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i'm an attorney and would find it a bit pretentious. but if you do want to add that sort of formality you have to make sure to extend it to your guess, which could become tons of work. Dr., PhD, etc.
i'm an attorney also and i think that's a bit pretentious for me (actually a lot), but hey if it works for other people the most i can do is giggle a little bit.
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I'm not an attorney, but I would find that pretentious if I received it in the mail! To me, that's like me putting John Doe, PharmD on ours for my fiance's doctor of pharmacy degree...lame-o!
My fiance and I are both lawyers and there is NO WAY we would put that on an invitation! Ha ha! Lawyers have such bad reps that we try to avoid telling people what we do! Just kidding! Maybe they're both just really proud of that degree...or they really feel like it defines who they are as people. To each their own, but personally I'm still in denial that I'm a lawyer. 
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Okay, so apparantly I'm not the only one who feels this way. :)
Now for some advice - how do I gently tell her this without offending her?
Esquire on the invitations? Is that the rule? At my firm, we never use esquire, and I think it would be weird to do so on the invitations.
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Wait, So it should be:
Mr. Chucky Cheese Esquire ... .... ??? That's how you address a lawyer? Hmm, never knew that.
I have some lawyers in the family and some invited, should I put that? I've never heard that in my life.
I know it is Dr. and Mrs. Chucky Cheese .... never heard of Esquire.
I'm not sure it's your place to tell her. It's her invitation and she can do what she wants. If it comes up in conversation or if she specially asks you, you could say something like "I've never seen that done before" or "Do you use the Esquire title a lot? It's so formal." Or something that brings it up without sounding like you're passing judgment. I don't know...that's a tough one.
I wouldn't tell her not to do it, but also I wouldn't use it on your own invitations.
I think it's a teeny bit pretentious to have on an invitation, but I don't know the best way to address this with your friend. I have seen people listed as "Doctor So-and-so" on invitations before and I guess this is technically correct as the legal equivalent. My sister is an attorney and I asked her--she also thought it was a little pretentious. I did address her invite to "Sister, Esquire" because I know she likes it. Although I do think it's a bit different if you're addressing something to someone and listing your own name on the invitation.
Oh my goodness... no, no, never, never!
Perhaps if she asks about how you are addressing your invites then you could throw it in there that you are omitting "Esq." due to your personal preference?
Haha my FI is a lawyer too & it sounds like its common for a lot of lawyers to be "anti-attorney". I understand that she is proud of her accomplishments, but I'm sure everyone who knows her already knows of her hard work & title!
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I would maybe point out that it seems a bit strange to you, given that you rarely see invitations with things like August Bride, PhD or August Bride, MD. Putting it in perspective like that may help her make a more informed decision.
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Well, I asked her about it, and it was a losing battle. She said this is what defines them and that she is very proud of that "distinction". Oh well. I tried to save her from the judgment of others. :)
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my fiance is an attorney and he hates the use of Esquire... so needless to say that wasn't on the invites. for him or his dad (also an attorney). i think its a bit much.
So funny! I second the sentiments of everyone else who thinks it's pretentious to put "esquire" at the end of the names. But I have a funny related story.
I just graduated from law school and invited a friend from law school to a an upcoming shower that another non-law school friend is throwing for me. The law girlfriend emailed me her address as Suzy Q, Esquire, etc. with esquire on the end as a joke since we had just graduated. I forwarded it to the shower-thrower as it was, assuming that she would get the joke and take it off. So then my friend gets her invitation and was dying with laughter that it said Esquire on the front! She was like, I hope your friend didn't think I was being serious! :)
August15, I think you are smart to just keep it low key. People have enough reasons not to like lawyers . . . haha.
My fiance and I are both attorneys and met in law school. I would never even think to put that on my invite! You wouldn't put "Bride, PhD". It's the same thing!
The people who know you already know you're a lawyer...and I'm sure they're already impressed :)
Um never! I am an atty and so is my dad - he didn't list it on the invitation when my sister got married and I wouldn't that I am an Esq. or that he is on mine either. (In fact I wouldn't even put it on an invite I am addressing to someone....)
My husband, BIL and FIL would never use it. We certainly didn't use it on our invitations. Too much!
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My fiance is a lawyer, and we're not using "esquire". It is very pretentious, and everyone already knows he's a lawyer.
ooh- yeah, my hubby is an attorney and I'm a doctor and we never used anything designating either one. She can do as she likes, but guests will give a little "oh wow" giggle when they see it.
