- 5 years ago
Yeah, I’m gonna go undercover for this one. I haven’t been around the hive for long, but better safe than sorry.
I’ve been working in my current contract since January, filling in for someone who’s on loan to another area. I also worked at the same place for 6 months last year. From the start of this contract, I’ve had loads of good feedback, put forward some ideas that have been implemented and gotten along with almost everybody. A few months ago, my supervisor pulled me aside and said she was so happy, and she’d have no problem with giving me a full time job if it came up.
The office dynamic has shifted over the past few months. Everyone’s been stressed, morale has been low, and there’s been a lot of snark. While I did my best to rise above it all, I’m ashamed to say I got caught up in it after awhile. I was frustrated that I was working my ass off to cover people (who have permanent jobs) who were being lazy in their own roles, and I said so. It was perceived to be bullying. I spoke to my supervisor and said that yes, I got caught up in it – I’m always happy to admit where I’m wrong, made mistakes etc – and made a real effort to untangle myself from it and just focus on my own stuff. Everyone got a talking to about this, not just me. The real issue I feel is that my supervisor won’t actually address any performance issues, she just brushes it off and never listens to anyone’s concerns.
Fast forward a couple of months, and the girl I’m filling in for isn’t coming back for at least another 18 months. For that period of time, management decided to advertise the job, both internally and to the public. I put in my application, along with two of my colleagues and 106 other people.
I didn’t even make it to interview, and neither did my colleagues. The “feedback” I received was hazy at best. I missed out because they had applicants that worked for a similar business for 10+ years, but not ours (for Aussie bees, state goverment employees, and I work for local government). I got told I was a terrific person, who brought great ideas to the team, did everything I was asked, and they’re really sad to lose me, but no thanks, you’re not getting the chance to stay. My colleagues are in more junior positions, despite doing the same job, but they’re permanent and will be staying on. They both feel the same as I do, for the record. There’s also a good chance that another member of the team will be moving to a new permanent position, and I basically got told not to bother applying for her existing job when it comes up.
There’s still a lot of tension in the office, but I’ve been able to stay right out of it this time, which my supervisor has noticed and told me so today. She’s more than happy to give me a great reference (she already has for one job that I only JUST missed out on getting), but she doesn’t want me.
To rub salt in, my supervisor and her superior are the worst gossips out there. They’ve both been known to run others down on many an occasion. For example, there’s been one small part of my role I’ve struggled with, and despite my best efforts, I continued to struggle. Instead of trying to build my confidence so I could overcome it, my supervisor laughed and joked about it constantly to my face until I said it wasn’t funny anymore. So it feels like a case of do as I say, not as I do.
They’ve also said they’d prefer an older person who isn’t in their childbearing years. I’m in my mid-20’s.
I’m not a bully. I’ve been bullied in the workplace, and I wouldn’t wish that on anybody. A few moments of frustration where I was pissed off because my supervisor wouldn’t step in and keep people on task has cost me my job.
I just needed to vent. I’m pissed off that I wasn’t given a real reason. There was no negative feedback AT ALL. They acknowledged I improved in the one area I needed to and they were happy with me. I knew it was coming the moment they said they were opening the job to the public, and when I told my supervisor I wasn’t surprised at all at the outcome, she just looked at me. It wouldn’t have mattered if I just sat at my desk, didn’t say boo to anybody and kissed as much ass as possible, I still wouldn’t have gotten the job. I feel like my knock back was sugarcoated, and if I went to her superior, I’d get another sugarcoated response. I’m thinking of talking to the department manager when he gets back from leave, and just give feedback on the team in general and how it’s run. I also think he needs to hear the childbearing age comment. I’m leaving anyway, so I may as well say what I really think on the way out. If I don’t go straight to him about it, I know it’ll fall on deaf ears. My feedback in the past has been ignored.
If I was good enough to work for you for 18 months to rave reviews, why all of a sudden am I not good enough to stay for another 18?
Contract work is stupid. I’ve been doing it for 3 years, and while I have so much experience and have grown a lot both professionally and personally, I’m more than ready to have another job that is just MINE. With my own desk. And not feel like an outsider all the time…