’s house for dinner, but he’s managed to screw that up every single time as well. Now, I just take care of any planning at all. 🙂
Post # 4
for an extra $5,000? sure… our budget is small so 5,000 makes a big difference. he already knows most of the stuff i want and like, he even helped me pick out my dress. and he knows it’s gotta be disney so the planner he gets assigned to for Disney Fairytail Weddings would be a great help to him too.
Post # 5
i have my hubby full control on where we could get married
i thought a nice tropical island, the owners private landscaped garden with a view, soft music and a wedding with just the two of us and the minister
he chose for the ceremony to be in front of the dive shop (hes a scuba instructor) with the dive tank compressors running as our wedding music, on the busy side of the island so a hundred tourist were there to watch and photograph. oh and my soft music – cue drunk band including old toothless guy playing wine bottles and spoons
good thing i love the guy 🙂
Post # 6
I am definitely too controlling in the wedding planning to allow that LOL… unless I had one of those grooms that researched everything and was naturally good at this stuff, but FI…… not so much… that freaks me out just thinking about it!
Post # 7
If I can trust him enough to have kids with him and spend my life with him, I can certainly trust him to plan one day. Then again, for me, as long as at the end of the day, we both said “I do” in front of our families and I got to wear a nice dress, I didn’t mind the rest.
Post # 8
If he had a list of things that needed to be done and very specific “needs to be done by” dates then yes, absolutely. He contributed a ton to our wedding, ideas-wise, and I trust his vision. It’s just his habitual procrastination that would make me nervous.
And ditto to @mommytobee: we had a very small, laid-back, casual wedding. I don’t think I’d have had the same answer if we had planned a very large, blog-worthy formal dance party wedding. But for the wedding we wanted (and had), yes, I’d trust him.
Post # 9
I’ll admit it – I’m a tiny bit of a control freak. And my FI already has admitted he doesn’t understand or didn’t think of things when I’ve brought them up. I love him to death, but I would not be able to give him full reign to plan a party for 180 people.
Post # 10
Absolutely not! He is not a planner. He just is incapable of considering the details. Plus he does everything last minute. And… it would be IMPOSSIBLE for me to sit in the background and keep my mouth shut. lol! Heck! I planned everything for our intimate wedding in our home and when I got his ring from my drawer just before I went downstairs, something told me to check if he had taken mine. Of course he had not! I had to send my best friend downstairs with my rings to give to him because of course he left them upstairs in his dresser drawer! Did I say ABSOLUTELY NOT!?
Post # 11
I’m with @Tunacupcakes:, my SO couldn’t plan his way out of a paper bag. Every single time we’ve gone on trips and vacays, as we’re loading the car, he’ll ask: “Did you get such and such?” “Yes.” “Oh, crap, what about the other thing?!” “Got it. Packed it yesterday.” “Oh.” And then, at some point in the car ride, “We didn’t bring blahblahblah, did we?” “Yes, dear, WE did.” *rolls eyes* He’s hopeless, but cute about it, so that makes up for it 🙂
Plus, he’s a planner in other ways, that I’m just not. Like, you know, oil changes and car stuff. And the yard stuff. He’s got a great green thumb, whereas I’ve killed a cactus.
Soooo, I’m happy being the planner.
Post # 12
No way. He’s a very practical person and has said multiple times if he had it his way we’d have a casual backyard bbq. Now, I know a lot of people do that, but I explained to him that there’s a way to have a beautiful wedding but still on a budget.
He’s not a planner, either. He’s very much a ‘right here, right now’ kind of person, and only plans for the future with money and big things like kids, buying a home, etc.
I love him, but do not think he’d be able to plan our dream wedding on his own!
Post # 13
It’s not that I wouldn’t have trusted him to plan it, it’s that *I* wanted to have my hand in it – especially in the DIY department. lol He and I worked as a team on the major details – hiring vendors, choosing locations, etc – but for the details, it was all me. 🙂
Post # 14
the guy who didn’t see why paper plates didn’t fit our elegant theme and suggested evites instead of wedding invitations? NO.
Post # 14
@dodgercpkl: Ditto! I love my FI – he actually probably did a LOT better than I did in the major vendor department. But, now that we’re in the details phase, he’s losing interest. Plus, we’re buying a house at the same time, so I put him in charge of the house while I’m in charge of the wedding. Team spirit!
Post # 15
I’m a control nut. Definitely Type A personality. Love my FI to Death but Aint Happening.