- 7 years ago
- Wedding: May 2016
Ok – this is just a short vent about my yucky morning beofre heading to work. Niether SO nor I are morning people. I get by with mono syllables and have trained most of my co workers that I am not someone to talk to until after 9AM. I have a wake-reflex auto pilot, where I can get dressed and drive to work, but I can’t hold a conversation and be alert enough to know (or care) what I’m saying, and frankly, some morning siwth allergies, talking isn’t even comfortable for a full hour. SO is the kind of person who can sleep through an alarm by his head, so he’s asked me, the ligt sleeper, to wake him each morning. After a few months, thi leads to a cranky morning arguemnt about how I’m waking him rudely (I rub his back until he changes his breathing from sleep to awake, and then quietly announce the time, I do this for about 30 minutes), leading to a stupid morning argument of How else can I possibly wake you? Don’t wake me, then. Well, fine, I won’t.
Since the time change, he’s decided to shower in the mornings, which really means, go sleep in the shower for 15 more minutes, then shave 15 minutes and get out. So I try to get him up in time to get into the shower, and still have time to get out and to work on time – no good lately. I partly balme the time change, I DO admit to being cranky now and then about being late (some days I can get by with it, but when it’s a full week of 5-20 mins late, it gets noticed), but lately have been so maladjusted and tired due to the lack of morning sun that I really don’t care – I’ve been in a decent mood, even when we got to work 20 mins late yesterday.
Today, resolving to ot be noticably late again, I put a little more effort into waking him, partly because he was making nightmare sounds and deep sleep breathing sounds, telling me that my gentle nudge wasn’t doing the job. Both of us have been under the weather with allergies and morning sore throats (his seems worse), so I have been even less inclined to speak except to mention the time and ask how he’s feeling, both while he’s still in bed, and later when he’s in the shower, as we have no clock in there. Apparently this morning I was “rude” with the simple announcement of it being 7:45, and he got the impression that I stormed out the bathroom. I actually stood there, brushing my teeth, and asked him again how he’s feeling. He said terrible. A few minutes later, I go back ot the bathroom for some make up and get asked why I’m angry with him – I say I’m not. He tells me I was rude just a few minutes ago – I tell him I’m not mad, I just told him the time as always and I brushed my teeth, as always. I said maybe he was mad at me for waking him up, and then things blew up from there. It’s already past 8 by this time, I was getting my breakfast packed into my purse, anticipating another 15 min wait for him to join me in the car and head to our work (our offices are across the street from each other). He tells me he’s not going, so my being late can’t be his fault, I tell him that he didn’t tell me till 8, after we were already late. Grrr. I told him I hadn’t started out as mad, that I was sore from running and didn’t feel well myself, nor was I a morning person, as he well knows, and I went to work, where now I’m now typing, searching my hazey-morning fogged brain to make sure I’m remembering the events as they happened correctly.
I know he’s feeling pretty sick, like he’s got a head cold lately, I know he’s got a big deadline tomorrow to finish up and he’s stressed about that, feeling bad, about having to call in with this deadline, but that’s no reason to pick a fight with me. I was really not in a bad mood. I was not relishing the thought of being late, again, with evaluations coming up soon, but I was really too tired to care too much this morning. I really think he projected his anger at feeling bad when he really shouldn’t miss work at me, and is now claiming he doesn’t want to be woken up (fine with me, I can sleep later – I set the alarm for his darn shower – I can get ready in 30 mins on the outside), and that he wants to get to work on his own (we share my car), we live walking distance, but it’s just stubborn and stupid. So yay – morning.