(Closed) Your role in ceremony wording?

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

DH and I were very involved in our ceremony wording as there were some things that we wanted to make sure were included and there were others that we didn’t care for.  Our officiant was put off a little by it (because I think he thought he would be a little more in charge than he was) but who cares, it was our day.  Go with your gut and don’t be afraid to speak up.

Post # 4
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

We used a non-denominational officiant, too, and we completely wrote our ceremony (using samples from the internet, lol). I would just re-word it, chop sections and add some. He won’t be offended at all.

Post # 6
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

We’re planning on writing our ceremony. When we interview prospective officiants that’ll be a major question–if they’re not okay with it, then it’s likely they won’t be hired.

It’s a simple matter of services for hire–being respectful of his or her position is a good idea, but in the end you are the customer and this is a very big thing to not be happy about in the end. Make sure that you’ve got any state requirements out of the way (the consent portion, for instance, is a required element a lot of places), otherwise push for the ceremony that you want.

Post # 7
Member
2550 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Our officiant provided a template and I used it to create our vows.  i actually had to addmore poems to extend the ceremony. Our ministerwas very accomdating.

Post # 8
Member
656 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

It’s your wedding, he gets to say what you want him to say. 😀

Our officiant was my high school pastor and my husbands mentor, and we pretty much let him have his way. We gave him a few things we wanted to incorporate, and he ran with it. He knocked it out of the park.

Post # 9
Member
7312 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

You are paying this person for a service. I am sure he/she wants you to get exactly what you want, so edit away.

Post # 10
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

This is the first place I had ever heard of someone writing their own ceremony.  It’s a little weird to me.. kind of insincere maybe?  I don’t know.  We just told the pastor what vows we wanted and trusted him to take it from there and he was great. 

If he asked you to tweak it then I think it is fine to do so.

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