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I'm curious...For those of ladies who have been ring shopping, who suggested it?

Would your DH/FI mind if you didn't wear your ring?

posted 1 year ago in Rings
  • poll: Would your DH/FI be upset?
    Heck yes! : (87 votes)
    58 %
    No, he wouldn't even notice or at least doesn't care : (29 votes)
    19 %
    I would never go ringless so this doesn't apply to me : (28 votes)
    19 %
    Other : (6 votes)
    4 %
  •  
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    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    I love my rings and I cherish what they symbolize, but the honest truth is sometimes I just don't like wearing jewelry! I know if I tried to go ringless one day though, my DH would be very upset. It would be a combination of him worrying what others would think about my suddenly not wearing a ring, the potential of random men thinking I'm single and available and darn it he spent so much money on the thing, I'd better wear it.

    I have a friend though who almost never wears her rings. She never wore it during her engagement and rarely now that she's married. Her husband doesn't seem to mind at all and she doesn't think twice about it.

    How would your DH/FI/SO feel?

     
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    hilsy85    September 2010  

    I TOTALLY know what you mean. Some days I don't feel like thinking about my rings--like making sure to take them off before I put on lotion, making sure to turn my e-ring around when I go on the train to not so good areas, etc. But my DH would also be really really upset and hurt if I didn't wear them--pretty much for the same reasons that you listed.

     
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    sdrury89    March 10, 2012   Houston, TX

    @moderndaisy: He doesn't care. I've forgotten it a couple times and he's asked why I don't have it on and when I tell him he just says okay. There's also been days where I just don't feel like wearing it (running errands, doing stuff with the dogs, going to be busy with my hands all day) and he never says anything. I think if I made it a habit and rarely wore it he'd be pretty offended though.

     
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    roxy821    August 21, 2010  

    If I take my rings off and forget to put them on DH gets a little hurt. However he has only worn his ring a handful of time since we got married!

     
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    Mrs. Spring    May 10, 2009   California

    I haven't worn my rings in over a year because I took them off when I was pregnant and still haven't found them. :( at first, my husband was kinda upset, but now I don't think he even notices it. And he hasn't replaced my ring yet, so I guess its not a big deal to him. I think he's gotten used to me not wearing a wedding ring, so its a non-issue at this point (although I would really like a replacement ring at some point!)

     
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    Neva    July 2010  

    @moderndaisy: My husband would NOT be happy at all.  We just happened to discuss this the other day.  I have a lovely diamond engagement ring, a 1.3 ct solitaire with a pave band and a matching wedding band.  I love my rings and and thrilled to wear them.

    BUT, my husband and I married in a JOP ceremony.  We haven't yet married in the church because I'm an encore and I have an anullment that is being heard.  We plan to marry in the church once it is granted.

    So I've been considering maybe wearing only a plain gold band until we are married in the church.  Because we are Catholic, according to our religion, we really aren't yet married.  So I feel a bit guilty about wearing my rings now.  And I figured it would only make our church wedding more special if I saved the rings to wear then. In the meantime, I figured I'd wear a plain white-gold band like his to symbolize that we are legally married....but it wouldn't be the full wedding set.  It made sense to me.

    But to him?  Not so much.  He was totally, TOTALLY, against it.  And mind you, I didn't even suggest going with NO ring at all, just with a plain gold band.  He still was worried that people would think he was financially unable or just too cheap to buy me nicer rings or that people would think we were fighting or going to divorce or that I didn't like being married to him.  He was so against it that I just dropped the idea.  And he wasn't mad...he just seemed so horrified...and hurt.  He really had just the saddest face.

    So I can't even imagine how hurt and upset he'd be if I ever just didn't wear my ring.  I'd not even try that.

     
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    SoontobeMrsA    June 2012   MA/NH line

    I forget to put it on a lot lately :( My fingers got fat all of the sudden lol.

    I know it bothers him so I'm trying to do better.

     
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    finnaroo    August 7, 2010   DC (living in nyc now)

    when we first got engaged, i tried to take my e-ring off at night to sleep and hubs looked like i had just taken away his puppy or something, so he would def be upset. that said, he actually doesn't care now that we're married if i don't wear all my rings, so sometimes now i just wear my band.

