You want a tattoo. SO is againt it. What happens next

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: What happens next?
    I would get the tattoo, no question about it : (34 votes)
    9 %
    I would consider SO's opinion, but it's ultimately my choice : (248 votes)
    66 %
    I would not get it but be bitter : (12 votes)
    3 %
    I would not get it, no question about it : (64 votes)
    17 %
    I'm not sure : (10 votes)
    3 %
    Other : (5 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    931 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    If I were only dating, I would get it regardless.   Married, I would consider his opinions more, but would still get it because he doesn’t “own” my body or anything.

    Although, it might be different depending on the reasons he would be against it.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2132 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I’d be a lot less likely to get it, but still might depending on what it is & why he’s against it. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    7090 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    DH wants a big tattoo on his forearm or a full sleeve, which I’m not super excited about. I’ve been politely discouraging it, haha.

    Post # 7
    Member
    8706 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Dating: I would still get it.

     

    Married: I would not get it. It has nothing to do with owning my body or owning me, but with respect. If my husband feels that strongly to ask me to not do it, I wouldn’t.

     

    My husband once brought up using an e-cigarette (He doesn’t smoke) and I was very adament that he did not do it. So, he doesn’t.

     

    Mutual respect gets you everywhere.

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    332 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2014 - Sea Ranch Lodge

    If we were married, I absoloutely not get it.

    Otherwise, I would strongly consider his opinion.

    Either way, I would never get a tattoo.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3978 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I would personally have a hard time dating someone that got a tattoo (or marrying them for that matter), unless I truly understand why they were getting it and what and where. To me, personally, while I think tattoo can be an amazing art form, I don’t love anything that much that I could make it permanent. To me, it’s a waste of money and a permanent “scar’ on your body. My FI and I have the same feelings about it, and when I asked how he would feel if I wanted a tattoo, he said he would be really upset and disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, I’m friends with people with tons of tattoos! I just think I couldn’t do it and I wouldn’t want to be with someone that really wanted one– had that difference in opinion about I guess the value of  keeping the body unadorned (i’m not big into piercings either).

    Post # 10
    Member
    2973 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @Laurenplusalex:  this is my current situation. I want a tattoo, but no one around me (especially FH) wants me to. All i hear is negative connotations, and ‘ruining my body’….or whatever. And it’s just sad. FH is the one that has to look at it, so if it would weird him out, I won’t do it. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    3673 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I would try to negotiate a compromise. For example, get it smaller or in a place that can easily be covered up.

    Post # 12
    Member
    605 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    I am not married but even if I was.. its my body and I will get one if I want to.. same goes for my SO.. he has a tattoo that I’m not too fond of but hey.. it’s not my body! 

    Post # 13
    Member
    980 posts
    Busy bee

    My body, my choice. 

    He can love it or hate it but it’s not his body to decide what does or doesn’t go on it. I would listen to why he didn’t want me to get it, but unless he could prove it was racist/crude/incorrect I would still be getting it.

    Post # 14
    Hostess
    4941 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @Laurenplusalex:  I had one tattoo when I started dating DH. About half way through our relationship I decided I wanted to get a sparrow tattoo with a breast cancer ribbon in honor of my Aunt who passed away. He was really against it (he HATES tattoos on women), but he gave in and said it was ultimately my body and my choice. 

     

    Now that we’re married I’m planning on getting part of our vows tattooed in a bracelet style around my left wrist. I haven’t really told him yet because I want to finalize the design first, but I have a feeling that it’ll be the same reaction. I respect his opinion, but he also respects me in that it’s something that I want and is important to me. 

     

    He knows that I’d never get permanently inked with a piece that doesn’t mean a lot to me. And as much as I value his opinion, it’s still my body and it’s a way to express things that are important to me. I’m not going out and getting a carebear tattoo, it’s all things that have a meaningful story. I also intend on getting at least three more as well as the vows around my wrist. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    2687 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID

    No matter what, I’d get it if I want it. Whether it’s dating or not, I’d obviously listen to his opinions about it, but it’s my body, and I do what I want. I have 6 tattoos, though, so it was something he obviously knew about before we started dating. Luckily he loves my tattoos. 🙂

    Post # 16
    Member
    2189 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2017

    I’d get the tattoo. Then I’d get a GIANT fake one to put right on my neck and pretend that was the tattoo I got, then be like “Just kidding, stop being a weener.” and show him the real one.

    I happen to already have a big tattoo on my neck so that wouldn’t work for me, but if I were the girl with no tattoos.

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