As an update we just rec'd invites for two August weddings. (Reminder, my FI is a Dr. and I'm a lawyer)
1. Two doctors getting married - no use of Dr. in their invitation (but they did use Dr. when referring to their parents). On the invite envelope, FI was addressed as Dr. but no Esq. was used with my name.
2. Lawyer and non-lawyer getting married - no use of Esq. on the invitation (but they did use Dr. when referring to a parent). On the invite envelope, FI was addressed as Dr. and I was addessed as Esq.
I'm going to echo the sentiments of everyone here. I'm a lawyer and I only use Esq in a professional setting. I would never dream of putting on the invites. I would use it to address a guest's invite however. I know a lot of attorneys are really proud of their accomplishments because we all worked so hard to get where we are, but I would think that everyone already knows that and there's no need to put that on the invite. My parents did put it on the invite for my bar passage party but that was clearly a situation where it was relevant.
if you're looking for a point of etiquette you can pass on to your friend, here's this--traditionally, professional titles are not used in purely social situations, and a wedding is most certainly a social event! I agree that it seems a bit pretentious and out of place. But as others have said, i'ts her wedding, so it may be best to keep quiet and just giggle in private. :)
I am an attorney and my FI has a PhD. We will be using neither title in our invitations because yes, we think it's pretentious. While that may define some people, I think these distinctions are really meant for the professional setting.
But, I must agree with the pp, that it is her invitations, and up to her to suffer any judgment that may pass as a result.
I think you've done your part, it might be better to use let it be.
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Totally pretentious - sorry, but your friend is going to get judged for this move!
I am a lawyer and I would never want that distinction on my wedding invitation!!! I think it will look terribly out of place. *Blushingaudrey* is right - etiquette-wise, this is a faux pas for sure!
Unfortunately, I don't think you can tell your friend this - she will just have to make this pretentious mistake and live with it!
I agree with everyone that it is very pretentious! I know it's not quite the same, but made me think of how silly it would be for me to word my invite as Bride, MBA. 
In Canada at least, you never see lawyers referring to themselves as 'Esquire'. Not only that, it isn't a title you can give to yourself, but a form of address that is applied to anyone (not just lawyers) to whom the writer wishes to show respect. So, no, she shouldn't be referring to herself as 'Esquire'!
Ooooh, don't do it - not even on the envelopes! The only professional titles that are proper for social stationary are:
Ok so as a recent law school graduate I'm of two minds. I certainly agree that it's unusual to include this on your invites and probably goes against the proper etiquette, but I also understand how she could be excited to be an esquire. Now to be fair, I don't know how long this woman has been an attorney, but I still think it's a fun exciting thing to say. If she wants to put it on her invitations, there's probably a reason and I don't think it's really a big deal.
However, with that being said, I would not put them on my invitations (and yes my fiance and I are both about to be attorneys - hopefully)
Esquire isn't a title you use on invitations, even to address them. Just Doctor, Congresspeople and judges. Everyone else is a Miss, Mr. or Mrs., and lawyers just have to accept that they are regular people too! (Esquire is for your business cards or resume! Not your wedding invitations!)
If someone else is addressing me in my professional capacity, then 2d Bride, Esq. is fine. Socially, it would be Ms. 2d Bride. However, if I am referring to myself, I would leave the titles off altogether. Referring to yourself by a title just seems pretentious to me.
You never use ", Esq." when referring to yourself. Never. Ever. It's a well known faux pas, well known enough that I would probably mock the person.
You do use ", Esq." when addressing someone else who is an attorney.
Oops. Didn't realize that this thread was dead and recently revived. Good to spread again, though.
My husband and I are newish attorneys and we're proud of ourselves and all, but we would never, ever have refered to ourselves as esquires on our wedding invitations. People are going to laugh at anybody who does that, for sure.
I guess no one around here has any strong opinions on the issue so I'll offer this: 
As a fellow attorney, I have been taught that Esquire is used as a sign of respect. It is to be used when addressing others, but never to be used to identify yourself. I know that others don't share this viewpoint, but I never sign anything Bestforlast, Esquire - not even pleadings. However, I always address opposing counsel or others as Esquire.
Let your coworker do what she wants. You've done your best, right? Sigh. Some people...
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I am an attorney, but still getting used to all the formalized uses of "esquire".
Another girl in my office is getting married and plans to put on the invitations and save-the-dates:
Please join us for the marriage of:
Bride, Esquire
and
Groom, Esquire
I understand putting it on someone's name when you address their invitation, but on your own invitation? Am I the only one that thinks this is a bit pretentious?