     
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    jo.lee    September 10, 2011   Indianapolis

    FI doesn't care if I leave mine off for a day, but I don't think he would be thrilled if I never wore it. 

     
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    DeathByDesign    February 18, 2012   Lives in Ontario, married in Quebec

    I love my ring so much, but if it's impractical to wear it, I don't. I love it so much I don't want it to get damaged or dirty!

    I always wear it otherwise though, and since I work behind a desk at a computer all day it isn't often when I'm out that I need to take it off, it's really only when I am at home doing dishes or gardening that I take it off. My FI understands and doesn't mind at all.

     
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    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    The ring is a piece of metal. There are weekends when I'm stuck at home and never put it on. He doesn't care. He does want me to wear it when we go out, but even if I don't he doesn't mind. 
    Even when we are childfree and have date night and go out drinking, he knows my bedtime routine when we get home (and I'm usually drunk) he'll take my shoes off, put me in my pajama's, and take my ring off to place it back in it's box on my nightstand. He does that with every piece of jewlery that I have on. 

     
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    AnnieAAA    October 25, 2009   Dallas, TX

    I have accidently forgotten to wear my rings & Hub def notices. He would not be comfortable w/ me being ringless & the feeling is mutual for him.

     
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    JewishBride    June 13, 2010   Michigan

    I would personally never go ringless. I don't think my husband would be comfortable with it either.

     
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    GreenEyedMoon    January 14, 2012   Dallas

    He would definitely notice, and he would definitely be upset... most of the time.  The one exception to the rule is that, because I'm an actress and my character is unmarried (and my ring is waaaay too nice and modern for her anyway), he's aware of and okay with the fact that once the show begins, I won't be able to wear it on the weekends.  I will probably just leave my ring at home all weekend so it doesn't get lost.

    Now, whether or not I will be okay with leaving my ring off is a completely different story...  I'm pretty sure I'm going to freak out and think it's lost several times.

     
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    rachiecakes    January 23, 2011   Boston

    @Miss Tattoo: that's so sweet! hehe

    I usually only wear my wedding band these days. I love my e-ring to pieces but it's a bit big and gets caught on everything, I don't want to worry about it. But people ask me all the time why I'm not wearing it.... weird

     
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    Mrs.H2B    August 4, 2012   Canada

    I wear mine almost all of the time, but since I take it off for the shower and before bed, there have been a couple of times where I've forgotten to put it back on. Once while driving I got all upset I forgot it, and he just laughed at me... because I made him turn around. He really doesn't care...although if I forgot a lot, he would probably get a bit upset since the money would be more or less going to waste.

     
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    trulyblessed    July 7, 2012  

    @moderndaisy: He would be hurt if I didn't wear it and he definitely notices when I don't have it on... Last night was so funny... I don't sleep in my ring so at night I take it off and put in back in the ring box that it came in.... but last night I wasn't feeling well so I did take off the ring but I just laid it on the night stand.... Well when I woke up this morning, the ring was nicely in the ring box... so the FI located the box when I was sleep and put the ring in the box so that it would get "missing", lol... too cute/funny...

     
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    PitBulLover    August 21, 2010  

    Sometimes Ill either forget to wear it or I just wont wear it around the house or on weekends and DH will comment on it but Im not really sure if he is upset or just joking with me. He told me the other day "I love looking down and seeing my wedding ring" which was absolutely adorable so I think he actually might be upset.

     
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    SoupyCat    February 6, 2010  

    nope, he doesn't care cause he doesn't wear his ring. i don't worry about it.

     
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    FutureMrsSitler    June 8, 2012  

    If I forgot every once in a while, I'm sure he would be fine with it, but he definitely would not want me to just not wear it regularly. But I take off my rings when I shower, clean, etc, and that doesn't bother him because he knows I am just trying to protect them!

     
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    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    Wow, it sounds like a lot of DH/FI's out there are very similar to mine when it comes to us wearing the rings! Although some voted that he wouldn't care but have not commented yet.

