- 4 years ago
- Wedding: August 2014
I think my wedding day was as all weddings should be remembered… memorable, fun, stressfree and intimate.
Our day came together with the help of family, a lot of diy projects (centre pieces, favors, decorations), the love and support of a wonderful bridal party, prayers from spiritual family and God ultimately. My husband and I have been hoping for this day for a while now and we had no idea how it would have unfolded. There were so many familial, financial and even spiritual challenges that having this day come together for us could have only been God’s hand moving and orchestrating it all.
The Less than Conventional Us.<br /><br />If there’s one word that could describe my husband and myself in terms of our relationship I think it would be unconventional. For one thing we had been long distance for the greater extend of our courtship/relationship. Our days and nights together were spent through skype convos, netfllix movie dates, online t.v. show catch ups and study dates while we were both at different universities, 21 questions and just sharing…(verbal dihorreah if you will). We had many miserable and memorable valentines days where we’d be annoyed with the happy go lucky couples around having moments we simply could only wish for, and then catch ourselves and realize the beauty of what we had. While many persons groaned at the prospect of having long distance relationships, we were some how making it work.
It was no surprise then that most aspects of this wedding process was similarly less than conventional. My first proposal came over Skype. I was in disbelief when Mr. Afirst asked that I joked about it, until he got really serious. The 2nd one, happned on Mr. A’s last visit home before the wedding. Things were in a rough place and I wanted some assurance that we could get through this storm. It was the unofficial proposal I think because there was no ‘ring’. I said yes each time. The 3rd proposal is my most memorable. Mr. A returned home on the Sunday before our wedding. It was at this point the reality of this change set in and as a typical bride to be, I had a flood of emotions and a major “freakout moment”. In that time Mr. A proved himself to be my rock and took the reins of the final wedding prep, calmed me down and reminded me that it’s Us+God in this equation…..so cast those fears on God and trust Him with our journey. To settle the fear in me, I asked him to ask me again, if he still wants to do this…….
Did I mention that this planning process was done with MR. A in one country and me in another a couple thousand miles apart? Thank God for modern technology which allowed us to design invitations, programmes, find favours, decorations etc. through email, FB and of course Skype.
Added to my husband being in another country, my Maid/Matron of Honor and bridesmaids were all coming in from other islands. (Did I mention I did not haved the conventional bridal experience). My Maids’ dresses were custom made, with measurements emailed to my seamstress and trials happened the Friday before the wedding…yes the FRIDAY before the SATURDAY wedding i.e. the day they arrived. (Sometimes I think I look for the added stress I receive in life.)
The one thing this less than conventional experience taught me was that the frills and trimming that we sometimes stress over for important moments like weddings,aren’t worth it. I may not have had a bridal shower or bachelorette party, but I had an awesome bridal party outing which included my girls and his guys. Our day of preparations took us back to our days in Uni…filled with real talk, jokes, laughter, silliness, love and friendship. And the party for the reception was the icing on an otherwise complete day.
The wedding was a bit conventional if you count a 30 mins ceremony conventional. Mr. A and I built a friendship where we do stuff together and support each other and are always honest with each other. As per these foundation guidelines which we have it was no surprise that we helped each other in the choice of gown for me and suit for him. I know some people may say “you’re taking away from the surprise and magic of it all”, but I’ve embraced the fact the normal doesn’t really apply to our relationship. Did it take away…..nope, not one bit. He never saw my dress fully altered and fitting me perfectly, I never saw him in his suit perfectly tailored. Add on the extra bits which dress up the day, I was as nervous and blushing as our first date.
Our colours were loud and bold, flamboyant as our personalities, yet the details were personal and spoke of our experiences and our direction. I’ve been to a few weddings in the last couple years and I can truly say that our wedding was OURS. I may have been inspired by boards(WeddingBee and Pinterest primarily,) but when you observe the details, Mr. & Mrs. A could be seen in the middle of it all.
Let’s talk Wedding Hair!
OH my goodness! If there ever was a challenge and stressor issued in wedding planning, I don’t think dress or menu options tops it more than hair. At least for me anyway. Coming down to the week of my wedding I still had not settled on my hair style option. Too much choice can be the devil…Being a natural hair bride, the sky is the limit in what can be done…Flat iron, blow dry,braid, twist, afro, cornrow….wear it high or low…..My demand for my hair style was a versatile style which would have allowed me to flexibility to go out with my girls the night before the wedding, style it differently for the day, survive the wedding day, dancing and night…..and be presentable for the honeymoon with no hair hassels. My final option was braiding………..a whole day affair. And for the women who braid hair, you know you have to get it done a few days in advance in order for the roots to be loose enough to style without much discomfort. The Hairstylist was the next challenge along with the style. After being disappointed and frustrated by a few even up till the day before my wedding..Yes the day before….My Maid/Matron of Honor did the honors of styling my bridesmaids and me….She saved the day in so many ways! A pic will follow. Now it may not have been the most elaborate bridal updo, but it was me and it fit beautifully. Next time…(10 yr anniv) if my hair isn’t locked I’m doing an afro puff and birdcage veil and calling it george.
Lesson learnt, trust yourself and your vision….and don’t settle for someone elses’ concept of what a bride should look like. I almost lost myself and came close to accepting a hairstylist’s verson of what a bride should look like. She couldn’t meet my needs and flipped it back on me.
If anyone has to have a wedding in St. Lucia W.I. I am suggesting these people who took great care of me and made our vision come true:
Venue: Bay Gardens Beach Resort for my reception and honeymoon, Lavelle, Carla and Tracy…..amazing job and the front desk staff!! Connected me to my MUA Hannah and videographer Eden Jervais Captured. our day in a compressed well edited vid….from preparation to finish.
Photos: Royan DesCarte Photography…He’s young passionate and full of energy. https://www.facebook.com/RoyanDescartesPhotography?fref=ts
We went for an old school playlist which had everyone young and old dancing…..My husband’s adamant choice.
This was my cathartic moment….writing and reliving these moments was good.
The biggest part of this wedding process for me I think was having to fight and push through to get what I wanted.
For one, my colours were Fuchsia, Orange and Black…decorators and wedding coordinators from other venues kept pushing/ suggesting using brown instead of black, because the black created a strong contrast in colours.
My mother hated the black option as part of the decor, and favors (black cake boxes) and bridesmaids dresses… I gave in to the black for my bridesmaids and went with fuchsia. It worked out well…..but I stuck with black in othert things and it worked out well…beautifully.
Make your wedding yours….The best marriage advice I’ve been given to date, from many other married couples: Make your marriage your own…<br /><br />
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.625983014176449.1073741890.293905467384207&type=3 Pics….. The inspiration that started it all Colour scheme cake inspiration(daisy love developed here)Favour boxesHair updo inspiration <br />Church pew bows inspirationCentre piece inspiration Bridal bouquet inspiration daisies and roses. Our invitations.
- This topic was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by SKyAlex.