You will not believe the freaken sh*t that's happening to me

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Oh my goodness.

First of all let me say I am so so so sorry about everything that’s happening. If you’ve put deposits on anything, could you explain your situation and possibly get some or all of the deposits back?

I empathise with your family situation. I am a young bride, and both sets of parents want nothing to do with our wedding (it’s still a few years away but any time we mention something related they just tune us out like we’re children) and it is really hurtful. I hope your parents eventually understand that they can’t just invite whomever they please. 

I’m currently in debt with my school so I can’t go back until it’s been paid off but I completely understand where you’re coming from with the tests! The best thing I can suggest would be to slow down and take a breath before every question. Close your eyes for a bit to visualise an answer. Take as much time is provided to you. 

I sincerely hope everything works out. All the best. 

Post # 4
Member
4413 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Oh no. I can’t even imagine and I’m so sorry to hear that your plans are disintegrating.

At this point, would eloping be an option you would consider? It seems like the universe is conspiring against you, and perhaps you might consider just waving the white flag and going with your FI to a quiet beach somewhere and saying your vows in peace! Have a big vow renewal in a few years when youre done with school and you’ve got money to spare?

if not, I’m crossing my fingers that you can find a venue and can still have a beautiful wedding, even if it’s not quite what you first pictured. Everything always finds a way to work out 🙂

Post # 5
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

AClove:  I’m 20 🙂 Hello fellow young bride. 

A suggestion of mine is to keep your original wedding date and go to the courts to do the legal marriage. Nobody has to be there, and at least you won’t be as upset when the date passes. Then in a year or two, plan your wedding again, and do a ceremony in front of family and friends. This way you’ll have a couple of years to save up and have an even better wedding. And who knows, maybe your parents will be more amenable to the idea when you’re a tad older. I know my parents would. 

Again, I’m so sorry for all of this. I’ve been through stressful times and it sometimes gets to the point where I can’t handle another bad thing, and then another bad thing happens. Lean on your FI for support and know that in the end what matters is that you two are together, healthy and happy. 

Post # 6
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

Omg, I am so sorry that this is happening to you, especially so close to your wedding. Planning a wedding is stress ful enough without all this added stress and then going through such a rigorous academic program , it must be exhausting. 

I understand what you’re going through with your family. My parents freaked out on me too when I told them they needed to cut down their guest list, and also seem to be in denial about my wedding. I’m also a fairly young bride and they seem to be having a hard time with me getting married so soon. I really hope you can get it sorted with them, maybe talk to them about why you feel hurt and you need their support now more than ever?

 

Post # 9
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

AClove:  If there’s tickets booked then I say find a family member’s backyard and jazz it up with some florals and food, or call around to find a hall that could take you. Cancelling flight tickets now is impossible. 

Post # 10
Member
7216 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m so sorry…

If it’s a well known venue, is it possible that some other venues will have heard about the bankruptcy and be extra helpful? (Of course it’s also possible they take advantage of it and overcharge, but there are a lot of decent business owners in the world). All you (and your fiance and maybe some helpful best friends) can do is phone around and try.

Post # 11
Member
47 posts
Newbee

Call every wedding planner in your area and beg one of them to find you a venue. It is an added cost, but at this point- its worth it to save your event and hopefullly one of them have a hidden gem that will help ease the dissapointment in what was your dream location. Reach out to the vendors you booked as well, and ask them for reccomendations- but if you can afford it, I would go the wedding planner route since they can spend all day on the phone tomorrow instead of you- trying to find you something!!!!

Post # 12
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

I agree of calling local venues and asking for help, or finding a backyard and fixing it up. August is a beautiful month for an backyard wedding

Post # 13
Member
8720 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

AClove:  I’m not sure where you are but here in nYC a popular wedding venue was shit down a month ago unexpectedly. I know other vendors quickly offered to help brides who had their weddings booked for there at very low prices. Maybe something similar will happen in your area? I know it won’t be your dream venue but you will be able to have your reception with your vendors you’ve probably put down deposits for. I would keep calm and start making every phone call you can think of!

Post # 14
Member
387 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014 - Windstar on Naples bay

I went through 3 churches. My hair dresser canceled 9 days before and my new hair dresser told me not to bother with a hair trial. 

Take a deep breath. Panicking to the point of making yourself sick won’t help. I almost cut my fingers off 3 days before the wedding at work Because I was super distracted. luckily the bruising and swollen-ness weren’t that noticeable

i second the calling around and trying to see if there’s another venue. That can help. Never know until you try. If your wedding was on a Saturday can you see if there is a Sunday available somewhere. That way people who booked their flights should still be in town? And the date isn’t too different?

also I’d see about the legal ramifications of not having your contract fulfilled. Dont know how much money you can get back if they are bankrupt but their must be something they can do?? 

But please take a deep breath. 

Post # 15
Member
4223 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Uuggghhh I would just elope already. I’m so sorry. 

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