Post # 1
I proposed to my wife a little over a year ago.
We had been dating for several years, and I got her father’s approval a few weeks in advance. I had been trying to execute all sorts of different plans to propose in a way that she’d like, but for one reason or another they never panned out.
One night she came over and was very upset about how things in her life were going, and I pulled out the ring and said something along the lines of “things aren’t that bad” and then there was some awkward bumbling at which point she put on the ring herself and I never even got to ask if she would marry me. We had talked about it a lot before this, and she accepted my proposal.
Then, there were tears. We drove around for a bit. I felt awful, she was disappointed with the timing (even though she kept repeating that everything was okay.) We agreed that we’d do a re-do at a better time, and with her agreement, I took the ring back.
That weekend, we went to a local amusement park and I proposed again. This turned out much better, but we both knew it was going to happen. When people ask how the proposal went, we use the second proposal story and people generally gush.
While the second proposal was good, we both feel like there was something missing; the WOW factor, if you will. I still feel awful; that I stole an event away from her that she can’t ever get back.
We’ve been married just about a year now, and on asking what we’d get each other, she mentioned that she’d like another proposal. We’re going out of town this Friday and our anniversary is coming up shortly after.
I’d love to hear some ideas for how to knock her off her feet with another proposal. I’m not very good with these things.
Help me Wedding Bee!
Post # 3
- Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia
I take it your wife is a hopeless romantic! What are her favourite romantic movies?
If you are going to fly away with her on a vacation, you could try do something similar to what Adam Sandler did with the PA on the plane in the Wedding Singer. 🙂
Post # 4
@violetshanty: Does she want a huge public proposal?
Bc I think that an intimate, well-thought out proposal in your favourite place with a lot of personal touches (food/wine she loves, cake from your wedding, romantic music, her favourite flowers, a handwritten card/letter, etc.) is just lovely and will definitely knock her socks off (esp. since you are working so hard to give her her “perfect proposal”).
Post # 5
Uhm. Call me cynical. But I think the ship has sailed.
Are you planning on asking her ‘will you marry me?’..
‘I think in this situation i would be doing something like a big romantic gesture to explain feelingsand promise ongoing commitment… But I have no idea what kind of question you would ask. You are already married. And asking her something like ‘will you spend your life with me?’ Or something… Well that was already established at the wedding. Sorry to be a negative Nelly…
Post # 6
What about a private vow renewal? A romantic trip somewhere perhaps? Maybe she’s just asking for more romantic gestures. If I’m being honest, I also agree that there shouldn’t have to be a re-proposal at this point!
Post # 7
How can you prpoose to her when you are already married? Makes no sense to me. Sorry, but your wife seems like a real piece of work. She needs to get over the fact the propsal wasn’t what she’d hoped, it’s kind of a ridiculous thing to be obsessing over still after you’ve already been married for a year.
Post # 8
@MrsWBS: I’m going to agree with you here.
In all honesty, how often do people ask you about the proposal after the wedding? I’m not married yet, but even right after the engagement everyone was far more concerned with the ring than they were with the proposal.
OP, if you feel like you need to re-do something, I would recommend a private vow-renewal at some tropical destination. You really can’t re-do a proposal after you are already married (you know b/c asking “will you marry me?” when you’re already married seems silly), but you can do a vow-renewal.
Post # 9
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
@violetshanty: She’ll be expecting it since she asked so don’t do anything for a few months. For that wow factor you’ll have to catch her off her guard! Maybe when driving somewhere scenic suddenly stop the car, get out and present an eternity band that matches her wedding set and reaffirm your feelings, how happy she makes you and future hopes and dreams 🙂