Post # 1
So I can’t help but notice so many of you dating/engaged folks have been with your SO’s for quite a while! 5, 10 years seems to be nothing.
I was with my boyfriend 2.5 years before getting engaged and we will have been dating for just about 4 years exactly when we get married. We actually tossed around the idea of eloping at around the year mark, but our parents weren’t happy with that at all so we called it off. Now we’re going ahead with a full wedding and everything, and while I’m happy we are doing things more “properly” (graduated, jobs, living together, etc) I can’t help but think our relationship would have been just fine if we had decided to go ahead and get married haha.
One piece of advise I actually got while we were still dating was to not wait to long. A friend of mine dated her partner for 10 years before getting engaged, and she said on the day of the wedding it just felt sort of silly and frivolous since they had already started their lives together a long time ago. Of course people can wait 20+ years and still have a beautiful wedding day, I just know that for me and FI and our friends, the longer the wait the less that marriage license truly makes a difference in the relationship.
So I was hoping to hear some bees who on the other side of the dating-period fence, do you think your grass is greener? Or did 5+ years just happen to float your boat? What in your life were you waiting for before you decided it was right?
Post # 3
7 yrs, 3 months. we were in school for 5 of those years & he apparently wanted us to be secure financially and in our jobs, etc. before proposing.
Post # 4
5 years and a few months, but for the first year we dated long didstance so it wasn’t like a full year.
Post # 5
We are together for 4 yrs, and it will be closer to 5 by the time we are engaged. We set our future wedding date as our 7 year anniversary.
We did start our lives together a long time ago, but why does that matter? The wedding license may not make a huge difference in our lifestyle, but it is symbolizes the start of our family and married life. It won’t seem silly to me at all.
Post # 6
We dated for… nearly six years before getting engaged. It’ll be over seven by the time we get married. We started dating at age 22 and were both so focused on our graduate studies that although we knew by year two that this was it, we both prioritized our education over the ceremony and party. We’ll be 29 years old when we finally tie the knot this coming February.
The official agreement was that one of us had to have a PhD before getting engaged. And we stuck to it! Am I happy that we waited so long? Absolutely. It gave us time to grow up, mature, and really figure out who we were as individuals before making it legal. It feels right now. It would not have felt right when we were both mid-program with bigger (metaphorical) fish to fry.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!
7 1/2 years. I’ve been in school for all of them and moved around for undergrad and then my master’s. Timing wasn’t right until last summer.
Post # 8
Together for 3 years, but knew we were getting married within the first 6 months. It just wasn’t the right time for us. We’ll have been dating 4.5 years when we get married. I wanted a longer engagement.
Post # 9
We first dated in 2002 when I was in high school and he was in college but broke up shortly after. We are getting married (not entirely on purpose) on our fourth anniversary, this time around. It’s also my parents 30th wedding anniversary weekend, so it feels like a special time. I’m glad we are not waiting too much longer than that to be married because the questions were beginning to get tiresome. One, because of our history, and two, our ages. We are by no means old, but I will be in my late 20s and he in his early 30s when we wed. Our families definitely feel as if that is time enough!! Most of my friends are still single though, so I would have felt ok waiting, if we had needed to. If we got together younger, we would have waited much longer.
Post # 10
we were together for over 7.5 years before we got engaged, will be together over 9 years by the wedding. Thats just the way it worked out for us, we started dating while i was still in high school and he proposed the day I finished my last law school exam.
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID
@chickspartan: I think if the marriage license is going to make a difference for a couple, it wouldn’t how long they’ve been together.
We’ll be engaged by the time 3 years hits, but I have no idea when we’ll get married. The timing isn’t right at the moment to have a wedding.
Post # 12
My SO and I dated for 8 months before we got engaged. When we get married we’ll have been together for 1 year and 4 months.
However, we were very close friends for about 2 years before we started dating. I don’t know if that counts?
I’m excited that we got engaged/married so quickly. I love that in five years I’ll be able to say “we’ve been married for 5 years” as opposed to “we’ve been dating for 5 years.” You know what they say…when you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible!
Post # 13
It’ll be about 6 years by the time we get engaged. We did long distance for the first 5 years and have been living together the last 7 months. Want to get our ducks in a row before taking the next step
Post # 14
We were together for 15 months when we got engaged (SUPER fast!), and got married a month shy of 2 years together!
Post # 15
My FI and I met a month after starting undergraduate school. We dated throughout the entire time we were both in school and he proposed on our 5 year anniversary. We needed that time to grow up with each other and figure out what we really wanted, not to mention that we both wanted to be certain that by the time we were married we would no longer be in a LDR. If all things go as planned, we’ll be moving in six months to a new city and a new state and then be married ten months after that. (:
Post # 16
we dated for a year and 11 months before we got engaged. I got engaged at 20. We have been together over 7 years. Married for 4.5.