- 5 years ago
- Wedding: Central Park
I know this is a common thing but I’m getting so stressed out. I’ve done a great job pulling everything together, but since I’ve been immersed in weddng details for 9 months and doing it pretty much entirely myself I think I’ve just spent too much time wedding planning. A lot of it was DIY so I’ve been very, very involved. Now with 11 days to go I’m having nightmares everynight. It gets harder and harder to fall asleep because I know what I’ll dream about. I had a few nightmares early on in the planning but after a few days they stopped. I don’t even remember what they were about. But these last two I can’t seem to shake.
Last night’s was bizarre. We were at the B&B and we were hauling boxes and bins of stuff and I thought it was the week before, but then it turned out to be the day before. There was another wedding going on (the venue has maybe a wedding every 5 years, it’s very out of the box) and we were trying to get our stuff into a spare room so that we could set up the next day. I’m trying to direct people in where to put stuff and what to prioritize and then I remember that I haven’t picked up my dress! It’s one minute to store closing and I’ll never make it in time. I think about having my Maid/Matron of Honor pick it up, but then I realize that the store won’t release it to her without written permission. My FH is no where to be found, it’s just me, my girls, and my dad. Then a girl from the other wedding comes over and tries to sabotage our wedding set-up and spy on us. That’s when I woke up.
The one from the night before involved the reception. FH and I are having a dry wedding and to avoid drama and snuck in liquor we’re not telling anyone ahead of time. I know alcohol is expected and this seems sneaky, but there are a lot of alcoholics coming to the wedding and there’s some family drama and tension that would just be exponentially worse if certain people got drunk. In my dream I’m a the reception trying to find my now husband. A couple of guests (random people, not anyone in particular) are pissed about the lack of booze so they go to a bar and bring back drinks. They proceed to get drunk and start acting like fools, and other guests follow suite and bring back drinks. They’re stumbling around acting like idiots and I’m trying to find my husband so we can do our first dance. I finally find him and he’s changed out of his suit and into a T-shirt and I just start crying because we’ll never have our dance.
I know I need a break from the wedding stuff but it’s so hard because we’re so close now and I’m trying to get all of the little details finished up, and get people orchestrated. I’ve done this entire planning 99% on my own (including making a lot of DIY stuff) and I loved every minute of it but now my brain is trying to kill me with lack of restful sleep.
From analyzing my dreams it seems like I’m worried about not being in control of the wedding, and not finding the support I need to make the day a success.