    I should clarify that I actually never wear my ring when I'm at home. The second I walk through the door, the first thing I do is take off my rings and other jewelry. My DH doesn't mind that at all and he also doesn't mind when we have people over and I don't wear it. I guess when we're together it's different - he doesn't have to worry about what happens when he's not present.

    Also, since my E-ring is a prong set solitaire and gets in the way, I sometimes just wear my wedding band and DH doesn't mind that either. As long as I'm wearing one or the other he's happy. But if we're going out to a nice dinner or somewhere fancy, he'll look to see that I have it on and he's always extra happy if I've cleaned it for the occasion (which I always do).

     
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    melisandescott    October 2011  

    I don't wear mine to cook, clean, shower, sleep, so I typically am not wearing my ring more often than I am.  Also, since I'm a student, and spend a lot of time at home right now, I really don't wear it that often.  I got into the habit of taking it off as soon as I got home, and there are rare days that I leave the house without it (maybe 3 times in the last year).  But, he doesn't care at all. Our joke is that I usually tell him "So I wasn't engaged to you today." And then I'll call him my boyfriend.  He wears an engagement ring on his left hand, too, and I don't care if he does or doesn't wear it. 

     
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    blg529    August 6, 2011   Los Angeles

    I went to Vegas for a weekend with some friends a few months ago and didn't bring my ring. My mom kept bugging me about it before the trip, saying things like "Vegas gets so crazy...what if you lost your ring?" I thought my fiance would freak out at the idea but he was totally cool with it; he knew it didn't mean that I didn't love him or wanted to pretend I was single for the weekend.

     
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    coffeegal85    August 11, 2012   Ohio

    My FI would not be happy.  He even notices when I don't wear the Tiffany necklace that he got me for our first Christmas - "Honey, why aren't you wearing your necklace <insert sad face>?"  He doesn't understand that necklaces can't be worn  with every neckline! :)

     
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    JenniBride    December 2011   Manitoba

    Mine doesn't care.  We got the ring mainly for the moms/nosy parkers anyway.  If i feel like wearing it, I wear it, but if I don't, I don't! 

     
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    Entangled    September 17, 2011   Carmel, CA

    He isn't upset, but he is sad.  He makes a little frowny face if he notices I don't have it on.  But he also doesn't want me to wear it doing things where it's impractical (I NEVER wear it when we play ultimate and it doesn't bother him one bit).  But if I take it off to do dishes and don't put it back on, he is all sad and then super excited when I put it back on.  I think he's paranoid I'm going to lose it.

     
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    Lee_Ann    October 20, 2012   Pittsburgh

    i've only been engaged for a about 6 weeks.  i know it's not quite the same as a wedding ring, but im not planning on wearing that  often either. reasons being:

    i can't wear them when i sleep or i can't get them off in the morning.

    i can't wear them to work because I'm an assistant pastry chef and my hands are always in dough or icing or cake batter, etc.. I know most places allow you to wear a simple band anyway, but still, i wouldn't, ick!

    i just don't see the point of wearing them for the 5 hours between work and sleep if im just sitting at home alone.

    But i do wear it when we go out to dinner or whatever...if i remember!

    so, he really doesn't mind, he understands that my job limits the time the ring spends on my finger. 

     
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    Crisark    November 5, 2011   WV

    He would not be ok with me not wearing my ring at all! I tried not to wear the right hand ring he got me one day just because I didn't feel like wearing anything and he knew right away. lol

     
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    kala_way    May 28, 2011   Manhattan Beach, CA

    I think he'd be upset. He's always looking at it and touching it :)

    When I mentioned in passing that I might only wear my wedding band after we get married and not the e-ring he looked a bit upset. I'll still wear it, just maybe not everyday and maybe not on my left hand where it's always spinning and scratching me.

     
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    mzlouis2b    November 3, 2012   Live in Brooklyn, wedding in MI

    He might notice if we were going out but if we are at home or if i randomly forget one day its not a huge deal. I actually take mine off a lot more than i expected so i do forget to put it back on from time to time.

     
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    NDBee    March 10, 2012  

    Mr.ND wouldn't even care. I was sad I had to give it up for a week to get a mold made for a band, and when I was bummed I may have to give it back for another week he's all "it's not a big deal!" Psh! But, I take it off for bed each night, and if I'm cleaning around the house, so he's used to me not wearing it at all times. (Doesn't mean I don't miss it when I don't have it with me, though!)

    ETA- He may care if it was about a fight or something, but that's about it. And I think that's a drastic move, so I highly doubt I'd do that if it really wasn't something that deserved that type of move.

     
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    MrsSl82be    October 24, 2009  

    I don't wear mine a lot, but I usually do when I'm out of the house. Hubs hardly ever wears his ring, only sometimes when we go out.

    Doesn't bother either of us really. and he can't get mad cuz he never wears his, so ha! :)

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    Depends on where we were going. I wear my ring basically all the time (except when showering or sleeping). He thought it was weird I wore it to the gym (won't you hurt it?? um.. no). Or when I'm doing crafty stuff (won't you hurt it?? um.. no). lol. I was a little worried about wearing it all the time at first until I realized that when my mom came to help me paint our house she wore her ring and diamond earrings to boot. I asked her if she didn't want to take them off and she said: why? you can't hurt diamonds. (I know technically you CAN but I don't do a lot of stuff that would really hurt them and I'd rather risk hurting it than avoid wearing my rings unnecessarily). 

    So yea... for that kind of stuff he wouldn't care at all if I didn't wear my rings. But other than that I think he'd be unhappy if I didn't wear my e-ring. He feels like the e-ring is more important than the wedding band because he picked it out himself and it was way more money, so I feel like if I started just wearing the band he'd be insulted, or if I just didn't wear either for some reason. 

    But-- no worries about that because I am still totally enamored with my rings and I love wearing them always :) 

     
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    Mrs Sarah McK    October 10, 2010   Harrisburg, PA

    @coffeegal85: DH is the same way about a necklace he bought me. 

    I don't wear my engagement ring, and that doesn't bother him at all. But he gets upset when I take off my wedding band to put on lotion or knead dough or make meatloaf or anything. And to be fair, even if it's just for short amounts of time, I feel weird not wearing it. I'm trying to prepare us both for me being pregnant and maybe not being able to wear it. 

    On the cute side, if he's home when I take it off, he always insists on putting it back on me himself. He's really superstitious about the rings. when we went to the jewelry store to get sized it was like pulling teeth to get him to try anything on. And he almost threw a fit when I made him try on his band when we got it in. He was very adamant that nothing be put on his ring finger until his wife (me, obviously) put his wedding band on at his (our) wedding. The day at the jewelry shop was the first time he'd put anything on that finger, ever. 

     
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    FutureMrsMcDermott    February 2016  

    FI notices EVERY time I forget to wear mine and reminds me to put it on. It doesn't bother me, I love my rock! :D

     
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    JamieL17    October 1, 2011   OH

    I take mine off as soon as I get home, and sometimes I forget to put it back on when I leave the house. FI doesn't care, but he always notices. My ring also isn't insured yet (long story) so maybe he just feels relieved when I leave it at home because I'm less likely to lose it :)

     
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    Wonderstruck    September 18, 2011   Detroit, MI

    I always wear mine, but I can imagine FI would be a bit upset if I just stopped wearing the ring he spent over a grand on, that I picked out!

     
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    Lindsay12.31.2010    December 31, 2010   Missouri

    I take mine off the moment I walk in the door, and he hates that! Mine has such a high setting, and I am always whacking it on something. 

    I rarely forget to wear it outside the house, but he would most definitely notice and make a comment. 

     
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    KatNewby    July 15, 2014   Michigan (For Now)

    I don't have my ring yet, but the ring I am getting will be micro-pave and hold a 3ct. stone. My SO plans on spending a pretty penny on it so he would be really really sad if I didn't wear it! We have both worked so hard to put it on my finger. I'm going to love it sooooo much though, I can't imagine not wearing it! On the other hand though, I probably will not wear my ring all around the house or at work because I work with my hands & I don't want to risk losing the pave.

     
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    KatyElle      

    He would never notice anyway, and doesn't care either way. A ring doesn't change your marital status.

     

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